How can I make going to daycare less stressful to my child?

Hi ladies, my 3 yr old recently started daycare. The first week was fine, well, the first few days, then it became world war 3 in my house, and she decided no, she did not want to go! What did you guys do to help ease the process? I feel like I am a helicopter mom. I call about an hour after drop off to see if she is okay; I don’t wanna be extra cause she hey she is okay and playing with other kids! any tips?!?


My daughter is now 21. She went to the same sitter for 3 years. For 6-8 months she would cry every day we dropped her off. Pretty soon she was all good. I am still friends with this sitter.

1 Like

Ask her about the friends she makes. Get her excited to go there to be around them. Ask what she learned. Make it a big deal so she wants to go learn more stuff and come home and tell you about it

Just relax. It takes time to adjust to it all and some kids take longer than others to get use to it. Just continue to take her and reassure her that you will be picking her up later that day.

I used to have my own day home; parents would give hugs and try talking to child. Sometimes 10 to 20 minutes.
About 5 minutes after the parent would leave child is smiling and playing.
Had to put on a good show for Mom.
I would take pictures throughout the day showing what we were doing.
We had a pretty regular schedule and I always talked with the children about what we were going to do each day.
I had a wonderful group of children ages 6 months to 5 years.
I love it and the children.


Mom… take a breather. She’s fine. You sound like myself when my daughter was in kindergarten. I volunteered for everything to be near her and guess what? She didn’t need me. Sometimes our anxiety is what they feel too. The anxiety is real and I feel ja, but breath.

Worked in daycare. This is actually really common with 2s and 3s. The faster the drop off the quicker the recovery for your baby. Within mintues they are playing. It’s called putting on a show by most care givers. Lol

1 Like

I don’t know, it makes me wonder why she would be fine the first couple days and then all of a sudden not like the idea at all. I’ve heard horrible stories from daycares in the news and have witnessed things from also working at one. I don’t know, it’s suspicious to me.

My boy is 2.5, I had to keep myself crazy busy and force myself not to call :sweat_smile: I had my phone on loud, and knew they’d call if anything happened. He started one daycare, but didn’t settle well, as he got sick alot, so I pulled him out for Christmas, and ended up visiting a few others, and chose to put him in another daycare, where his best mate went, and he’s loved every minute, as soon as we get there, it’s bye mum, and when I pick him up, he never wants to leave. :heart:

Make it sound fun on the way there. They will play with other people, give a task of make something today like a sand caste or drawing. At the door of the room do kiss, cuddle, goodbye and leave. Don’t drag it out make it as fast as possible. As once you are gone she will go play after a couple mins and be fine. Dragging it out makes it alot harder

It’s called the “honey moon stage” it’s super new and exciting then reality kicks in it’s gonna be a every day thing and that’s when the anxiety/fear/tears come in. Be very consistent when dropping off, learn the schools routine explain you will do XYZ then I will be there to pick you up. Watch Daniel tigers “grown ups come back” also don’t linger when dropping off it makes it harder when they struggle with drop offs. What do they say when you call after a hour?

1 Like

Both my kids went through this phase it’s pretty normal , 9/10 timea there fine 5 minutes after u have left.

I worked days my husband worked nights. 3 kids. No daycare…ever.


I wouldn’t even make a big deal of going to daycare for her. Just get up and get ready with her. Don’t react to her and just get her ready to go. Don’t work her up or anything. Just let her get upset and mad and after a week or so she will do better. My toddler isn’t even 2 yet and hasn’t fought me at the house, but did fight me leaving when I was dropping her off. I just had to not prolong it and give her a quick kiss and let her go


If it was a nice place to be she would want to go there…


I bribed mine with a sweet. Small daycare, luckily, as all the kids wanted one. The other moms contributed. Was so worth seeing little faces light up. It didn’t take long for my boy to stop so the sweets didn’t continue.

Have you asked why she doesn’t like it?
It could also be a sign your child is trying to tell you something


If she did fine at first and now she’s having really bad fits, maybe something isn’t right about the daycare, pay attention,


Do random pop ups, try and volunteer when you can to see what’s going on (if they allow) also might just want to give her time to adjust. If you aren’t sure about that specific day care try looking to enroll her in another one to see if the place is the issue or if she just doesn’t want to go to daycare. It’s good for their social skills and they learn a lot instead of being stuck in the house all day

1 Like

My little one started daycare at 2. I was a wreck for the first couple of days but she was so excited to play and be with other kids. She had a stuffed animal that she always took with her(and I mean everywhere lol). After the first day they wanted her to put it in her cubby until nap time and then she could sleep with it. She got extreamly upset when it was time to put up her “baby”, but after a bit she got used to how things went there and was fine afterwards.

About a year went by and we were involved in a major motor vehicle accident and I was off work for over 6 months. Well, a few weeks after the accident covid hit and she stayed with me for awhile. After returning to daycare she had big fits before we would leave and scream and cry and not want to go. It again took a few weeks and she was fine. Now I stay in the classroom for a few minutes to help her get situated and she is ready to play and learn.

Maybe try sending a favorite toy or blanket that they like, something that smells like home. Maybe ask if it is ok to stick around for a few minutes and then duck out when the child is occupied. If you have time maybe you can volunteer for an hour a week and help the kids in their class make a snack or craft. Lol sorry for the long post, but itll get better :slight_smile: maybe they just need time to make friends and get use to the teachers/adults there. I would just mention it to daycare and let them know that you’re having a hard time getting them to want to go and maybe they have some advice. Good luck!!

1 Like