I’m just wondering how other parents deal with the stress and how to go about the opposite parent telling the children lies and bullcrap to make them look better than the other? We’ve been apart for seven years and are currently in court figuring out a new custody plan, due to drugs and bad parenting on their side… but him and his wife continue to tell the children nonsense things that make me look like the worst person in the world every single weekend they actually show up to get them.
Cognitive brain therpoy for your self .
Learn different ways to change your negitive thoughts from bad situations to positive thoughts on how to deal with stupid people .
I’ve had to do it after epic descusting break up n it’s been best thing for me for parenting apart from father and life in general.
Takes out all the he said she said drama that’s clogging up that strate thinking part of your brain .
I would bring it up in court. Depending on the kids aging they can tell the judge. They do I found out have it where it’s a rule no parent bashing infront of or to the children. That is really childish. If you have to maybe record it if it ever happens infront of you but I would definitely bring it up to the judge. You don’t need to be dealing with that.
Depending on the child’s age they probably know the other parent is full of crap . My mom kept her mouth shut about my dad growing up and I figured out he was worthless on my own before I was 10. Kids know who’s there and who takes care of them. Keep your head up
Documentation helps, to bring forward in future court proceedings and possibly add a “no bashing” (essentially) clause in the parenting order.
Document, smile and realize that sooner or later your kids will realize the truth. Dont stoop to thier level and try to keep contact in writing ( text, email, messenger). Dont argue with them just say yes, no or fine… The kids will realize the truth so be the bigger person and document everything (pick up drop off time, missed visits, time visits, any contact, what time and why, etc,)
Kids are really smart and they have a radar that is spot on. They get it.
Dont worry about it what goes around comes around. You send prayers for them to stop and do the right thing.Ask God and your angels/guides for assistance. Your children will know you love them and did your best as their mother. You stay a strong loving person,what you put out will come back for you.
Go get your kids tell cort what you say now.they are not capable of caring for your kids stop it now!MOM🌹YOU GOT DZ🌹
Just clear it up with your children and they will start not trusting lies. Actions speak louder, they will see what’s real or not soon.
Sometimes just taking a breath. Cry for 10 mins . Do what you need to do for you to get back in the game. Your kids will see who is there for them and who is not. Just keep being strong . It’s hard and it sucks but just remember your awesome and keep loving yourself and your babies.
You can’t let that get to you. The thing you have to remember is they are lying, and the kids will realize it at some point. Don’t feel like this is a competition, you do what the kids need and they will respect you for it when it matters. Good luck!
Bring these things up in court. Other than that I dont know what else you could do.
Just stay strong to who you are. Your goodness will show. Don’t bad mouth back just keep you’re shoulders high. You can’t control what others say or do but you can.
If your kids say to you…dad/mum said this… You can just say oh that’s a shame. Or say thank you for telling me and change the subject.
I hope this helps. X
Ignore it …be the bigger person…your kids will realize on their own the truth…
Record what the kids say. Try to get a recording of them saying it. It’s actually slander
There needs to be a court order for in your custody agreement that neither parent can disparage the other to -or in hearing range- of the minor children. Lots of custody agreements have that rule. My husband has to have it put in place because his ex wife would call him ‘white trash’ in front of their children. Also this is manipulative behavior that needs to stop, please research Parental Alienation and start keeping records of any communication and behavior that is cruel, uncalled for and combative. This means that you need to start keeping a close eye on your temper and inner peace. You may need to know this stuff and have it handy for future court disagreements. What helped me was support groups for Parental Alienation, support groups for people who are healing from dealing with Narcissistic abuse and diving into meditation and self healing. It’s all about being the bigger person and protecting yourself and your children mentally and emotionally. Good luck Mama.
I have never told my son what a piece of shit his dad is. I have never had to. He has figured it out on his own. I made sure my son knew by the age of 5 that his dad was ordered to pay child support every month and that money was for my son so he gets a portion of that money in his own account to buy whatever he wants. So if his dad doesn’t pay it my son knows because it isn’t in my sons account. If his dad says something nasty about me my son knows me well enough to know if it is true or not. As a mother it is up to you to build a good relationship with you child. If you are a positive, loving, caring person around that child they will have no reason to think any less of you based on what someone else says.