How to start potty training?

Well we started potty training on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and even Monday. I am still at a loss for potty training. I’m just starting to think she isn’t ready. Well we have a Minnie Mouse potty chair in the living room and a a toilet seat on the actual toilet in the bathroom. We let her pick out her own underwear. She obviously choose Minnie Mouse since that is her favorite. We did the toilet seat let her draw on it with dry erase marker. We have a sticker chart. We let her go to the store and pick out her end prize (a baby doll). And her own reward for sitting on the potty, peeing and pooping in the potty. A mini starburst. She sat the first day. Nothing in the potty. She will go in her underwear. She freaked out if she wasn’t wearing anything. Next day she sat on occasion. Sunday and Monday she sat only once both days while screaming bloody murder. We haven’t left the house since Thursday night to go get what we needed. She will just cry and cry when we ask her to sit on the potty. Or she will hold it til she wears her “special night time underwear” just an overnight thing for toddlers that aren’t fully potty trained. And she will hold it in ALL day til she wears that. It can’t be healthy for her to hold it in like that( from 7am when she wakes up to almost 7pm at night) She will hold both her pee and the poop in. She will complain her stomach hurts. So I sit her on the potty. She won’t go. We are one the potty every 20-30 minutes. For like 5/10 minutes each time and she only peed once in the potty. Well my question is I don’t think she’s ready. I think it’s because on Friday morning when her bio mom (I’m just a friend who has stepped up a lot) called. After like 2-3 weeks of no contact. She went back to wanting to be in a diaper or pull up. We even told her we donated her non used pull ups and diapers to kids in need (just in a closet where she can’t see them). I was wondering if since she hardly sees or hears from her bio mom. Could this be the reason she doesn’t wanna get potty trained? I don’t know if today I should have her in underwear or in a pull up. But we have to go to her appointment for me today which is almost a hour away. I’m just at a loss. She show all signs she is ready but I’m not so sure if she actually is.


How old is she? It honestly sounds like she isn’t ready. And until she is ready potty training will be a nightmare and take FOREVER. Pullups can also confuse kids cause they’re basically diapers. If she is holding her pee and poop in she has control of her bladder but this is a battle you won’t win unfortunately. Kids seem to know you can’t physically make them use the toilet. What helped my 3 year old was I got a potty watch off Amazon. It played a song every time she was supposed to go use the potty. Made it more fun. She turns 4 in 2 weeks and just got night trained a few weeks ago.

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Sounds like shes not ready. Does she wake up dry in the am? Does she tell you when she needs to go?

My son (he’s 6 now) took to the whole "leading into potty training, he even was excited about it. Well he takes one good poop in a potty peed twice in the potty in one day like a champ, then absolutely refused to even hear potty, toilet, big boy underwear… it was about 5 weeks of the back and forth wanting to potty to absolutely hating it. Keep consistent

Never put the potty in the living room. We dont pee or poop in the living she shouldnt as well. She needs to train her body to hold it and run to the bathroom. Keep her in underwear that way she can feel it. Be patient. Get ride of all diaper and pull ups. Put puppy pads in car seat and crip that way if she peed its easy to clean. I’ve been look after children for over 20 years and this works. It will take time. Feel free to PM if you like


There is a watch on amazon for potty training that I’ve known people who have used and it worked for them. Instead of trying every 20-30 minutes try it more frequently and try to make it fun. Depends on her age she may not be ready. My recommendation is to try it more frequently and make it fun so she’ll want to go.

Let her have a pull up for the trip then when you get her home put her favorite underwear on and if she pees in them have her sit in it for five minutes than give her a bath. That’s what my doctor said to do with my two when they were being potty trained. And maybe get her a potty chair that claps or plays music after she pees or poop’s that’s truly what helped me with my two.

Put her on the big potty when you know she has to pee …turn on the faucet

She doesn’t sound ready I have 5 kids and 3 of my 5 we’re ready and fully potty trained between 16+18 months I had one I tried for 2 years he did fully potty train until almost 4 and I have a 3 yo that will not potty train now they are all different just give her time she will get it

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If you wait until SHE comes to you fully ready then you will have no problems. Once she is completely ready on her own, it will be easy peasy and she’ll be trained in no time. I waited until my daughter came to me and I had her fully night and day trained in just 3days at 2.

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I don’t think that it’s not that she isn’t ready, it seems like the random and few times her bio mother is contacting might be the problem. It may be an attention thing, due to the little she gets from her mother. I would keep trying. If her mother does contact you, just explain to her that you’re having a hard time potty training her and to give you a few weeks before talking to her so you can see exactly why she’s not catching on

Every child is different - they are ready when they can tell you they went or have to go so start there.
When my daughter was 2 we had a 3 day weekend and that was all it took. She sat on the potty and watched tv, played, and even ate there so every time she had to go she was relaxed. There were a few times she was up without pants or in big girl underwear that she missed the potty but we only talked about the hits. Positive reinforcement. She still needed diapers at night for a year and sometimes pooping in a big toilet was hard because their little legs dangle and they can’t get the right leverage to push so it’s just easier to go in their pants. Everyone talks about how to reward their kid and how to make them want to go but the real trick is making it feel as natural as going in the diaper. Wake them up before they wake up in the morning and put them on the potty before they soil the diaper. Then consistently (set a timer) put them on the potty. Go before naps, wake them up before they get up after naps and do it again. And put the training potty in the bathroom and try to go on the toilet when they are on the trainer. Put books in there too or let them watch something on the phone.

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She doesn’t sound ready to me. We tried 3 times with the oldest and on the 3rd time it stuck.

I went through a similar experience…mine wasn’t ready. We tried right about 2 years old and again at 2.5 and neither time worked because WE forced it…she ended up just starting on her own right before she turned 3. Wished we had saved ourselves the stress!

I had my son potty trained completely by 3 with no nighttime problems. Bio-dad came over for 2 hours and now 7 years later my son still gets the bed. Never underestimate psychological factors with any major change with any child.

I would wait a little longer. Keep out the potty chair and keep trying her on it but I would put her back in pull ups for a bit until she calms down. I had a potty chair around for almost 6 months before my daughter was fully potty trained. If she knows what it is for and that it is always there she will use it when she wants to.

I dont suggest putting a chair in living room, try potty watch have her go.potty with you and I think you have soooo much stuff going on… Reward her with an m&m eachtime she pottys or 2 for pooping. I would take all 5 of my kids every15 minutes so now they have this potty watch. Might be a great investment

Not ready. This shouldn’t be a stressful situation for her and by her reaction it seems like it is.

Keep the pull ups n take her when you go maybe together may help her ? I had to with one of mine go on big one n he sat on his potty - takes patience but it will happen ;”)

The main problem people have today with potty training is they wait too long to do it. In my kids’ day, you started no later than the age of two. Both kids were trained in one weekend (except of course night time); and it was a weekend devoted to it. I started out setting up the potty chair in the bathroom with a little box of new books next to it. I told them it was their new potty and special books that they would get to use soon. I explained that it was for going potty like mommy and daddy did and they would get to try it in a few days. On the weekend, we started it, and it was pretty much an all day/two day event. Once they get the general idea, it gets easier. Don’t make a big deal if they don’t want to do it, but be very matter of fact and let them know that it will be that way from now on. As far as treats after, I was not a big candy giver with toddlers, so the treats were more of a “let’s read a book” or we played a game. Yes, it’s time consuming, but worth every second.

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