Since COVID, I’m a SAHM with a 5 yr old and a 3 yr old. Schools are on and off since COVID, so sometimes our 5 yr old is in school, and sometimes it’s remote. My wonderful husband normally works crazy hours and recently decided to go back to school, so I really never see him. I am typically very active and on top of everything. But I am 8 months pregnant, and every day is a struggle. I am fatigued just by washing the dishes. I am so grateful to be able to be with my children and even more appreciative to have a supportive spouse. I want him to want to come home- I want him to look forward to a clean house, folded laundry in organized drawers, empty sink, hot plate of food, etc. How do you mommies find the energy to do things? I feel I start the early mornings so motivated to take it all on, and by 1 PM, I’m so drained physically and emotionally. I want to be a better wife and mom than just a zombie trying to get through the days. I do everything alone and asking family for help is more stressful & drama than it is relieving. Any recommendations are greatly appreciated!!
It’s normal to be tired at eight months pregnant. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Try to take breaks often, stay hydrated and eat well. Get the kids in the habit of picking up toys. You got this.
Do what you can. No one will remember in five years that the laundry wasn’t folded. Or that there were dirty dishes left in the sink. They will remember that you put them first and made time for them.
Find peace in the mess. Just do what you can, and you’ll be back to your normal self in a few months! Ask your kids to help you, and your husband. If he’s a good guy, he will, and he’ll also understand.
I’m only 5 months pregnant and it is exhausting, especially since we have 6 people in the house (Baby makes 7). I try to focus on one room at a time and take breaks after each one. For example, If I’m going to do my daughters room…I start her laundry, clean her room, and then switch over her laundry and relax until it’s done drying. Then I fold and put it away, and take a short break before starting the next room.
I can definitely relate with you. Just know you are not alone there’s days where I wish I can stay in bed all day (I’m almost 7 months) but my daughter is doing her school online as well and I have a 3 year old son who needs me too. Some things I do is just really try and get some rest through out the day once my daughter is out of her kindgarten class and from there have the kiddos help with picking up their toys to get to vaccuming and all. I don’t have any help other than that until my husband gets back from work. Definitely don’t over do it and take care of yourself as well as be there for your kiddos. It’s not easy I know but in the end it’ll be worth it and i think once baby is here you’ll have a better time adjusting. I sure hope so for myself. Another thing I have been doing is having both kiddos on a reward system for all good behavior and for helping when not being asked I recommend this to be able to relax and not feel overwhelmed. At the end of the week they get a coupon of their choice as their reward.
I don’t. preggo with a 4 yr old n a pup with a hubby with crazy hours n I just do NOT have ANY energy for ANYTHING at all!! I git like this (not as bad) with my son but this time around OMG i’m like a zombie n having no whete t I go n nothing to really do is just adding on to me being a beached whale hang on muma the house will be clean n dishes will get done as long as kids n hubs r happy n healthy tht is ALL tht matters n if hubs is as supportive as u say he will 100% get it xo
Do what you can I have a 6 and 10 yr I do what I can I tell him straight i ain’t done the cleaning
Treat yourself well don’t be so pressured . I was exactly there before . I had a 5 and 2.5 year old kids when I was pregnant at my baby#3 . And ended up giving birth 3 weeks earlier than my EDD
Relax nothing is perfect. My husband works I stay home our kids are 11 8 and 2. Two are e learning and school. Very different schedules. I get done what I can but at some point I give. No sooner do I get one room done they all three mess it up. Plus the two cats and a puppy and uncle that had a stroke. I call it a win if laundry gets done. May not be folded but it’s done
Aweeee 5yr old stepson and my baby was just born in December…so I know how it is ! I was like you the whole pregnancy ,postpartum was so much better !! Just keep your head up it won’t always be like this !!
Lower your standards, nap & rest when you can, prevail upon non-family to help.
Friends far away can send you restaurant or grocery coupons for delivery, money to hire a babysitter, or talk to/engage your kids on face time/zoom so you can do something else. Can you connect with the wives of the men hubs works with? Do you have a church home where there are people who could help? Any older neighbors who might love to watch the kids while you nap/get stuff done?
Close by people can do your laundry, lend you a Roomba, bring meals or those you trust can take the kids to the park, help them with schoolwork, or otherwise entertain them while you nap. See if anyone on this forum lives near you and could help. Care.com, neighborhood bulletin boards, college kids studying child development & similar are all great sources to find help.
Use disposable plates & utensils, forget dusting, get the kids to pick up & put away their own stuff, buy healthy frozen dinners & order in so you don’t have to cook, don’t clean everything as often, just stuff that gets touched a lot.
Let the kids watch movies & videos & eat peanut butter sandwiches every other meal. As long as it’s temporary, they’ll be fine.
Your body is working so hard! It’s no wonder you’re exhausted, just like most women in their last trimester. You’re probably doing better than most!
Close by people can offer to do your laundry, lend you a Roomba, bring dinner or those you trust can take your kids to the park while you nap.
Girl relax!! I can’t keep everything organized and cleaned up no matter how many hours I try. It just gets old cleaning and organizing the same things over and over. Rest and enjoy your pregnancy and your kids. Hubby will be just fine and hopefully understanding
At this point, survival mode! As long as you/kids are fed and clean that’s all that is necessary! Don’t sweat the small stuff. You will find that energy after you are done creating another human.
Your husband wants to come home because his family is there, not because you keep a perfect house. Yes in normal circumstances that’s an awesome perk and I’m the same way, but I just had a baby in January and what I learned to do was get what I can done in the morning, throw a meal in the crock pot around noon, and let the rest go. Your husband won’t notice the rest and if he does, he’ll be understanding because you’re having his child (at least I hope!) so give yourself a break, take a breath, get what you can done and let the rest go until the next day.
I agree you don’t have to be perfect
I’ve got 3 boys, 12,8,2yrs cleaning as got less and less over the last few months, don’t know about anyone else but I’m so fed up of cleaning the same mess 100 times a day, i clean once the kids have gone to bed, and sometimes mid-afternoon, if the kids have been full then the cleaning just doesn’t get done, not like anyone comes around to see the house is a state
Well start by learning when to relax. Your not suppose to be perfect . Screw perfect . I have 3 and 2 weeks shy of 8 months I get it. Rest when you need to and clean when there’s energy . If you don’t rest when you can your just going to drag on .
Moat Moms put most of the stress on themselves because they think they have to complete all the care tasks before themselves!!
Its been drilled into our heads since we were kids.
How many times do we tell out kids chores first, responsibilities first. It is for them to learn but Not so much with everything moms gotta do.
Do what you can in the morning and when you give out just relax, if something does not get done that day that’s completely ok.
I take thrive awesome all natural vitamins, it has given me my life back. I wish I had it 25 yrs ago with my first 3 kids. Gives me daily energy, helps me keep up with the 2 younger boys. Helps me get through my days without being tired,beat all day.