How can I help my child grieve over the loss of his grandma?

My two year old lost his great-grandma first of this year. He was one then and starting talking. We saw her 3/4 times a month since he was a week old. Now he doesn’t talk or say the words he did before. There’s a lot of pointing and grunting, no words. He has a picture of them together and won’t let anyone touch it, takes it to bed sometimes or naps or puts their picture on the floor and plays their picture. Lately has been sleeping with the blanket grandma had in the nursing home. I talked to his Dr when he turned two and was told he needs a grieving period. I did take him to see her headstone and take her flowers, he took their picture and was showing her the flowers and the toy he brought. Is there more I need to do to help him. Breaks my heart seeing him hurting so much.

74 Likes

The best way to help him is your way.

1 Like

My son was about 4 when my Grammy passed away and my daughter was 8 months. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do was explain to my son why Grammy wasn’t there anymore when we had Sunday dinners. I made sure We still talked about her a lot, I told him that she was our angel in heaven now. I keep lots of pictures of her in the house and we visit her headstone as well. On her angel day every year we release (biodegradable) balloons ( on amazon) and there faces light up when we do this. My son was old enough to realize I was grieving and would hug me whenever he saw me cry. He would say “ you miss Didi?” So he understood. I glad that we continue to talk about her. My daughter who doesn’t remember her knows her from her pictures. It does take time for little ones to get used to the fact that they are not there, but I reassure them that even though we cant see them anymore, they are always in our heart. Hope this helps and I’m sorry for your loss :heart:

3 Likes

My sons grandpa passed almost 2 years ago. He is having a really hard time with this. We had to get him a therapist to talk to. He would say things like I wish I could die so I could see grandpa again. He is 8. It is very hard when someone they are close to passes. Just keep doing what you are doing. It takes time it sounds like you are doing everything right momma hang in there.

5 Likes

My girls lost their Grandpa when they were only 3 and 4. My son was yet to be born, but he knows who Grandpa is. They were allowed to say goodbye that was the biggest thing. We sat them down and explained death and we have a beautiful painting of my dad fishing, we told them that’s where he is fishing in heaven. We also had them go through grief counseling. They speak of my dad freely and often :heart: We just added a memorial stone in our garden for him as well. hopefully that helps… Sorry for your loss :heartpulse:

2 Likes

My son lost his father when he was almost 3 years old. We have always kept him in holidays, celebrate his birthday, talk about him whenever he wants, sometimes he cries and says how much he wishes he still hax his daddy. He will be 9 this year. He went through some phases for sure. Not long after it happened he had a lot of fits, screaming, crying, throwing toys…now he’s the sweetest boy I’ve ever met. I think time does heal some of the pain then some of it never heals. I had a blanket made for him that is covered in pictures of him and his dad and he has slept with it every single night.

5 Likes

When my Dad passed my Niece and Nephews took comfort in sending a balloon to the sky to say bye to their Grandad…We now refer to the stars as Grandad star…It seemed to help them…They were a similar age to your son when he passed…That was nearly 5yrs ago…We still say Grandad star and when they see a bright star they say its Grandad…:sparkles::sparkler::sparkles: xx

1 Like

I sadly can be no help. I am so very sorry for your loss. But please, if you don’t already, have a copy/take a good photo of the picture. And laminate the one he has now. If it isn’t already done. I’d hate for him to lose it. Or get it ruined. :heart: best of luck! I hope he feels better soon poor bud.

5 Likes

Made my gut clench and my eyes water, my girls see their great grandma/grandpa 2-3times a week they are 2&3yrs old and have done so since birth. Hold that baby boy I can’t even imagine. Let him know grandma is happy and watching him play all the time maybe keep the blanket around as much as possible let him know grandma loves to see him happy, I may play into things a bit much but he is 2 if you believe in heaven explain that grandmas their and God needed her

You need to start talking to her and get him talking to her. If his bond was strong with her you have to believe she’s still around.

I was like that when my grandpa passed when I was about 5, I was his favorite. I stopped talking to people even in school & just cry out of nowhere. I remember my parents just trying to talk to me about many fun things, got me toys, took me outside to play. I can’t remember how long I was in that state but it will pass & I guess it is normal for kids to go through that kind of grieving. Just talk to him, be his comfort & be around him all the time.

Sorry for your loss. Sounds like you and he are doing all the right things to help him get over his loss. We all grieve in our own ways and for different lengths of time. Explain to him best that you can for his age that death is a natural part of the circle of life and that we believe we will all see our loved ones again some day.

I’ve been explaining death to my oldest daughter since she was 2. Ever since our dog ate our fish lol

I tell her the truth. I tell her what I believe. Everyone and everything has a time when it dies and their soul goes to heaven, but their body stays. Its the circle of life, but circles never end and we will see them again.

2 Likes

Maybe make a pillow with one of her shirts? A custom blanket with her picture? That’s so sad he feels that much at such a young age. What an amazing child

1 Like

We explained that my dad went to God’s house. My oldest is 6 and she will send messages to him through God. We just let them feel their emotions and let them know it is ok to feel that way. Sorry for the loss

Slumberkins has an adorable little sprite stuffed animal with a book about grief and loss that I think would help! :two_hearts:

bless his little heart

That is lovely Jayne xxxxx

I am so sorry for you loss my son lost both of his sisters before he was 3 and we just lost his grandma my husband and I have always told him the truth on all of his questions he knows that they live with the angels and god

My Grandpa died when I was two. I have strong memories of how I felt still. Most ask me how I can even remember. Just give him love and time. Talk about her and have happy memories.