The decision to start a family can bring on a lot of emotions; happiness, excitement, joy, and it can be easy to let your mind run wild of what it all might look like in 10 years. And the amazing part about starting a family is that it can happen in more ways than one.
There is the birth of a child, whether that be naturally, through in vitro fertilization, surrogacy, or adoption. And either one of these options can bring on feelings of sadness, anxiety, and more.
But when it is all said and done, nothing beats being able to share the love in your heart with someone who calls you “mommy” or “daddy.” And when it comes to Zac and Brittney Wolfe, that’s the thing they are most excited about.
You see, Zac and Brittney Wolfe may still be in their 20s, but they’ve lived a lot of life over the last several years. From being two crazy, young kids who fell in love to a tragic car accident that left Zac paralyzed, Zac and Brittney have been through more than people their age should have to go through.
But they persevered, they survived, and they stayed determined. And now, after five years of marriage, five years of trying to start their family, they are seeking to grow their unit through adoption.
In an interview via Facebook messenger, Brittney and Zac told Mamas Uncut that they intend to adopt domestically without using an agency. For those out there like me who didn’t know that was possible, the couple explained how this particular way of adopting a child works.
“So the first thing that needs to happen, in the state of Pennsylvania, is to become home-study approved. We are currently working with the Childrens’ Aid Society, based in Clearfield, PA. We are over halfway through the home-study process at this time,” Zac and Brittney told Mamas Uncut. “After we are approved we are able to adopt in the state of PA at any time. Ideally what would happen is an expectant birth mother would reach out to us, we would exchange information/our stories.”
From there, the expectant birth mother would meet with Zac and Brittany’s legal team to discuss “intentions, birth plan,” and anything else they might need to know. It is then that the expectant birth mother would consider Zac and Brittney a match, it’s the step in the process that the couple admitted they are “so extremely excited for.”
“There are several different options when it comes to private adoption and the ‘openness’ the birth parents and us would feel comfortable with,” Zac and Brittney told Mamas Uncut, “and these options would be discussed privately between us, the birth mother/parents, and our lawyer. We would hope to match with a family who is willing to allow us to be a part of their pregnancy and birthing experience.”
There is then a period of time that occurs once the baby is born before the adoption is considered final and legal. “It is definitely not an easy or quick process but we are so anxious and excited for our future,” the couple expounded.
Zac and Brittney admitted that their decision to forego using an adoption agency didn’t come easily, but after taking a few online classes after meeting with a few agencies based out of Pennsylvania, they knew it was the right one.
“Our decision didn’t come easy, as we realize, we are only 2 people living in a small town. But we also know that social media is so powerful and we have an AMAZING support system. The outreach we have received, even just in the past week, has been absolutely incredible.”
Following their decision, the couple created a Facebook page to document their journey. You can find that page here.
And the feeling to forego using an agency was the same feeling they had when they came to the decision to adopt. “It’s hard to put into words the feeling you have when you know something is RIGHT, but that’s exactly how we feel about parenthood,” they explained when asked why they choose a path as special as adopting a child.
“We are happiest when we’re sharing our lives with those that we love and what we want, more than anything, is to share these feelings with a child. Our life together is built on love, respect, trust, support, and honesty. We will strive to grow our family based on these values as well. We decided that it isn’t about HOW we become parents that matters to us, it’s about parenthood itself.”
Over the last five years, Zac and Brittney endured a battle with infertility. According to Infertility Answers, roughly “1 in every 8 couples are affected by infertility in the United States.”
The couple admits that despite how difficult the journey was and how vulnerable it has left them, they “have learned so much over the past several years.” They also admitted how mind-blowing it was for them to learn just “how common infertility actually is.”
“It was helpful once we realized we were not alone. YOU ARE NOT ALONE,” Zac and Brittney told Mamas Uncut. “We just kept pushing forward and came to realize we would have our family regardless if Brittney gave birth to a baby or not.”
