How can I talk to my friend about her sons behavior?

I need to talk to a friend of mine about her son’s behavior around my daughter WITHOUT sounding like I’m accusing her son of doing anything wrong. He’s six, and my daughter is four, so they’re young kids. But I don’t like how he plays with my kid. He keeps pinning her to the ground to play fight but not letting her up when she says to get off her, grabbing her from behind to tackle her, grabbing her roughly, and talking about how she should have a boyfriend and stuff. I’m not even sure if HE knows what an actual boyfriend/girlfriend is. Today he tried to follow her into the bathroom. I mean, is this normal behavior for a six-year-old kid? I don’t know. My four-year-old is my oldest, and she’s not in public school, and I’m not sure if the public school has anything to do with his behavior. I’m not even sure what I’m asking. I don’t want to just drop my friend because of her son’s behavior cause it’s hard as hell to make mom friends. But I also can’t sacrifice my kid’s safety so I can have a friend.

45 Likes

You just need to flat out bring it up that behavior needs to be snipped in the ass ASAP

You know it’s okay to say something to the 6 year old right? You don’t have to directly speak to the parent. Just use your words carefully and make them meaningful.

24 Likes

Some discussions can’t be sugarcoated.
She may get offended but I can almost guarantee if she doesn’t address this she’ll get more complaints from school or parents of other playmates.
Your daughter comes above this adult’s feelings.

10 Likes

Say something! Goodness, poor girl.

3 Likes

Also on top of it a bad influence will affect you child . Especially with associated toughness . I say control the situation and express then take a break from her or just once in a bit. I am telling you those kids rub off on others

1 Like

His behavior isn’t normal. What is his mom doing/saying when this is happening? She needs to make sure he learns boundaries and limits.

11 Likes

Follow your instincts. Find a new friend.

4 Likes

Being honest and upfront is key.

4 Likes

Speak up lady thats your baby

3 Likes

Don’t leave them unsupervised and when he’s rough or out of line, call him on it. Ex: If he tackles her, tell him she’s too little, he can hurt her.

4 Likes

His behaviour sounds odd…is he overly affectionate to any adults ?

4 Likes

I don’t care who kid it is or how old he is… If my daughter is being basically bullied but not knowing it I’m going to speak up That’s not okay and if your friend is your real friend she will understand it and correct her son

3 Likes

The OP isn’t teaching their son much about being a gentleman.

Speak to your friend, everyone parents differently just be open cc

Children mimic behavior especially from parents. Not saying this is the case but just keep that in mind.

Say something to him front of her. Like if he follows your daughter to the bathroom say no why dont you stay over here so she can have her privacy or if he’s pinning her down and she’s trying to get up tell him to let her up now and maybe explain when she wants you off that means you need to get off. Hopefully your friend will catch on and start handling it, if not you can address it with her right there.

15 Likes

Definitely say something. Me being me id have politely stopped the little boy and asked him to stop doing that to my daughter its inappropriate and she doesnt like it. If the mother of the boy has a problem with this then shes not worth having as a friend.

2 Likes

Theyre kids. Just next time the kids are playing just ask him to be more careful. Just explain to him that shes younger and she doesnt like playing rough like that.

1 Like

You don’t want that going further in the future. Speak up for your daughter, and teach her how to defend herself against boys like him. As for his mother tell her her son is being highly inappropriate with his behavior. If she doesn’t like what you say? Cut ties.