Am I Being Paranoid About Letting In-Laws Stay in My House During COVID?

QUESTION:

"Got into a huge fight with my fiancé last night because he invited his sister/husband to stay with us for the weekend in a couple of weeks.

I’m still deathly afraid of COVID and haven’t had anyone stay in the house since March or really even visit other than a quick necessary drop-by. Not even my mother has stayed with us.

Am I being paranoid here or is anyone else back to usual and having a get-together at home? We’re in Texas if that helps."

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

“No you are not. You are only advocating for your health and no one should put you down do that. A home is your safe place where you shouldn’t have to worry about the outside world. I am doing the same thing!”

“I’m in Texas as well and have people over. You have to get on with life and stop living in fear. You can take precautions like masks and having people sanitize their hands, but you can pick up the virus simply by going to the store, going to get gas, etc…”

“I don’t think you’re paranoid at all. Part of the reason we’re not past all this crap yet is that people refuse to do what is needed to decrease positivity rates. I’d be comfortable hanging out with them outside, with masks, but not in my house. Only members of my household are allowed in my house. Do not allow yourself to be made to feel guilty for following your instincts and doing the right thing.”

“I didn’t see my mom since march as well. Bc of covid. She died unexpectedly in July. Worst mistake of my life. As long as you take precautions, I would say let them visit. Have hand sanitizer out. Check their Temps if you have to. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable. But don’t shut your loved ones out.”

“My little family is not going around anyone. I hadn’t seen my mom and brother in five months and the live fifteen minutes away. I only started seeing my mom and brother last month again. It’s so hard. Why do they need to actually stay with you? Maybe offer to pay for their hotel, if possible? He shouldn’t have made that decision without running it by you. Covid-19 numbers seem to be going up again, so I see your concern.”

“OMG, no girl, you are DEFINITELY NOT PARANOID. America is in the grip of a pandemic that is getting worse. Put ya foot down and just say “No Way”. Not until this thing is under control.”

“I haven’t had any visitors, visited anyone’s house, and no one has met my baby. Personally, I think he should have spoken with you before inviting guests over during a pandemic. You’re not being paranoid, you’re being safe.”

“I live in Texas, and there’s no way I would feel comfortable. It’s easy for other people to tell you to live your life. Yes, it’s his house too, but if he’s the one bringing potential harm then he’s the one that doesn’t get to do it. Just because we’re so far into the pandemic doesn’t mean it’s over or less of a threat. We’re building up to another peak! Just because others are ready to move on or turn a blind eye to getting sick doesn’t mean you should feel any obligation to move on with them. Yes, risk factor assessment is a great tool, but with this still being a novel virus that we’re seeing affect people of all ages and health levels, the risk will never be worth it to me. My two kids and I stay home all the time. My husband goes to work with a full respirator and comes home. We get groceries delivered. We’re doing everything we can to absolutely minimize exposure and risk, and we will continue until the is a reasonable solution. I had my second child in May, and he has only met grandparents because they quarantined for two weeks before he was born.”

“You do what’s best for you. If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it. We haven’t let anyone in our house.”

“Everyone has their own comfort level! Personally, we are not letting Covid rule our lives. We’ve traveled and stayed with friends, and we have friends and family over. We’re in CA where out Gov likes to shut everything down…so connecting with friends and family is crucial to our mental health! Do what makes you and your family feel comfortable!”

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READ ALL ANSWERS BELOW:

25 Likes

Covid is spreading because ppl don’t know basic hygiene…cover mouth withe elbow whole coughing/sneezing, washing hands, and staying out of peoples personal space (6ft) like they are really just telling you to have basic hygiene…You can not live your life in fear like this…covid will ALWAYS be around now forever…viruses don’t just disappear…it’s now here to stay and will forever be around for many many years…so to stay inside and not visit ppl etc doesn’t make sense tbh

2 Likes

Maybe a bit paranoid. I would definitely talk to you guests prior to their arrival and ask about exposure or how they are feeling. Explain your concern. There is no reason you guys can’t be smart and safe and still enjoy life.
:heart:.

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Here’s my concern. If you have been staying away from people and the environment, your immune system has been weakened. You need to be around germs to keep the ability to fight sickness. It’s just a fact. Your chance of getting sick is higher. It happened to a friend of mine. Stayed in for 3 months. Went nowhere. Started work, cutting hair, and was sick within a week.
So I probably wouldn’t have anyone in my house.

