How should I handle this situation with my husbands family?

Question: I’ve been in a relationship for a couple of years now and i have a son with this man. I have two sons from my previous marriage. As he has four kids with his previous relationship. However what really bothers me is how his family still welcomes her for everything, helps her out, and constantly has her over their house. When I say they help her out, I mean money, babysitting, and giving her an extra job in the family business. However, he generally pays for everything the kids need. I stop talking to his family for that very reason. Holidays come, and they invite her first, and then I can come by afterward, which in my opinion they can go somewhere else with that bull. She has another relationship, but I feel like she’s too needed for everything, and I mean everything. Due to a large number of kids, we have my children and his are mostly separated because his kids have always been disrespectful and clingy with him. I can’t get near him without them trying to climb him or slapping his face for attention when he and I speak, one of his daughters kick my son in his face while in the park, and the oldest whom is 13 is always bothering the baby by removing him fro,m places his playing. I saw her pinch Him once, and I told her father, next time, I will address the issue with her as she’s too old to act like that. Basically, what I’m saying is those kids act just like their mother. The ex won’t leave his family alone, and they get on his case about never helping her out when he has evidence. I told him I wanted to end things. Am I wrong for doing so? He pays for babysitting, buys food and takes it their location, he drops them off at school and takes the kids to their mother’s house every day after school. He never has time for his son or myself.

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You are strong to hold it together. If a 13 year old pinched my baby i would knock them out and catch a charge. Speak to the family about all of this and see if you all could come up with some kind of solution. Your husband should also be your frist advocate. Good luck mama

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Don’t get involved with a man with children if you can’t handle the fact that you’re not going to be top priority :woman_shrugging:

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Holy yikes… I don’t blame you for wanting to end things! That woman is like a human hemroid, I feel bad for you!

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Are you serious?!! :roll_eyes: You sound silly. He was married and had a WHOLE family before he met, married, and procreated with yo!! His family doesn’t have to exclude her…THEY HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER TOO!! Just b/c he remarried doesn’t mean you get to dictate their relationship with her. And STOP projecting your dislike for her onto those kids!! From their perspective your STOLE their dad (not saying that’s true!) but they are kids. Trying being adult and discuss the iss6with your husband about the 13 y/o and learn to coparent better with his ex. Btw, he’s doing what’s he’s supposed to do, you don’t get extra parent points for what your SUPPOSED to do for your children!! Geez!! :roll_eyes::roll_eyes:

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Sounds like he should end it with you…

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So you don’t like his kids and don’t let them come around and then you wonder why his family doesn’t like you? Hahahaha. HE divorced his ex, not his family. They can be friends with whomever they please. And yes, you should leave. It’s very obvious you don’t like his kids.

He needs to leave you yikes

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I think you’re the asshole here 🤷🤷🤷

first off do u know if she has any other support or family have u and tried getting togather just u two with all kids and all have a chat saying were all family lets join us as one

Yeah that’s a hard spot to be in. And they shouldn’t be making you feel less.

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Wow, I don’t really have any good advice, he and his family are heavily involved with the ex. To the point of neglecting you and your child’s feelings. You are his wife, his rib, apart of him…smh. I personally would be done. Like no threats or ultimatums. Just done, maybe then you’d be treated right.

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Other than pinching the baby, everything else sounds like you’re mad at him for being a good dad. You’re upset that he buys them food, takes it to them and drops them off at school?

As for the in laws, I think it’s healthy everyone still has a good retlationship with their mother, you should want to have a good relationship with her too if possible. It’s healthier for the children if everyone gets along.

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I can tell you that this relationship isn’t going to last with you and him lol. You’re bitter. Only major issue I see is the 13 year old pinching the baby which I would actually kick her in the face. :tipping_hand_woman:

Talk to your husband. Yes he has other kids and they are also a priority, but he shouldn’t be putting his ex first! They’re no longer together for a reason and he’s with you now. If he isn’t taking your feelings into consideration and planning a way to work things out where all kids needs are met and yours are too, maybe it is time to walk away…

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Juanito El Osito Lucero :thinking:

Family is family. He sounds like a good man. The only problem I have with this is the pinching the baby, you should have gotten after her right then and there. Sounds like the family knows you have issues so they are trying to keep everything separated and peaceful.

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So his family continue to support their Grandkids and his children are wanting their farther attention and they could be a bit worried about where they fit with a new baby in the mix. Try looking through a different lens. Like it or not the x and her kids are still part of the family

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Omg! A father takes his kids to school and picks them up to drop them off at home?! He also pays for babysitting and food?! The freaking horror. :unamused:

You knew what you were getting into prior to procreating with the man. You are a blended family and like it or not, the mother will always be in the picture. I think it’s nice she still maintains an amicable relationship with her ex-husband family; pretty sure it makes it easier for the kids to see that Grandpa and Grandma are okay with mommy.
Honestly, their relationship and how they choose to treat her really isn’t any of your business; but that sure doesn’t keep you from making it yours.
Why do you even care? Unless, of course, you feel threatened.

Also, the way you talk about your husband kids and mom, I don’t blame them for acting the way they do towards you. I mean you take issue with kids being clingy to their own father?
Who the hell feels that way about a child and their parent(s)?

If I were husband, I’d leave you,.

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It’s called a blended family, either blend or leave. It’s not all about just you.

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