Does it count if you have to ask for a compliment from your spouse?

I have a question if your spouse doesn’t complement you ever at anything you do or doesn’t acknowledge that you look nice ever, ( keep in mind in honeymoon staged this was occurring) and then tells you “oh your being silly of course you look nice” after you mentioned to him did you notice the good deed I did or I’m wearing what you bought me” comment? Does it still count after the fact?!?

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I feel the same way :woman_shrugging:t3: either make a sincere compliment or don’t compliment me at all lol

If you have to ask for the compliment, it’s not really a compliment

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I showed my husband an empty bottle of water I drank and told him I needed credit for it. Lol

Sometimes they remember to say their compliments out loud instead of just in their head and sometimes they need prodding.

You need to discuss love languages with your spouse, it seems like words of affirmation are a big one for you. Understanding each other’s love languages is important in order to make your SO feel loved and appreciated.
It takes work, but happy marriages weren’t supposed to be easy :purple_heart:

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Nope it doesn’t count its like mentioning the girl at work got flowers and wondering why your spouse doesn’t ever buy you flowers and then he runs out and gets some, if you have to ask for it then it isn’t genuine.

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some men are just not like that
they instead show appreciation

then u get those who go overboard mode wit the supposed compliments, especially infront of people omg now that is pathetic much!

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My boyfriend tells me I’m hot every damn day… it doesn’t get old.

My ex never complimented anything I did. I used to have to fish for them… then it made me feel even worse.

If you have to ask, it takes away the purpose.
You get complimented on things, because they appreciate or notice something. Not because you had to ask for it.

I had this issue , I told my husband how I felt, and he explained that of course he thinks I look good. He just assumed I knew the attraction was there lol men are wired soooo diffrent than us . He does his best now forsure . I understood him though and dont get hurt if he doesn’t say it as much as I want him too lol.

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Dress like a bum and see what happens

You should definitely communicate with him how you need affection expressed. Men will never read our minds. We have to tell one another how we want to be loved and showed affection. Ask the same from him and how you can show him affection.

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If you’re asking for a compliment and they are telling you what you want to hear that is not a compliment.

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Smh don’t u have anything else to complain or nag about? I see why divorce is at a all time high or people just simply don’t get married at all anymore. Aww boowoo he doesn’t tell me I’m pretty enough! How often do u tell him he’s handsome, or a good husband, or that u are proud him? When is the last time u told him u appreciated him? It’s a two way street. U sound so selfish.

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My husband never compliments me directly, I have to ask. It doesn’t matter what it is, if I dress up, cook dinner, change my hair redecorate the house. Nothing. But he tells people I’m a really good cook, that he thinks I’m a good housekeeper, that he thinks I’m beautiful. That means a lot. Do I wish he would tell me sometimes? Yes! But it’s just the way he is.

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If your doing things, and expecting complements and validations, you’re not performing “good deeds”.

My husband is not great at showing affection. He is just not that type of person. Some people just are that way and it doesn’t mean they love you any less just that they show love in a different way

Everyone has different love languages and yours is probably words of affirmation so I would try to figure out what his is. I’m sure it’s not that he doesn’t think you look good guys are just so different from us woman

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My husband thinks going “hmm” and smacking my ass is a compliment. :joy::joy:
I don’t expect compliments from him which makes even better when he actually does.
My 4yo son compliments me all the time though and my 6yo son told me I looked beautiful once, melted my heart.

Sounds like u r grasping at straws for something to be mad about. Look in the mirror. THATS The person with a problem.

After first date or so…I wouldn’t expect many compliments. Seems like men think that you know they think you are pretty just by them being with you. It’s just like I don’t compliment my husband every day. After a little while together,you only expect it on special occasions. Seems ridiculous to fish for compliments after awhile…to me anyway.If he is with you,then you are pretty to him. I only ask for.compliments if wear a new dress…which is very rare