Does it sound like my mother in law is playing favorites?

I have two kids, a 2.5-year-old daughter, and a one-year-old son. My MIL recently knitted a poncho and a little butterfly for my daughter and sent nothing for my son. No sweater, no knitted toy… nothing. I don’t want to sound ungrateful or anything, but I feel like this is favoritism. My son is too young to care, but as they get older, I obviously don’t want this to continue to be an issue. Is it worth bringing up to her? I normally avoid unnecessary contact with her.

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Nah, not until it happens again.

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Because he is so young I wouldn’t make a big deal, maybe you will be sent a sweater later for him…

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I’d bring it up, and tell her I’d Like it if you only have something for some of my kids then I’d suggest you wait until you have something for both my kids. Tell her you’d like for things to be Fair for Both your kids no matter what age they are. And then say if you can do this I’d really appreciate it.

I dont think its favoritism at this point… maybe she wants her to have a little extra attention with a baby brother around…be patient

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Maybe MIL cannot think what to send for the younger one yet. Is it the first time? Next time if same thing happens, then maybe you can nicely bring it up.

Maybe she saw the pattern and just thought it was cute and wanted to make one. Let’s be real, clothes girls are much cuter than boys lol. If it happens more often I’d take to her about it though.

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Well I have to say knitting and crochet type items generally take a while. She may not have a piece finished, she may be waiting for the child to be older and understand. But me personally if I send one grandchild something I’m not gonna leave out the other, I don’t care how old they are.
But if I noticed a pattern at all I would say Hey we will not be having any double standards, playing favorites, Besides birthdays if a child gets a present every child in the house gets one.

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If it’s a one time thing I wouldn’t. But if it happens again I would mention it

Its just wrong! I would definitely raise the issue . Kindly but seriously!

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just ask if she forvot to se d your sons gift when she sent tbe girls say I know that ylu love sll 3 Nd would never hurt any of thier feelings.

Does your son’s bedroom have a theme? Maybe suggest she knit a something to go with it and see what she says? I wouldn’t bring up favoritism though if this is the first time.

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As a person who knits, that project probably took quite a bit of her time. Weeks, even months (depending on how much free time she has.) Probably just didn’t want your daughter to outgrow it by the time the other kids gift.) I give my children their knitted gifts as soon as they are done. One shawl took over a year, my husband’s blanket took me 2 1/2 years. The next big hooded cloak only took 2 months of taking my kids to dental appointments for fillings. They understand the hours of my life that goes into each piece. (And for getting one kid something and not the other, grandparents usually even those things out.)

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Maybe praise her for the beautiful poncho and ask politely if she is able to make your son a jumper also.

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Maybe she just finished the daughters piece and then she will work on something for your son. I have 2 grandchildren and every now and then I see something that just suits one. So I buy it. And don’t get the other something. And vice versa. I’m not playing favorites, it may just be that I happened to see such an item. I would let it go unless it’s a constant problem. But 1 time is not a big deal especially at the age they are.

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A couple things…
-crocheting takes time. So it’s possible that she is making something for your son but isnt finished.
-maybe she thinks that at one he wouldn’t care or notice…or that hell outgrow too fast.
-maybe she thinks boys wouldn’t enjoy a handmade gift
-if your daughter’s birthday is coming up maybe that’s what it was for?

I’m not saying you’re wrong but it’s too early to tell if you’re right.

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If this is the first time something like this has happened, then no. But if it’s constant then yes. Hell sometimes I go to Walmart for certain things and always end up leaving with at least one new clothing item for one of my kids. I don’t always buy them all something new at the same time.

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I think you are overreacting a bit. She finished her project and sent it off.

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My mom’s on a fixed income so she spoils each grandbaby separately each month. This month is my son’s birthday so it’s his month. Next month is a different grand baby and so on. Just because one child gets one now and the other doesn’t doesn’t mean favoritism. I have 2 kids and sometimes one gets something and the other doesn’t. It happens.

Personally, just because I give something to one child, does not mean every child gets something. I try to keep things even by next time will be a gift for another child. Not the same child multiple times in a row. But with 4 kids here, they never all get something new at the same time. I would be broke.

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