How would you respond to your SO if you were venting to him and he told you it's "not that hard"?

When a man (your SO) says to you “it’s not that hard” as you’re venting to him, what’s your response? Regardless of the situation or circumstances, if you’re confiding in him that you’re having a difficult time, do you find that to be an appropriate response? Or would you lose it (as I did)?

3 Likes

I’d go mad, it doesn’t matter if its not that hard to him its valid to you and he should respect that as your partner

5 Likes

Depends on what it was about. Sometimes we can all be a little dramatic when we are upset or frustrated. Even my SO gets that way over something small and im like ok its not that bad. I do the same things sometimes when im cooped up too long with the kids im like omg im dying! But if it was something serious or a reoccurring issue that frustrates me or is difficult and he said that I’d be pissed too. My husband is usually very supportive and understanding and I try to be as well. If its something you can swap roles have him do it for a while and see if its as easy as he seems to think

I would lose it, not the right answer but I definitely would lose it

Mine says . " its just not that serious " ugh pisses me off. And then I think about it . And really it wasn’t that serious. Which pisses me off even more lol

2 Likes

Did he maybe possibly in man brain speaking mean that your overthinking things and it’s time to slow down but keep doing your best … that’s the only positive spin I can put on that lol

My husband does this!!! It’s never that hard or that bad unless its his problems. SMFH

3 Likes

Mine knows better than to say that to me because it would get hard for him quick

1 Like

Maybe things aren’t that hard. And maybe this situation wasn’t that hard… lol

2 Likes

Hide something of his and when he asks you to help him look tell him it’s not that hard :sweat_smile: I would tell him that you are being serious and to answer honestly and not with sarcasm.

6 Likes

Context does matter. Tone of voice also matters.

2 Likes

He’s right sometimes things aren’t that hard… but when you add other things on top of it that one thing could just be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
So alone yes certain situations aren’t that hard but when you have 10 other situations also shit becomes very difficult

really depends… there’s a lot of things I don’t think should be hard and my spouse doesn’t do it… like give our kid meds on time or make sure their hair is brushed before school…

3 Likes

It depends on nothing! Your feelings are valid no matter what they are. Tell him how dismissal of your concerns hurts you or makes you feel. It’s not okay at all

2 Likes

I just tell him it may not be hard, but I am having a hard time with it. I just need you to be there for me and support me, I dont need your opinion.

1 Like

Tell him “it may not seem hard to you but it is for me and I need you to accept and understand that”.

1 Like

Most guys are not that good at solving emotional problems, he probably did not really know what to say. His intention was possibly more like things seem hard but you will get through it, things could be worse. Without having a clue on what the problem you were venting about is it is hard to give more than a vague answer. The best thing to do is talk to him ask him what he meant by his answer, ask him what he would do if he was feeling as you are feeling and what he would do in your situation whatever it is that you were venting about.

1 Like

“regardless of the situation” no booboo, the situation DOES matter. :woman_facepalming:t2:

1 Like

Next time he vents say the same thing

1 Like

Men say they are stronger then women, my ass!