Ok, here it is. I was stressed, frustrated, and exhausted, mom! My husband works seasonal, so in winter he’s home. I was laid off due to a shortage of work, but shortly after found a new job. Despite my husband telling me to take a break and enjoy being home and enjoy the summer! I couldn’t survive on govt benefits. I work Monday-Friday leaving 630M not getting off work until 4 pm- so home at 5! If I’m lucky, with no stops on the way home. I get he’s been taking our little one to school BUT seriously, do I have to do everything? I work full time, do all the shopping, come home and cook dinner, clean after that. My weekend is full of real cleaning, laundry, and getting ready for the upcoming week. I also do the homework and personal hygiene with my kid. In his eyes, he does so much already, but in reality, he doesn’t. When I’ve tried talking to him, he makes comments saying as though he works hard long hours in the summer, this is his time. But yet, when do I get my time?!? In the summer, I do IT ALL. ALL of it. Housework, yard work, gardening, taking kids on holidays, everything. I’m mentally exhausted from work already and everything else, he bleeping snores so bad at night I can’t sleep at all. He says, wakes me up-. When I do, he gets kissed and starts snoring in seconds. I Just Can’t catch a break. If I try to talk or tell him how I feel, he becomes very offensive and angry. I feel as though I’m losing attraction as well. Top it off, I’ve been on a weight program, and binge eating is not helping at all! Trying to lose the weight, not f gain it all back. I’m dreading summer approaching, but at the same time, not because sun will be out and it’s like I’ll get a bleeping break from another child in the house that does bleeping nothing. Am I wrong to be loosing attraction and wanting to scream my head off?!?
You are not his wife, you are his mom. As long as you act like it, he will let you.
Yeah i think i would leave you already proved to yourself you can do it on your own and get child support so he will get a real job working all year instead of depending on the government half the year leave the summer jobs for highschool and college kids. It would be different if he made enough money to help carry you all through his time off. You deserve better! You deserve you don’t give that up.
Tell him he can either fix it or file for divorce. Some times people don’t change.
You’re not wrong for feeling that way. I’ve been in those shoes. It’s very frustrating.
Unfortunately it doesn’t ever change. When I was with my child’s dad I felt like I was a single parent, while he lived his life, so I left.
Omg I feel the same way lol
Tell him that he is a parent and it’s his house also that he doesn’t get to take all this time off just because he works hard in the summer. You work everyday no matter what and you need him to pitch in more now. And if he’s gonna get mad about that then I would say get a different job where you work normal all year and not just in one season where it’s so hard. He’s not single and needs to stop acting like he doesn’t share half of the responsibilities.
Leave him. If he only works in summer then he should help with housework. He can do shopping and make dinner since you get home at 5
And thats is how love die in marriage
I couldn’t stay attracted to a man that acts this way so no I don’t think you’re wrong. You aren’t his mother. He needs to help out more. You need a man that cleans, cooks and takes care of his children. To me that is sexy as hell and is important for you to be able to continue to be attracted to him physically and emotionally. If talking to him about it isnt working maybe you should suggest therapy.
Might read the book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
by John Gray.
Try writing out a task list for him each day. Go over the list with him to ensure buy in and understanding
Sounds like a child. Would be nice if he would man up and contribute to the household. Most of the time people like this only change if they experience a great shock or loss.
I had this issue with my ex, we ended up separating and honestly it was the best thing we could have done tbh. We’re now both able to co parent and communicate well and now he pulls his weight
No. Theres no bigger turn off I find then a man that don’t get dirty or try to contribute in some way or another
You’re not his mum. You’re his wife. The only reason he don’t do anything is because he knows yourl do it
Omg—- you wrote my story!! Only mine is retired and does nothing but sit in his recliner and gripe about EVERYTHING!!
Tell him that you are losing your attraction to him if you’d like to give him one more chance. Because once that’s gone, it’s over.
Counseling. Also if his job takes more physically it could be why he’s more drained. Communication is key. You may think you are but you may be coming off as attacking and he put up his guard. Tell him what you need help with. He’s not a mind reader.
I work hard all summer so winter is my break? Ok that’s bullshit. He’s lazy using working hard during the summer as an excuse to not do shit in the winter. He’s an adult, he needs to step up and start acting like one
Time to stop doing it all