How can I get my child to clean their room?

Going through this with my 8 year took everything from her room except games and it’s still a mess it’s so frustrating now there’s clothes strung everywhere we also live in a clean home I don’t get it

My daughter is so bad I could not see the floor. I found mold growing in bowls under the bed (she is not allowed to eat in her room) I have told her for months to clean her room and she would not do it, so I put the trash outside her window and threw EVERYTHING away! She has a bed a blanket some clothes and shoes in there and that is it. Anything on her floor before bed gets thrown away and now she knows I am not kidding.


Take everything out except her bed and dresser and don’t give it back for a while. Then when she wants her stuff back make her agree that she will clean her room when asked. Give back her stuff. If she doesn’t hold up to her word take it all out again and keep it for longer.

The messy room seems like a symptom and you need to get to the root of the problem with her.


Alot of kids get overwhelmed with the space of an entire Room. Especially nuro divergent children and adults.
It’s eaiser to follow a checklist.
Pintrest has many, some more detailed then others .
Pick one you think will work. Also as long as it’s not food trash give him them a little bit of their own space and if it is a little messy shut the door.
This is what a councilor told me amd my mother when i was younger.
I Also help Do a deep Clean, reorganize and donate during fall before all the holidays .


My daughter is going on 11 years old and it’s a constant battle here as well. She literally acts like we’re asking for an arm or a leg. But I think it’s helped that my husband (step dad) has given her the opportunity to do her thing until Friday. He doesn’t care but when Friday night comes, when he gets home from work, he inspects her room. And if it’s a horrible mess… she is to clean it. But usually with her understanding the expectation that’s coming on Friday, she doesn’t destroy her bedroom like usual. We’re not expecting perfection, just not a dumpster that she’s got the ability to create. Idk if this helps? Good luck!

I struggle to get my daughter to keep her room clean. Then I’ll get so sick of looking at it that I go in and clean it and organize it myself. I also go through and donate things I know she’s no longer interested in or outgrown.

But when I do get her to clean it I give her rewards for keeping it clean. Right now she’s got to keep it clean everyday for two weeks to earn a new phone. Or I’ll do a night where she can choose a place for us to go eat together at or some money for something for herself. She looks forward to the reward.

Put some little black flower seeds on the floor​:joy::joy:and tell them it’s mouse droppings :woman_shrugging::joy:


Speaking of cleaning anyone have any tips on how to get a toddler to clean up aka put their stuff away? It’s more so the toys, he is like a little tornado takes everything out and doesn’t want to put them back :slightly_smiling_face: 3.5 year old

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Find her currency to keep it clean

My niece was like this she was 9 at the time we did this : you bag absolutely everything except furniture garbage included. Make them earn each bag back like an allowance one a week … one bag may be junk another may be something they want… they don’t keep what they earn back clean in their room you take another bag back until they learn to respect their space.

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I was the same way as a child, but where it looked like a mess to everyone else, it was an organized mess for me. I still don’t even keep the clothes on my dresser folded, although I keep my kids dresser neat and organized, and I fold their clothes and put them up when I do laundry.

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An empty room = a clean room. Start throwing everything away and just leave the bed. 🤷

Help her keep it clean and tidy. My daughter and I clean tidy and Hoover the whole house together she’s a great help. I turn things into a game too like throw her soft toys see if she can catch them to put them away etc. Not sure if this has just happened or not. If it has maybe something’s going on in her life at school etc try having a chat with her see if she needs to get anything off her chest? I also pay my daughter for doing chores. She’s only 4 but give her £1 and she knows she can spend it how she wants, it might be a ride or sweets or a toy a book etc but she looks forward to when she goes and picks her treat

Good luck! Let her be, hopefully, she’ll grow out of it! Close the door, don’t allow her to bring friends in her mess. It’s probably a constant issue with her & a huge frustration, is it worth the headache???

We have a chore chart. Currently my kids are doing school from home so on lunch break the beds get made and they tidy up what they can. After school the rest of the cleanup is done and they aren’t allowed any tv or tablets unless rooms are clean. I remember my
Mom always upset about my room when I was younger too :joy: I just don’t understand how they can clean them after school and by bed time they are a wreck again :woman_facepalming:t3:

Im a mom of 4. I do not have chore charts only because they don’t work for me. I say what I want done on that day and thats what gets done. My youngest daughter is beyond messy and drives me nuts with it. she is 11. She is a “collecter” of what I call garbage. She doesn’t see it as that. I heave ho her room out every so often of the ridiculous things when she isn’t home. She will organize any room in the house except her own. She has OCD,ODD,ADHD, and they are looking into bi polar. She is in therapy. I noticed someone else had said messy room is a symptom. I don’t entirely disagree but I do partially because of attention spans. She is pure lazy when it comes to her room. She is fully capable but refuses and doesn’t want to do it. She doesn’t have much left in her room as I have gotten rid of a huge chunk of things. My 13 and 14 year old do pretty well when I tell them to clean up their room. My 2 year is getting pretty awesome with cleaning. He likes to clean with me but not by himself just yet. Each kid is different. I don’t expect them to be the same. I’m just trying to raise them to being functional independent clean individuals who don’t live in filth.

Minimise her room. Bed or mattress with basic bedding, enough clothes for 1 week (uniforms, 3 sets yard clothes 1 set of good, 1 or 2 pjs, and swimmers) and no more. Remove all toys, electronics, etc. If she doesn’t respect it, she doesn’t have it. Store it all away and if she really wants something she will earn it. Like she has to do x amount of chores, keep her room clean and tidy for x amount of time etc. She only gets one item at a time. When she has to earn what she has, she will appreciate it. No slip ups or she looses it all again.


Remove everything! Leave the bed, dresser and a couple days of clothes. If she wants the privilege of toys and extra things then she will show respect of your house. She can earn back items one at a time! If she leaves them out take them away again. 4 kids, done this with all of them. It works. Just stay strong, don’t give in!