Girl day. Salon. Spa. Food.
You are doing great! How’s her diet? Hormones are responsible for a lot of mood problems. Eating clean foods can help. Plenty of water ext. My daughter eats crap and feels the same. We’re working on it.
Go get your nails done have a girls day every once in awhile. Do your guys makeup together if you own your house you could buy her some paints and let her do mural (aka painting on her wall) go shopping. Good luck mama
I mean if she really has depression it will never really go away. You learn coping methods and you maybe take medication.
Prayer.prayer will see her thru
I’d look for some books on Amazon that are in her age group and are uplifting but are also talk about keys points as a girl her age. I found a very cool one for my cousin turning 13 and kind of wished I’d had it when I’d turned 13 lol
I wrote a list of things I love about my daughter and taped it in her mirror. She had to say the things to herself every morning after brushing her teeth. She felt silly at first but just hearing herself say positive things about herself out loud helped a lot
Aswell as telling her that she’s beautiful etc, Give her compliments on things that aren’t based on looks. Tell her how she’s so kind and she’s a great friend, She can do anything she sets her mind to etc. Fresh air, Getting up and dressed, Putting on a bit of perfume or body spray etc whichever she has, Set her up to do some activities she enjoys, Get her some new drawing stuff if your budget allows it, Little things that might just give her a pick me up. The better she feels the more she’ll want to do… If you think a perm will help her… Go for it.
Vitamin d could be low maybe have her vitamin levels checked along with her hormones
Horse riding lessons…this really boosts self confidence. Takes great patience and strength to learn to guide a large animal to where you want…I did this for my girls and it’s amazing the results…I highly recommend this!
Make sure she is getting enough exercise. Daily walks and yoga would help.
As someone else with curly hair who doesn’t want to spend a lot of time: Schwartzcoff leave in conditioner. Three quick spritzes. As to being depressed, we all are! Lots of that is just teenagehood. Hormones and moodiness. Sunlight and fresh air. Maybe something to draw herself out of herself. Volunteer work at an animal shelter, somewhere she can feel she makes a difference.
Depression doesn’t just disappear, talk therapy and/or medication will help
If she has friz in her hair. Use a dryer sheet and rub it down to help ease the frizz. It really works
Maybe she needs something that’s not “superficial” such as doing community work.
Get her involved with the local animal shelter, visit a senior center, dish out lunch to the homeless.
Making an impact on people’s lives is a very good esteem booster & kids can make huge differences when given the opportunity to shine
Maybe a new wardrobe?!
Try an individual sport like karate gymnastics dance it did wonders for my kids we did karate for the longest ATA has a good program and we had some good female role models to look up to
My daughter suffers as well. She is 15. Such the sweetest self less little girl. But she has Low self esteem, anxiety depression. It’s pretty bad. She is on meds (I fought that at first because I don’t want her dependant on them) but eventually if she wants to stop she can. She is in therapy and also attends a weekly prp group session with other kids her age in the neighborhood who have similar issues. Sometimes it helps to be around people like you. Who deal with the same issues as you. It’s so hard. Especially when you are a teenager.
You gotta learn the balance of when to push and when not to. I understand because I’ve had it since.o was a teen
All of it. And knowing what I know… helps me help her.
Best of luck.
My 12-year old daughter went through this with Covid. I took her to ped. Her ViT D was super low. She was put on a Rx Vitamin D. Ped encouraged her to stay on routine - getting up/going to bed at same time, eating regular meals & exercise. My daughter told the ped things she didn’t tell me. I’m not sure if your daughter is learning virtual or in-person, but many of my daughter’s insecurities seemed to fade once she went back to in-person. It is wonderful that you are seeing her behavior and recognizing the need for change. As women we spend WAY too much of our lives feeling small. Your advocacy and support will help her build healthy habits!
Have her tackle difficult tasks just a bit past her comfort zone to give her a sense of accomplishment. You can start out helping her but it needs to be mostly her doing for her to feel it is her accomplishment. My daughter had an awesome Girl Scout troop leader and they did some amazing things, and she made lifelong friends. See if this is an option.
Enroll her in a fun class where she can excel, especially if there are no grades, ranking or competition to see who’s “best.” Maybe a computer class so she can be the expert in the family, a musical instrument, modern dance or improvisation class to give her an outlet for her emotions. Martial arts can often boost self esteem, self respect and give a sense of accomplishment and power to those who may feel powerless.
As stated above, exercise and outdoor time helps everyone. Also, ask her therapist for ideas. Make sure she knows where to find the number of a crisis hotline in case she needs to talk to someone when her therapist is not available.
Do you know this is such a common problem it’s why Take Our Daughters to Work Day was started? Make sure she has strong female role models in her life she can talk with, & read books and watch videos, shows and movies about women who overcame obstacles. Hidden Figures might be a good one, also Harriet. There are now buildings named for the women in the former, and hopefully soon we will have the latter on our money. Tell her every time she has one of those Tubman $10 bills in her hand to think of gaining courage and strength from her.
Have her recite a mantra every day about her being, smart, strong, brave, accomplished, kind, etc. I know there’s video of a dad doing this with his little girl online if you need ideas.