Amanda Kloots opened up to The New York Times about her regrets in her marriage with Nick Cordero, who died in July 2020 due to COVID-19.
Amanda Kloots talked about the mistakes she made in her marriage.
Kloots self-deprecatingly admitted that “I was not a good wife” to Nick. Before the pandemic, Cordero was planning to change his career path from actor to singer-songwriter, including moving out of their home in New York City, where they had a lot of family, to Los Angeles. He believed he could find work as an actor on film while having an easier time making connections with the music industry.
Amanda Kloots explained how “I was not understanding any of it,” as she did not see the value of moving to Los Angeles or Nick’s songwriting, continuing, “I was like, ‘This is a waste of time, and we have no money.’ He did not feel supported by me. I wasn’t supportive.” However in fall 2019, Kloots came to an understanding with Cordero. “I finally came to a place of, ‘This is marriage, you have to compromise.'”
As her husband was in the hospital, Kloots realized she “learned to appreciate his music too late,” after seeing how her Instagram community rallied around his song, “Live Your Life.” Followers posted singalongs at 3 p.m. to show their support for Nick, even with his passing in July. Now, she is “determined to keep his voice alive.”
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Amanda Kloots struggled with not being able to say goodbye to her husband.
Amanda also opened up about the difficult process of losing her husband without the ability to say goodbye. Even getting Nick to the hospital was harrowing as, “With Covid restrictions in place, we didn’t know which entrance was even open, so I left him on the corner. We didn’t hug. We didn’t kiss goodbye. We couldn’t. It was clear he was sick with something and we couldn’t take any risks.”
As she left him on the corner out of caution for the safety of her family, “I don’t even know if he said bye to Elvis or if we said, ‘I love you.’ I told him I’d stay nearby and to call me when he’s done,” as they both thought he would only be there for “a couple hours.”
Tragically she revealed “That was the last day I saw Nick as Nick. My heart breaks today. I wish I could go back in time, run to him as he was walking away, grab him, kiss him and hold him in my arms. On April 1, he went on the ventilator and I never spoke to him again.”