How can I make my husband understand that I need his help?

What do I do/say to my husband? We have two small children, and he works all day (as do I), but the second he’s done working, he starts playing video games on his laptop until our older child goes to bed. Every other night after our older child goes to bed, I go to bed alone, and he stays up very late playing video games. Sure he helps intermittently with parenting, but he’s unavailable for talking to me or helping very much. I’ve expressed that I don’t like this at all, and it’s not making a difference. What do I do?!

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Disconnect the internet

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Show him that there are consequences for his actions

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Walk out with the damn video game that will get his attention…

Tell him your having a girls night out and leave

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Ive been there n still am there sadly…my s/o doesnt even work at the moment…ive tried all of the above suggestions n still have gotten no where…im really growing tired of it myself…i feel like im not heard or a priority to him cuz everything an everyone comes b4 me…i wish i had some sort of secret advise but like u im at a loss on wut to do :sleepy:

Just leave make dinner dates with friends. When he complains let him know you need someone to talk too. You need a break too.

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My heart aches for you. I’m sure it feels quite lonely and overwhelming and unequal. I would recommend hiring a sitter and making dinner reservations if your community has allowed restaurants to remain open. It’d be neutral ground and also he’d have to step away from the Xbox or PlayStation for a bit. You two could focus on your marriage–on the two of you. You could suggest a compromise to him, like scheduling his game nights a few nights a week, and also schedule a few nights a week where he will watch the kids while you do something for you–yoga, wine and paint night with your besties, etc. I hope something like that helps.

Sounds like he has no love or need for you or children…get a hint

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Tell him this is why women leave their husbands

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Leave him with the kids, take the game console, the router and go out for you time

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You are already a single parent. Dump him.

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He is obviously not choosing you or your children… He is checking out of real life and his responsibilities as a father and husband. I am sure he has many excuses such as he works all day in a physical way and needs to decompress or is to tired or whatever… Make him understand you don’t need him but that you are still trying to choose him. Continue doing it yourself for any amount of time that you choose and are comfortable with, inform him of this action before you start your countdown. If things don’t change on his end by then end of the time frame set keep doing it yourself without him altogether. You seem to try to want to include him but he chooses other ‘priorities’. Stand up for what you need and require in your relationship, if he can’t supply these things you are better off without him.

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Go out to dinner once a week or so with friends. Leave him the responsibility of getting the kids dinner and bed that night. But mutually pick the night that works best for you both. Then pick a date night at home, one night a week, where you both watch a movie, spend some alone time. Even if it has to be after the kids go to bed. If he can’t agree to that then I’d say tell him and his laptop to get out.

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Tell him if you both can’t work AND do house stuff, then you will quit your job and do house stuff 24/7. He can get a second job to make up the difference. Obviously thats what he wants right ?? You to do 100% of the house stuff, so he can’t do 100% of the money stuff. Sounds fair to me.

Sounds like you married a child.

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I recorded him playing video games and told him I’m sending it to his mom, then he went from playing all night and working all day ( from home(which means he played all day too) to quitting cold turkey!! I’d give it time it will pass!

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Unfortunately most men don’t help

I am not a quitter type person, trust me I put up with more than I should have for 16 years but I’m telling you, he will not change. As much as you want him to, unless he wants to, he will not.

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Put the kids to sleep and then stand in front of the dam TV naked

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