I am involved in a divorce and because of drugs, criminal activity, child abuse and various other issues the father Was not awarded any custody or visitation agreement. Our child is a year and a half old and it has now been a couple weeks since he has seen his father…But he still wanders around saying daddy, he was looking at pictures on the wall and points at them and says daddy. It broke my heart and I took them down… I obviously plan to tell him about his father down the road, but it’s not anything I can explain to him right now because he’s so little. I guess I’m just wondering if anybody else in this situation can give me some insight on how to handle this. How long was it before he forgets about his dad? Like I said I don’t want to pretend like he never existed, I have every intention of showing him who he is and I made a scrapbook of some pictures that we have but is it selfish to just hide them all right now and want him to forget about him? Until I can better explain what happened?
If he wasn’t awarded visitation or custody, leave it be. It’s your job to protect your child, he can know about him when he’s older.
I would divert his attention to something else whenever his father is brought up or he asks about him. Just explain further down the road.
My ex moved to Florida when my son was about that age. I just told him daddy had to go away and i would redirect his attention to something else. He’s too young to really understand anything at this point.
In time your son will forget and not ask for daddy. When I left my ex the first time, my boys forgot who he was and wouldn’t go near him after a while. I had a restraining order on him so he couldn’t come near me or my boys.
You can say daddy is sick and won’t be around for a while. I had to do this with my son at a young age. Addiction is a sickness in a way. There’s alway time for the father to get better.
daddy is in the hospital getting better
I think you are trying to get at the psychological affects your child wil have by this traumatic experience? Mhmm, I think you should explain to your child, validate his emotions. Give him a picture of his father if he wants that. Let your toddler cope and go through the process without interferences.
My son was 15 months when his biodad and i split. In all fairness he wasn’t much of a father, more of a babysitter. He wasn’t all that upset…but we moved in with my mom. my grandma and mom babysat him while i worked. He really enjoyed that.
He’s 6 now. He doesn’t remember him. As far as he’s concerned my husband is his dad.
Just keep him distracted as best you can. Snuggle him twice as much. Don’t try to explain anything right now and don’t worry about how to explain it later on…you’ll just know when the time is right and you’ll have a better idea of how based on his age.
Same situation with us. My sons dad was into drugs, he was committing crimes, and he couldn’t be around our son anymore. He was 1 and a half. He’s now 10 and he just started asking about him.
I would explain it in a sense he’d more understand that daddy’s in a big boy time out and leave it at that
My daughter is 3. She’s never met or been around her dad due to him being an abusive drug addicted alcoholic. I moved states after he abused me for the last time. She asks about her daddy bc the kids in daycare have daddys. She’s seen pictures of him, aND knows him that eay, but that’s about it a lot of kids dad’s work so I just tell her he has to work far away for awhile and she’s ok with that.
I have been in this situation.i waited till she was 12 to give her details about why I kept her away . Before then I would just tell her it was in her best interest to not have him around .
Hes young enough that he will forget, I’d leave it be. Just wait until he is older to explain the situation.
Personally I would explain it in a way he can understand right now “daddy was bad and he had to go away”
I would tell him son dady is sick one day i hope with faith in god you could ser him.
My daughter’s father is a drug addict. He’s met her twice and lately, she’s been saying “daddy” a lot. I just plan on telling her, when she’s old enough to understand, that her dad had some problems, he’s sick, and that he had to go away in order to get better/for us to be safe.
“You must believe you can. You must find the place inside yourself where anything is possible. It starts with a dream. Add confidence, and it becomes a belief. Add commitment, and it becomes a goal in sight. Add action, and it becomes a part of your life. Add determination and time, and your dream becomes a reality. When you get in a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, Never Give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”
They never forget. Just be honest and there for them.
He’s too young to understand. At this point redirect his attention to something he likes.