How can I explain to my child that someone is unsafe?

How do I explain an unsafe person to my child? My daughter’s father is not safe, anger issues and etc. How do I explain she is unsafe there? Any advice?


How old is she? Is there court ordered visitation?

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Depends on how old but u can seek help with a psychiatrist depending on how old your daughter is

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Why do you allow your daughter to go there if it is unsafe?! It makes no sense at all and makes you also “unsafe” as a parent. Also, NEVER put a parent down in anyway in front of a child especially if you are still letting her see him. If you in fact think he is unsafe, please seek legal advice from authorities for precautionary measures. :heart:


Just a guess… but I would assume she doesn’t go to her dads and the mom is trying to explain to her daughter why she doesn’t go there.


Daddy is a person that can hurt people, mummy doesnt want you seeing daddy because you might get hurt or scared and mummy doesnt want that


Depending on how old she is I would sit her down and break it down for her, don’t down him, just explain that daddy may not be in the best place right now and his actions may not be the best thing for her to be around right now
if you think he is unstable and dangerous and you have a court order contact the court and have an emergency hearing have it ordered that until he gets help (if needed) that he can’t see her or he has to have required visitation under the courts orders


I dealt with this ex husband. I actually had my childrens therapist take control of it. I didn’t want the kids relationship with their father to be ruined. But I wanted them to understand why they aren’t allowed to go to his house or go anywhere with him with out the supervisor for visitation. This definitely depends on the age also.


Daddy is not being the best daddy he can be right now and until he is Mommy just wants to keep you as safe as possible until circumstances change. Hope that helps and good luck

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You don’t say daddy is unsafe. You say people. She will plug the two together on her own.


We had to do this regarding my fiances ex…we put it into terms that not all people we may know are safe, some are dangerous and explained to them stranger danger isn’t just about strangers. (His ex was caught molesting a 14yr old and it has come out she has done it to multiple kids)

He’s sick and until he can go to the doctor to get better you can’t see him because I don’t want anything to ever happen to you!

That’s what I told my daughter about her father. He has anger management issues due to addiction issues

I use the words ‘tricky person’. You don’t want to say strangers because sometimes we rely on strangers like police and doctors. Tricky person can sometimes be a close relative. It’s a bad feeling.
Some children can’t explain emotions like anxiety and fear, but they may say they have a sore tummy, or chest hurts etc. Their bodies may be feeling ‘really fast’ or ‘really slow’. Look up zones of regulations. It explains emotions using colours which I think is great. It helps children to recognise and explain their emotions. This also helps with recognising uneasy feelings around certain people.
This graph is a great visual activity to do with children while explaining your inner circle and greater community


This is how I explained it to my kids when they were small. You know how we have to ask before we pet a dog, because sometimes they’re not safe to pet? Same with adults. Ask before you speak to a hug/whatever and adult because not all of them are safe to talk to/hug/whatever.
Keep it simple, don’t offer extra info. Only answer their questions as they come.

Find another way.
Go to court, get supervised visitation.
I understand your need, but it’s better to let the child figure that out for themselves…

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She will figure her father out on her own. Don’t put things in her head about her father. Unless a court has ordered he stay away then I suggest you watch what you say about her father or it will come back on you


Hey, so you know how sometimes people can do unsafe things or maybe they need time to fix themselves? Daddy may need some time so for now you can have fun with (insert name of supervisor) and daddy. Wouldn’t that be fun? As soon as it’s fixed, we will let you know and things will go back to how they were. Okay?

Dependent upon age I would look at story books.

If he has drug or alcohol problems you can blame it on that–that is what I told my grandkids when their father was in prison (he was actually a sociopath but did not want to explain that to them). Just that he had a problem with drugs and until he got better they could not see him even after he got out.

Talk to a therapist and take her to one as well. The best advice I ever got was from a therapist and she took all of my guilt away from having to keep my daughter away from her Dad when he wasn’t a healthy person to be around. He eventually got help as a result and doing great now and she was little. I don’t think she can even remember luckily. I know I just eventually was honest with my daughter and told her that her Dad was sick and that he could not be alone or drive with her that it was not safe for her.