One mom is asking Reddit if she is the a****** for not informing her ex of their kid’s teachers.
“My ex (35M) and I (36F) divorced last year,” the OP (Original Poster) began. “In the beginning we were pretty civil. Things have changed & he’s pretty hostile with me. We have 2 kids together.”
“I have primary custody of our kids and have them about 75% of the time. The decree states the kids are to go to school in the zone based on my residence. Since I had moved out after our divorce, I’m in a new school zone. I have made him aware over the summer I need to follow the decree & transfer.”
“He was very against this. Ultimately it’s my decision but I try to get his input before decisions are made. I made sure the kids were okay with this transition to a new school, then registered them for school. I texted him to tell him they were now registered for the new school. No response.”
“The next day the school had a ‘meet the teacher night.’ I texted him the teachers’ name. No response. One of our daughters wanted a pink streak in her hair, I texted him to ask if he was okay with that, no response. There were a few other texts I sent with no response from him.”
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“I thought this was so bizarre bc pretty much all summer he’s been harassing me. Bc of this I have retained a lawyer to do a modification so a judge makes us use a parenting app to text. It should limit the harassment and abusive texts.”
“AM of the 1st day of school came & I was getting the kids ready for school. My phone was dnd. Checked the time & I had 17 missed calls from 7 am – 7:25. Then he called again. I told him I’m doing their hair but I’ll put you on speaker. He starts berating me telling me I ruined this special moment for him and he wanted to see them off”
“He made it seem to the kids that I intentionally left him out of loop. Even tho our homes are in diff school zones, he lives close. I told him we are leaving for school in 10 min & he can meet us there. We hung up, I texted him the teachers’ names again.”
“He didn’t show up. Later I got many abusive texts. He said I ‘f-ed up’ his chance to see them off. He told me he needs to take custody of the kids for ‘what I’ve done.’ I asked why he waited until the morning of the first day of school to make arrangements w me. He said he blocked me bc I called his new gf’s son a friend of our kids instead of brother.”
“My kids had never said brother but call him a BFF. He said I disrespected him & his family & this was my punishment. Him blocking me is like, #GOALS. /s bc I know the kids need contact w him, but it was nice those few days not hearing from him. I feel like this is completely on him.”
“Had he not blocked me, he would have received important texts regarding the kids and info on their new school and teachers’ names. He also could have made arrangements the night prior after he was done ‘punishing’ me (lol). All he did was punish himself and his children. What if there had been an emergency? I could be blinded by my frustration w him, but I need to know, AITA?”
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One user said: “Man you need to bring this up with the judge again. He legit is just harassing you. This type of attitude should warrant some attention from the judge. NTA by the way.”
While another commented: “NTA – and you need to save and document every bit of his communication. Don’t delete. Don’t edit. Make backups of everything. Go to your lawyer and pursue a change of conditions. He doesn’t get to ‘punish’ you for anything. Ever. It’s his own abuse which is f****** up his relationship with the children. You’ve been reasonable. You’ve attempted to include him and keep him apprised of household changes. You’ve made the effort to co-parent and what he’s giving you in return is abuse and attempts at parental alienation.. Which, without living with him full-time will not have the same effect, but it hurts the children none the less to have him attempt to turn them against you.”
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