Has anyone ever had their husband/wife join the military later in life? We are in our mid-twenties, been married for a little over a year but together for 6. We have a child together who will be starting school soon. My husband has told me he wants to join the military. I feel like this is completely going to change our lives, and I don’t know if it’s for the better or not? Does anyone have any insight? The good, bad, and ugly? Thank you.
I joined at the age of 26 with a toddler and my now ex wife was pregnant. It is life changing but I feel like it was a good life change for us. It really just depends on the family and if you guys can make it work. It comes with great benefits and a housing allowance which was definitely nice!
I’m a retired military wife. You can talk to me if you have questions
As a former military spouse with kids, I highly do not recommend this. And my ex-husband would tell you he agrees. But that is just our experience with it.
My husband joined at 30. No regrets. He retired and missed it so much.
My husband joined the military when our daughter was 1, and he was 21. We had a son and a daughter while he was active duty.
I think its a wonderful idea. Going into the military married, insures you get to live together after basic training and tech school. You will have that time without him for about the first year.
If you have a supportive family, it will fly by.
I recommend Air Force, deployments are usually fewer. Navy they spend alot of time on ship, and Marines and Army deal with a lot of deployment.
I am an Air Force veterans wife, ten years. We traveled many places, he made good money and loved every minute of it.
Just consider all the benefits which are good and also something barely people talk about, as it affects some people not all but some, depression, pstd, some can handle some others cant
And mainly if your husband is going means you will be by yourself long periods of times. Basic training is hard and no communication
My husband was 25 and it was the best decision we ever made. It gets hard and you definitely need to surround yourself with good people but there are so many benefits.
Maybe think about the moving you may have to do? I’m not sure how it works. Just thinking as far as your child and starting school. Moving. Etc. would be hard
I joined myself at age 26 with a husband and a 2 year old. I went in the reserves so not active duty. Which was my compromise to my husband. The military has a lot of great things to offer, but can definitely be a hard life to live. Maybe try to compromise and have him join reserves/national guard to get the feel of it. Then if both of you really like it, he can switch to active duty. But everyone either loves or hates the military so you’re going to get answers on complete opposite ends of the spectrum.
My husband is about to be getting out, he joined when he was around 25. We both agree that it was the best move for both of us in order to save money, have benefits, job security, etc. Its not easy but the pros outweighed the cons at the time. However, I grew up in a military family so it’s nothing that I’m not used to.
My husband just retired. Retirement is 100% worth it.
My husband was in the army from 2012 to 2019 and I personally wouldn’t recommend it to anyone with kids or that likes to see their friends and family. Me, my husband and our kids were relieved when he got out. Also, plan on moving a lot. And being alone a lot. Never really knowing when you’ll be able to visit home or when you’ll be able to plan pretty much anything. Also I really do not recommend it if you plan to have more children unless you’re okay with your husband missing the births. Between trainings and deployments… just a whole lot of nope from me. My step dad, grandfather, uncles, aunt, cousins, etc have all been military. So I had an idea of what to expect, but it’s completely different when it is your spouse. It’s rough. Very very rough. And my husband isn’t the same as he use to be either. He’s 100% different and that doesn’t make it easier either. It is rough and I honestly wouldn’t recommend it. I’m really glad that I got pregnant because I was suppose to be going into the army. And I feel like I dodged a bullet after living the life of just a spouse. I still worked during my husbands time in the army, but it was hard and I ended up changing jobs a lot too. We also have 7 children currently and pregnant with our 8th. I’m only just now being able to go back and finish nursing school too. Which is frustrating to me because I should have already been done.
Pros: He can get his college paid for, you get free health insurance and possible stipend for your housing allowance, there’s a great network/ support system of other military spouses. Cons: you move a lot, he probably won’t like his job and there’s nothing he can do about it, he may travel overseas or on deployment and you will be separated from him for long periods of time without communications. Also, if you go in as unlisted, the pay isn’t great. Do your research and make an informed decision. Some people love and and some people hate it.
This could make you guys a stronger couple or split up. It’s hard on kids. You will be moving every several years. Sometimes Navy can be on their ship or sub for 10 months at a time. I hear air force is easier on the family. You do get to see a lot of new places. Which is cool! But you will also have to make new friends. And it could be difficult to see family, especially with covid going on right now. I have not seen two of my brothers for a few years. And the other one that is luckily stationed on main land was able to visit a few months ago for a week. It was hard for him to get leave to visit. It will change your significant other a lot. Military wives can be a nightmare lol. Some are great. It’s also a stressful job. He will probably miss holidays, birthdays and special events.
There are a lot of cons. But there are a lot of pros too. It just depends on you guys and what you decide together. You are a family now. I have 3 brothers and an ex who are all active. I have 4 cousins who I used to be close with (until after bootcamp and training/school) who are out. They are ALL soooo different now. My ex and I have a son together. He lives across the country and his son doesn’t know who he is, but that is his own choice. Trying to keep in contact is hard. They are very busy.
My husband was in the marines 6 years . You can go with him and get military housing
as a military spouse for 18 years its not all bad just like any job or oil field jobs or any other traveling jobs has its up has its down
My husband of 4 years joined when he was in his early twenties midway through college. When we got together I was 26/27 and became a military wife at 28. He deployed two weeks after we got married. I had a hard time at first but it’s given us so many great benefits: I work from home part time so I can be with our daughter, he is finishing his degree and giving me some of his GI bill so I can get my masters, great healthcare, paid-for on post housing (or off with housing $$), reasonably priced child care, and most importantly a stable career. There are long days, deployments and it can get rough but if you have a good support system it’s not bad at all.
My husband is AGR (Active Guard Reserve) with the Guard. This is an awesome route to go. He would have to join a branch and work his way up a little bit then they have full time positions avaliable. We enjoy the many benefits of a military family (base pay, housing allowance, insurance, retirement) but have the stability of not having to move and uproot our family.
It was a great life for our family.