Do you think toddlers understand when their parents are no longer together?

Do you think a child two almost 3 understand that mommy and daddy are no longer together? Then he stays with daddy and goes to mommys house Tuesday Wednesday and comes home late Thursday…I tell him we are going to stay at mommy he will get his bag


Yes they do. They can be as young as babies and tell that something is different and off when they split.

They understand something is different, but unless you make a big deal out of it then they will adjust pretty quickly and not know any different. Children are very resilient and adapt quickly.

He will do fine …kids are resilient. Hopefully you and the ex are on the same page and it’s amicable…

It took awhile but my daughter did. Once she realized he was gone her temperament changed, slept better & stopped asking for him. But she didn’t go back & fourth. He’d come over when he felt like it until he lost total interest. I think going back & fourth can be confusing. Hopefully he’ll stay consistent & keep other things how they’ve always been (bedtime, meals, disipline etc).

My bonus babies will say they don’t have a dad and their other house. They know my husband and his ex aren’t together but as long as everyone can co parent I don’t think it causes any long term issues. Be ready for questions when they are older though.

Yes kids are like sponges they take notes till they understand the full term of what has changed

Yes and it is a terrible thing to happen to a child at any age

How the kid deals with it depends on the parents 100%, if you make it normal, don’t talk crap and keep things positive, he won’t know things were supposed to be any different

I got divorced when my kids were almost 4 and 1 year old. The 4 year old knew mommy and daddy don’t live together anymore and she’d get excited for a sleepover with daddy. She understood that we both loved her but didn’t love each other anymore. She also understood very quickly that mommy was a lot happier because there was no more fighting. They grew up this way and never had a problem until he stopped seeing them for awhile when they were 8 and 5…then all heck broke loose!

I think they do realize that something is different and that mom and dad aren’t both there. With time they will adapt and that will be the only thing they know. Remember kids are tough and resilient. Try to maintain a good age appropriate dialogue with them and they will be fine. Hang in there momma :heart:

My daughter understands completely that her father and I are no longer together. We live together at the moment (I tried coparenting with him to no avail), but she knows that I am with someone else. She just turned three

It’s beyound their comprehension at such a young age. My oldest child was only 3 when her dad and I divorced and it was a struggle for her mostly because she didn’t understand why she only got to see mommy and daddy at separate times and not together. Everything changed for her and as it was hard for me to move out and get my own place, it was just as hard for her. Her routine changed so much. I don’t think she actually understood what had happened until she was about 5-6 years old.

It depends on if they remember a time when mom and dad lived together. It might just seem normal to them to have mommy’s house, and daddy’s house. The important thing is that everyone can get along and be civil, even when they’re no longer in a relationship.

Absolutely. Kids are FAR smarter than we give them credit for.


Children sense emotion. They want a set routine too. Don’t let them feel or hear you speaking against each other and give them unconditional love. Don’t let them sense guilt. As they grow and ask questions give brief honest responses.

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My son used to cry at night because he missed his daddy… he was 2 at the time and would cry when I would go to take him home from dads they definitely understand

Yes definitely. As a mom of 3, teacher and bonus mom yes they definitely know


Yes they do. Very perceptive munchkins.

100% yes. Some underestimate kids and just think “they really dont know”. Believe me, they watch your every move and can fell when you’re not yourself or if stuff has changed.