How should I handle this situation with my ex seeing our kids?

Hi everybody. Ok, so where to start. Well, ill start by saying I’m a single mama of 4 boys. Ages 13,11,10 and 6. I got married to my soon to be ex-husband in 2014. He got deported in 2017 for drinking and driving. Well, the moment he got deported, I was a stay at home mom. I started with nothing but was determined to keep my family together. So worked real hard and moved to his home town to be closer to him. Gave up family, friends, and my home “to keep the family together” well moved to this town, don’t know anybody, start working and visit him regularly. Its a 6 hr drive to him so not too bad. Well, Basically, little by little, he started ignoring us and then disrespecting me. Then some lady messaged me saying she was with him, posted all kinds of pictures with him. Let’s say it was the hardest heartbreak of my life. So basically 2019, he disappeared from the boys. Boys felt it hard. Well, he moved to Bermuda and has been wanting to talk to the boys, which is great. I started seeing somebody also, so everything is falling into place. Now he wants to see the boys. Which is fine with if I take them, but he demands it and wants me to take them and drop them off for 15 Days! and take them to the other side of the border. The kids don’t want to go, especially the oldest and the baby. Well, he says the baby has to go whether he likes it or not. I told him hell no, he ain’t taking my kids. But of course, his family thinks I’m a B****; My family thinks I’m right. I just think of the kiddos. I’m their protector, and provider now have been for the past three years and don’t feel like he’s earned the right to make demands.


Nope nope nope. Listen to your instincts and protect your children

I personally wouldn’t and if your oldest child doesn’t want to go he shouldn’t be forced to go. He hasn’t been around, there doesn’t seem to be a court order, it should be up to you and the children. If he wants to see the children maybe you two should start off small

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Nope… unless a court tell you otherwise… nope.


Make sure you have a court order in place stating who has primary custody , I know some states if you don’t then he would be able to keep the children until that was in order

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Once they are out of the US he could legit disappear with them, courts could take months or years to get them back. Ask a lawyer, have him come to them especially uf there are trust issues


Girl don’t because he might not give them back no it’s hard to fight for custody in two different countries


NO!!! He can keep them!!!
They’ll be out of the country and it will be almost impossible to get them back!!!


I would not drop my children off in another country- especially with everything going on right now. They could close the border at any time and you might not get them back for months or years!


Do not let them go he doesnt have a leg to stand on!

No once he leaves over the boarder theres a chance tou will never see them again please don’t a friend of mine did this and she has been looking fornher kids for the last 4 years.


I absolutely would not let him take them. If there is no established custody then he could keep them from you until you fight him in court. Listen to your gut instinct. If custody is not established you should definitely file for full custody before he does.


Hell no my kids wouldn’t be going with him at all protect those babies it doesn’t seem right

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I wouldn’t let my children cross any border to see a man that had no problems walking away. Nope, nope, nope.


Half way and compromise or nothing at all. It’s only fair. Dont succumb to the manipulation. You are stronger and better than that. Fuck his family too… not like a sour ass bitch but compromise is key here. His family should see that

What does your court order say?

The kids don’t wanna go dont send them


I wouldn’t, especially out of the US…


Hell no!!! Sort out custody aswell so if anything ever happened hed legally have to bring your kids back to you.
Even the kids know that it’s messed up and don’t want to go. Steer clear of them and block his family as you do not need guilting


He could keep them. You might not see them again. Trust your gut and your children’s