How can I get my toddler to be okay with not being rocked at bed time?

I have a question! I have two children under 2. my oldest still gets rocked to sleep. But with my husband going back to work and having a newborn, I don’t think I will be able to keep this routine. How do I get her comfortable with just being laid down in bed? Currently, we do bath, milk, and rock to sleep. If we just lay her down awake, she freaks out and screams. Help!!!


Ferber method of sleep training. Seriously works.


I used to to rock my son to sleep until one day when he was super tired I just laid him in his bed and patted his back rubbed his head until he would fall asleep. Also maybe its time to add reading to your nightly routine

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I’m gonna sound like a jerk but as a mama of four I say… Rock that baby as long as you possibly can get away with. It goes SO FAST and before you know it…


Ask him if he’d like some music! I had a child friendly music box with a projector and my son loved it!

Maybe try cutting down the amount of rocking time by just a little bit at a time time?

So if you normally or currently rock for say 15mins maybe start by only rocking for 13 minutes. Then do that for a couple days and go down to 11 minutes(just as an example whatever amount of time or whatever works for you)

That way its not so drastic and abrupt for him and you can have a set end goal so you can feel better about managing it all.

Hang in there your doing a great job!

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Been there! After I threw my back out lifting my sleeping 3 year old I started sitting in her room with her while she fell asleep. Sometimes I would put my hand on her leg or hold her hand, sometimes she wants me to hum “her song”. Then I started taking small moves towards the end of the bed, not really touching her anymore but still in the room. Eventually I moved to a chair in the room, then in the hallway and finally she could fall asleep by herself. It took about a month but it was worth it and it was an easier transition then crying and tantrums and then an over all fear of her room. Good luck mama!!


I won’t lie, my girl is 5 and she is the last of 5, the oldest is 19. We was still putting her to bed with lullibies and lay with her until she falls asleep. Her dad and I worked 50 + hours a week so that was our time. I just recently got laid off and bedtime is hard because I am taking this time to help her grow and change her routine. I suggest starting small . if you have never heard the little snowman "snowflake " song. Try it. It is like the baby whisper song. :joy:No lie I put it on in her room with a color changing light and so far it hs worked 2 weeks in a row. It will be hard on you and the little in this transition but you got this mama!!

Get one new swings moved ele.rock the baby and keep it sleeping with musice.

I have twin grand sons. So hard to rock them. I lay one on my lap to watch TV and one beside me touching me and they will go down like that

I know it sucks but just lay her down and let her learn to self soothe…go in every 10 mins if she’s crying and give love and then say goodnight and walk back out. It only takes a few days of hell for them to catch on.


My oldest 2 are 13 months apart … hell, my oldest wasn’t even 3 yet when my third was born. I made routines that included them all, the older ones being helpers along the way. It’s amazing how much your lap can hold. Rock them both. Have a swing or some other holder (I had a pack n play with a bassinet attachment) near by to switch out. If the newborn will lay down, take advantage and rock your older one and vice versa. Read books to make the routine wind down and bond. Even setting on the floor next to their bed and reading to them too. My oldest ones are now my best sleepers! Don’t make your oldest grow up too fast. They’re still a baby yet too, just a little older!


I know it’s hard mama but I went thro the same thing. I had to let mine scream. Every ten minutes I’d go back in there say I love you night night lay them back down and after 3 very tiring nights of that they started just not screaming. It’s hell but we are all mom’s and we are strong I wish there was an easier way :frowning:

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Your oldest isn’t even 2…I agree w/the one poster who said to put the baby in a swing & keep the routine w/your toddler. You don’t want the toddler to resent the baby.


If you have a baby swing, put the baby in the swing and rock the toddler because they are still babies at this stage and still learning. this is a common debate called nature vs nurture in child psychology, and your 1 year old still needs to have your attention to promote a positive relationship as well as a trusting and loving one.


My daughter use to be the same. Have a melt down and even vomit. So Id put her to bed and rub her back for the 1st few nites then the time got shorter and I’d just sit beside her so she knew I was there (u could do that with your new born) after few nites got a chair and sat in room and slowly sat on chair moving it away fm her bed till she was fine. Day 3 or 4 was the hardest. And try wee nite light

Put her to bed and stop rocking her, she’s going to scream or cry for a couple of days but don’t give in and she’ll get used to it

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Rock as long as possible.The baby won’t remember but the 2 year old will be hurt. They grow up so fast.

Create a new routine…encourage blankie love, and repeat. Night 3 or 4 it won’t be as bad. Consistency is key!! Dont cave! Same thing with the bottle. My oldest cried for it for 3 days…4th never mentioned it again :woman_shrugging:

Let her scream :woman_shrugging:t3:it’ll take a couple days or so but she’ll figure out it’s okay. We used to have to pat our kids back until he fell asleep. I stopped doing that just before a year. Let him cry a little and now he goes to sleep great.

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