Am I being over dramatic that my boyfriend almost missed the birth of our baby?

I just had my baby almost three weeks ago, and I’ve been struggling with something… I went into labor nine weeks early, as I was going into labor, I was trying to tell my boyfriend but, he wouldn’t wake up. He tells me he was too tired and thought it was a dream. I had to get a different ride in the middle of the night. When I got to the hospital, I tried texting and calling him. I was finally able to contact him, and he just barely made it to the hospital in time to watch the birth. He walked into my room, as they were wheeling me into the O-R. I can’t get the thought out of my head that he almost missed the birth… and I went through the laboring process alone… Am I being dramatic for being upset? Any tips on looking forward and forgiving him for this?

92 Likes

He didn’t miss it. You’re creating a situation in your head that NEVER HAPPENED

14 Likes

Yes. At least he made it. Some never even bother to meet the child. Get over it and move on. Don’t let it get bigger than it is. It will hurt you in the end. You can either let it go or live like you are till you get tired of carrying that around. Do yourself a favor and move on. That baby needs you. Focus your energy on your child and not something that’s not worth fighting about.

10 Likes

Yes. You’re being over dramatic. He didn’t miss it. Sorry but just enjoy that he was actually there. My husband missed our daughters birth because he was deployed.

He made it, what’s the prob? He may not be ready for that baby. Especially if it was unplanned. He will make it through. Y’all got bigger fish to fry now.

7 Likes

He should’ve woken up immediately and brought you. Just because some guys suck worse doesn’t give men the excuse to not be good humans.

22 Likes

I believe its hard for guys who work hard to get up. It was about 5am when i went into labor and i didn’t know. I didn’t even know my water broke. I thought i just peed on myself until my mom said my water broke. I called my husband and it took him a while to get up. He got up but was doing everything so slow. I guess bc he wasn’t fully awake. Maybe give your boyfriend a break. He probably didn’t mean too. At least he was there before the birth.

Umm… how hard did you try to wake him? A glass of cold water over his head or pushing him off the bed should have done the trick. Sounds like he has a sleeping prob…seek medical advice. Or, were you setting him up to fail?

14 Likes

…Almost doesn’t count… he made it there and that’s what matters most. Being nine weeks early he probably did think he was dreaming but I do think he should of woken up to bring you to the hospital … only you know if he works many hours and if he’s a deep sleeper & I know your upset and that’s understandable but I think you should work on forgiving him. I’m sending love and prayers your way. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy :yellow_heart::sunflower:

4 Likes

My fiance didnt make it to the birth of our second daughter because he was caring for our first but he walked in seconds after she was born and you know what he doesnt love her any less and she is a daddys girl through and through. It broke my heart he couldnt be there but i wouldn’t hold it against.

Am I the only one picking up on the fact they were together and she had to get a ride… cause I’d be mad too. Regardless is unplanned or unpredicted he should of been on it

29 Likes

Honestly, he sounds like a complete and utter twat.
Too bad if he was tired. Too bad again, if it had turned out to be a false alarm.
He should have taken care of you (and baby) when you needed him the most, and you were vulnerable.

He didn’t. He’s a dick. You’re not in the wrong for having a problem with that.

Having said all of that, however; don’t hold on to the anger or disappointment for too long. Yes, he fucked up. But not in a way that the two of you can’t recover from. He should have been much more attentive, absolutely; but he did still make it to the birth of the baby you share.
Holding on to the anger/disappointment will only turn it in to resentment, and that will be very difficult to recover from.

Feel what you feel, absolutely. But you have to let it go, too, and sooner rather than later.

18 Likes

I think you need to think about how easy or hard it is to wake him up any other time. Some people just cant be woken up.

3 Likes

He made it, that counts …why was he so hard to wake? I’d be asking that question if this wasn’t his normal sleeping. Was he high, drunk or just plain wore out from working? Guess we need more info on him to better understand why you couldn’t get him awake. Congrats on the little one and enjoy your bundle of joy!

2 Likes

Now I’d be pissed if I had to get a ride from someone other than my husband but labor can be stressful. Men don’t know what to expect or how much pain we are in. He made it for the birth so don’t make it what it isn’t. You may be having postpartum anxiety about it too

ditch him. He is not responsible enough to have children

6 Likes

a miracle just happened in your life. Focus on that. There will always be issues in your relationship with your boyfriend. If you want to be happy, focus on life’s blessings as much as you can.

I am getting the impression you don’t live together…so if you mean you tried phoning ect before you left and he never heard th phone then fair enough he might have not been long sleeping and that can happen to all of us tbh.Now you have a baby the hard work begins so if your not on the same page now then I’m sorry the future don’t look bright🤷🤷🤷

You’re over reacting. He WAS THERE THAT’S what matters

3 Likes

You went to the hospital alone. Thats a description of how the rest of it is gonna go. You doing what you have to and him showing up when he feels like it.

14 Likes