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It is not being paranoid! I am sorry that he didn’t think to discuss it with you first and take your opinion into consideration.

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I am back to regular life :woman_shrugging:t2: my kids have been back in school for 4 weeks and have had 3 positive cases at their school. They are in 1st and Kindergarten. Their school has been very upfront and I have had both of them tested when they had runny noses due to allergies. I think it is your personal belief and opinion on everything rn :woman_shrugging:t2:

2 Likes

This is where it gets weird.

It’s your Home. Whether it is a cardboard box or a castle, this is where you can be naked and safe.

First thing you NEED to address is that fact with whomever is also on the lease/mortgage/whatever understands that fact.

Personally, I believe:

Your House. You have the Right to refuse shelter. No matter. No explanation.

House Williams is a Safe Place, especially for strays, but this rule is in effect.

6 Likes

Most places offer rapid tests now. Ask them to get a tested before they come to your house. Takes 15mins. Better to be safe. But live your life, covid is not going anywhere any time soon.

Covid went through my house months ago and I was sick for weeks. My live in nanny is immunocompromised and was practically bedridden for over a month. It’s nothing to play around with. Most people bounce back pretty quick but when it hits hard it’s awful. I still have breathing issues. And I got to deal with it while tending to my sick 9month old and 2 year old as well. Thankfully they only got it mildly and were past it in a few days and my husband got past it in about a week.

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You can’t hide forever. Live your life and enjoy your family. Life is too short to sit at home for months on end without seeing anyone.

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That is ur family and u make the decision. U have doubts so don’t let them visit. U rather be safe than sorry esp when u have kids that u have to protect.

You’re not paranoid. You have a right to be concerned. You don’t know if those people take precautions.
Everyone makes it out like it’s just the FLU but it isn’t. I now have lung damage from it.I got it back in March before everything shut down. I hope one day soon I will start to feel better.

5 Likes

With all the horrible scare tactics I am sure many feel the way you do. Yes, people have died BUT this virus has a 99% survival rate. You can’t guarantee you won’t catch it BUT you can know 99% is huge numbers of survival. I’m not saying be stupid and throw caution to the wind I’m just saying don’t live in debilitating fear of it. This virus is not going anywhere. It will continue just as the flu does (yes I know it’s worse than the flu). Like I said, be cautious as you always are…just not reclusive.

9 Likes

You definitely sound paranoid. Living in complete fear. Be wise and use common sense, build your immune system and LIVE. So do you not drive or ride in a car either die to the death rates attributed to car accidents? Just asking.

31 Likes

We’re in SC and we were like that with our kids when the pandemic first started, however we’ve now let our guard down a little. We’re only around people we know have been avoiding large groups & staying safe. The majority of people we’ve been around is family, a very few friends & their children. I suffer from a panic & anxiety disorder, germs are a huge trigger for me. Your anxiety is valid & if you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it, you’ll only be miserable during their stay worrying about the what if’s. If you feel like you could cut back some and still stay ahead of any anxiety while they’re there then that may work too.

2 Likes

Yes paranoid. It’s your family. And that’s very disrespectful to treat your husband that way over seeing his family. It’s been since March when will you live life again this will continue on into 2021. Covid will never fully disappear. It’ll be the new flu people sometimes catch yearly…

15 Likes

You know what that’s so wrong that you got to worry if you’ll get sick I think maybe your husband should of stood up for you and said no you come first there hotel if you get sick he will be sorry

Nope, not paranoid at all, same here. Our children are going to school and thats it. We have a newborn and nobody has seen her

Well, you are paranoid and should probably think about opening your home back up. However, if your husband should be willing to communicate issues with you and you guys should both respect each other’s boundaries. Maybe talk to those invited over about it and see if they could take some extra precautions. Hope it all gets better for you💕

No you are absolutely right in trying to protect yourself and family…I too haven’t let anyone in my house not even my children but it hurts so much to not hug them…my husband and I are high risk.

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No, people are just bored and like to think the pandemic isn’t going on. If you have that gut feeling to protect your family then do it. It’s always better to play it safe than to be sorry. My husband and I are extremely paranoid but I mean it is what it is better for us all to be healthy and come back together one day than to lose someone. Don’t let anyone else try to convince you that something is mild or not real listen to science.

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