Anyone else have a passive aggressive mother in law?

Y’all, do any of you also have in-laws that just get on your damn nerves 24/7. Once a week, we have a big family dinner; I bought roasted tomato and mozzarella chicken cutlets to make. The directions say they can be cooked in a skillet on the stove or on aluminum foil in the oven. I prefer cooking my chicken on the stove. Please tell me why this woman comes over and complains because I’m not going to cook it in the oven, so I run to the dollar store to get foil… I come back to the house, and she’s cooking the chicken in the skillet. Yes, I understand it’s not that big of a deal, but Jesus lord, it’s annoying as hell.

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Just smile and nod and have her cook next time. Life is too short to let others stress you out. Lol

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I know what you mean.

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Smile and say well, you can cook next time!

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Just tell her that this is how you do it and that’s the end of it

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Moms can be gone in the blink of an eye. Appreciate that she’s alive.

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Be thankful you get a night off of cooking💜

Your house, your cooking style. Next time she can cook it at her house however she wants.
No need to stress over it, but also no need to bend over backwards to please her

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My house, my rules, …don’t like it, stay home. Simple.

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Ahhhh, the nitpicker. Always lovely to have one in the family and yes, every family has one.
Not everyone developed the skill to negotiate relationships with maturity and grace. Sounds like she falls into that category.
She’s likely rather narrow minded, probably not ‘worldly’ in that she’s had exposure to multiple cultures, societies, if she’s travelled, it’s with an ‘entertainment’ perspective, rather than learning from others around her, etc.
You’re possibly dealing with a woman that never bothered to expand her intelligence, experiences and life skills beyond her comfort zone.
Clearly, she’s not all bad, after all, you married her offspring.
If anything in the above statement seems to fit, respectfully disregard her opinion, humor her with a polite “that seems interesting, maybe I’ll try it”.
She’s unfortunately, rendered herself irrelevant to anyone beyond her own comfort zone circle :woman_shrugging:

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Tell her in your house you do things your way. Just because it’s not the way she does or would do something doesn’t mean it’s wrong. You can agree to disagree but you have to be the woman of your house and not let her run over you. Your husband needs to speak up and address this with his mother. Stand up for yourself in your house.

Set her straight now or this is just the beginning. Be tactful, be firm dont let her manipulate you.

My ex MIL used to do the same thing. Everything I did was wrong and she expected me do everything her way. It caused a lot of fights with my ex- husband. We have been divorced for 6 years and I have to say, it’s a relief to do things my way! I feel your pain. I guess the question is: is it worth an argument or not? It wasn’t for me; I always left my mouth shut. Not my recommendation at all lol

I understand how this could be annoying, but in the grand scheme of things how you cook chicken is not a big deal. Let her do it and sit back and relax. Every relationship requires you to pick your battles. As long as boundaries regarding your marriage and raising of children are not crossed, the rest is really no biggie. Just my humble opinion.

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One time may not be a big deal, but multiple times becomes a big deal. I lived with that kind of mother-in-law. Nothing I did was good enough for her. I didn’t dress right, I didn’t cook right, I didn’t clean house right, I didn’t take care of my children right. Believe me, I tried. I tried so hard that I lost myself in the process. Don’t give up whom you are trying to please your mother-in-law. And if I become that type of mother-in-law, please somebody shoot me!!!

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I love my MIL but lord she tries our patience! Like she will offer to make something, then will complain about how hard it was to find ingredients or supplies, or that it was so hard to do. We didn’t ask her to make ice cream for our daughter’s birthday because of that. She proceeded to tell everyone we were too good for it! Ugh. Always acts like its a competition between her and I with cooking. Snide remarks about how we do things, etc

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Well to avoid it, maybe make the food at home then take it over there. Also your husband needs to step in if she does this to you all the time. Or have a one on one (recorded) talk with her. I say record it because I don’t how this mil is. If you kerp letting this happen, you will snap and have a big fight with husband

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Life is short , don’t make an issue out of things that aren’t, your in her home, if you have a dinner once a week at her home, fix your dishes at your home, then when you get to her house you can just enjoy,if she ask why did you cook at home, just smile and say it gives you more time to visit , don’t look for things to get on your nerves, look around for the good things, after all she raised the man you love and are married to, as you put out a more positive attitude perhaps that will bring out her positive side more, enjoy your meals together.

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She was cooking it in the skillet like you were going to do she was helping you. I go to my son’s house and I like to do things to help. Just appreciate instead of complaining. If it bugs you don’t go over for dinner every week

Love at a distance if she can’t respect your boundaries and the way you do things then stop family dinners until she respects your home. Don’t let someone come in and tell you what to do in your house.