“Our advice would be to not give up hope and to reach out and talk to someone, don’t hold things in. Infertility can be very trying on a relationship so you must support one another through these tough times.”
And when it comes time for Brittney and Zac to be called “mom and dad,” they hope to be the “parents our children are comfortable approaching in any situation. We both grew up being very open with our parents and we hope our children will follow in that.”
Both Brittney and Zac hope their children will take after each other. When it comes to Brittney, Zac describes her as a “smart, independent, and caring woman,” who is an extremely devoted and beautiful person regardless of if she’s dressed to the nines or rocking sweats.
Brittney is a registered nurse who has quite literally devoted her life to taking care of others. “She is great at balancing work and fun and is always the one to plan our adventures.” She also loves to dance, sing, cook, and will always make time for those most important to her.
“She is incredibly patient, dedicated, and loving with our dog, Otto, and I know she will be the same with our future kids,” Zac told Mamas Uncut. “She excels in almost everything she does which makes it so much harder to tell her she isn’t ALWAYS right. Brittney will make an amazing mother. Her nurturing quality cannot go unnoticed. I know she will love and protect her future kids and I know they will never go a day without immense love.”
And when it comes to Zac, from the stories Brittney has been told, “he was ALL BOY, ALL THE TIME.”
“Whether it was jumping his pedal-bike over a dirt ramp at 3 years old in his grandparents’ back yard or jumping his motorbike at 14 years old and wrecking, he is definitely what you would call a ‘motorhead.'”
So when Brittney learned he had been airlifted three different times in his life, it had come as no surprise to her. “I thank God to this day that we crossed paths with each other, mostly because I think I keep him grounded and out of trouble,” Brittney admitted.
Zac was also a devoted wrestler growing up. Brittney describes him as “very disciplined, dedicated, and driven,” and she believes those are qualities he learned from the sport. She also believes that these are the qualities that will make Zac “the most amazing father-figure to a child.”
“Zac is always the kids’ favorite and will definitely be the ‘fun’ parent, mostly because he is truly a kid at heart. Zac has taught me so much about life. Patience, acceptance, and motivation are his strong qualities. Being in a wheelchair has not slowed him down one bit and I admire him for being able to persevere in life and not let his injury hold him back.”
Brittney continued, saying “Zac contributes just as much as any able-bodied person to our home/family. He works, drives, and does housework,” she told Mamas Uncut, adding that she is most thankful “he actually enjoys cleaning.”
Zac currently works in the Quality Department of a local powdered metal plant and he has started a motivational blog, called Adaptive Outdoorz, LLC. It is through this blog that Zac shows “the world that a disability does not define a person.”
“I know in my heart he will love, protect, educate, and nurture his future child/children all the days of his life to the utmost best of his ability.”
Zac and Brittney both can’t wait to experience parenthood and all the craziness that comes with it, and that includes the “sleepless nights, baby cries, and endless laundry. Everything our friends complain about is what we are most anxious for,” the couple confesses. But there is also the fear of “the birth mother’s decision to take the child back in her care.”
“We obviously realize this decision doesn’t come easy for her and would respect each decision she makes,” the couple explained, “but being honest, that would be our biggest fear, is to grow attached to a child and the birth parents make the decision to revoke the adoption.”
And as for the message Zac and Brittney have for the birth mother out there who is looking for a family to love her child, this is what they have to say:
“We cannot imagine the whirl of emotions overwhelming you at this time. Before even meeting you, we know we are strong, selfless, and courageous. We honestly cannot even imagine the uncertainty you are facing. We want you to know that we love, protect, and nurture with our whole hearts. Family values are extremely important to us and we feel so blessed the way we were raised. We know our future child/children will be surrounded by so much love and support. We hope you will visit our website to learn more about us and please know every decision you make will be completely respected.”
If you are an expectant mother considering adoption, Zac and Brittney are two loving, caring, and kind people who are ready to welcome your little one into their family with open arms. We are wishing you the best of luck as you embark on this beautiful journey!