How should I handle this situation with my daughter?

So I have an embarrassing question that I can’t seem to find answers too online. My 12-year-old daughter has been wiping her vaginal discharge and period blood on the bathroom wall. The first time it happened a few months ago, I noticed some dark stains on a small part of the bathroom wall. Upon further examination, I realized what it was and my fiance, and I confronted my daughter about it. She admitted it, we had a talk with her asking why she would do something so gross, and she couldn’t give any answers besides, “I don’t know,” and “it’s like I’m bored…” We had her clean it up, and she went on punishment for about a week, taking away tech time, and having her do extra chores. Now yesterday, I find the same thing, except this time it’s clear vaginal discharge, so it went unnoticed for a little bit with us dealing with the pandemic (I’m immunocompromised, so I was in self-isolation for a while, and my fiance had to hold down the fort himself while working overnight shifts). I confronted her last night, and she admitted it again, giving the same answers of “I don’t know,” and “I get bored…” Now my daughter is a good kid. Her teachers love her, and she works hard on school work and hangs out with her nine-year-old sister (most of the time) pleasantly. She does, however, have ADHD and struggles in school grades wise and has moments (like this one) where she does something that completely baffles me and can’t give me an answer as to why. Please no judgment, I would just like some insight as to possible reasons so I can help her and stop this. Thanks!


No experience but you may want to find her a therapist this is very unusual behavior


How can you identify clear vaginal discharge on a wall? And gross. 12 is old enough to know better.


This isn’t normal behavior… I would talk to a therapist


I would make her clean the whole house from top to bottom.


Brink back ass smackings

Is she on social media? Maybe she’s seeing it somewhere? Good luck


What a bizarre behaviour/fascination to have!! I 2nd the making her just clean the entire bathroom… 🤷 Good luck!!


Ask a doctor not Facebook.


I’d definitely talk with her doctor and also a therapist.


Therapy. This is not normal in any shape or form.


Have you spoken to her about this alone? She may open up to you,without your fiance there


It baffles me why your 12 year old would do this, but I can’t think of any reason other, than she wants more attention. She obviously knows the punishment when she does it and she thinks it’s still worth it. The punishment for it should keep getting harsher, but in the meanwhile, you should find her other stuff to do to curb her being bored.


I think first of all try talking to her ok your own. Just one and one. Then I would talk her to doctor and ask them where to go from there. They should be able to recommend a child therapist and other resources but I’ve never heard of this behavior before so I’m assuming it’s very unusual. Good luck mama!


I have 3 girls who have never done this or nor would they. It is not normal behavior .have her clean it and she should see Dr & therapist .


Wow I deff agree with the others about a therapist this is not normal and very disturbing


That is foul behavior. ADHD or not, you don’t do that period and she’s 12 years old there’s no way she doesn’t know better. You need to figure out a punishment that suits her but don’t be easy about it bc she’s being very hoggish. Like ew.


Put her in counseling that shits gross.

1 Like

I wouldn’t punish her, but I would get her in with a good therapist, preferably behavior therapy. This behavior is called smearing, and it’s often associated with a form of self stimulation. I used to work with people with disabilities for many years, and there are many therapist who can address this to prevent it in the future. Good luck!


Your fiancé shouldn’t be part of any discussion about about this issue or even strangers. Talk to her doctor. Possibly take her to an obgyn and have them discuss puberty with her.

On another note, how are you sure clear vaginal fluid is on the wall?