Hi, I’m almost three months postpartum, and I don’t feel like my husband is attracted to me anymore. We’ve had problems in the past with him watching porn and things, and I feel like he’s started it up again, and now I don’t really think he finds my new mom bod attractive because of it. I’ve explained my feelings, and I told him that I felt insecure and that I don’t really like him watching porn. He tells me that he doesn’t anymore, but he freaks out anytime I get near his phone or anything. The other day I walked in front of him without any clothes on, and he didn’t even pay any attention when before he’d be all over me, and he doesn’t seem interested in taking showers with me anymore. We are still pretty sexually active, but I don’t think he actually is attracted to me anymore. I need advice, am I just overthinking, is it really a big deal even if he is watching porn, how can I seem more attractive? P.s he is a great father; it’s just I don’t feel that he really finds me attractive, and I feel he would rather look at other girls.
Porn is such a problem in so many relationships. A weak, selfish man will watch porn even after his woman exspressed that it’s hurtful. We can’t tell you how to deal with this. You have to communicate with him, and if you try and get nowhere it’s up to you to decide what to do about it.
He’s probably on daring sitrs as well to get attention. Trust your gut. Porn is a big deal especially if you told him so. And if he’s on sites tslking to girls it is cheating.
If he was still giving you attention I’d say porn is no big deal. But the fact that he won’t even acknowledge you?? Yes. I’d be mad. You need to have a real heart to heart with him. And he needs to be honest.
Offer to watch the porn with him, might spice it up.
Same boat but no sex. 5 months pp. I wish I knew what to say to help. If you’re still having sex then porn probably isn’t an issue.
Not to be negative Nancy but if he is secretive with his phone, porn could be the least of your worries. I hope that is not the case. Communication has to happen, not just from you. He has to open up to you. Trust me I just went through a big mess in my marriage because he wouldn’t open up in fear of hurting my feelings. I hope things work out and get better for you
I think you’re overreacting about the porn. It’s completely normal for a man to masturbate, it doesn’t mean he isn’t attracted to you. I sometimes think my husband isn’t attracted to me because of my mom bod but he reassures me I’m still beautiful/sexy, he isn’t all over me anymore because he works 10-12 hour days and we have two kids that don’t let us get much sleep but we are still sexually active and it’s still just as good we’re just tired as hell lol I think you may be overthinking it. If he wasn’t touching you at all and sneaking around watching porn and masturbating then you should worry. Just tell him how you’re feeling.
watch the porn with him and share with eachother what you both like and want, start communicating with him and surprising him instead of waiting for him to ask you to pleasure him. Do whatever he doesnt expect. Become another person for him in the bedroom in a way that makes him desire you and love you more.
me m my girl watch porn together and masturbated together and on eachother, theres no pressure and we always are open to new ideas or experiences with eachother to spice things up
My thoughts would be he’s, cheating an porn are the least of ya worries hun sorry to say just coz he’s, sleeping with u doesn’t mean, he isn’t cheating some men still cheat an remain a sexual relationship with their long term partners it’s harder to catch them out then the rats!
I’m in the same boat I have delt with the cheating and porn issues I’m 8 months pregnant and just feel unattractive. I’m bigger then what I was when I had my daughter, I’m not working right now and i just feel like crap. He works 3rd shift right now so that makes things a little more difficult. So I know what ur going through mama.
Him watching porn isn’t a big deal. However, the fact that he freaks out when you get near his phone, may indicate there are bigger problems to worry about; like him cheating. As far as feeling more attractive…there a little things that will help. 1. Get out of pajamas, you will be amazed how much better you will feel if you just get dressed. You don’t have to be all crazy dressed, but out of pajamas. Treat yourself to get your hair and/or nails done. Pampering makes anyone feel better. Also, if you wear makeup, dedicate least 10 minutes to put least mascara and lipstick on ( neutral of course ) or make sure your hair is done for the day. And all of this, do it FOR YOU, not for anyone else. When you feel good, the energy around you changes.
Ugh this makes me so sad ): my bf treated me so well during and after my pregnancy and he still tells me how beautiful I am and etc . My heart hurts for you but I bet you’re beautiful. Talk to him about it, the freaking out ab every time you go near his phone is concerning… my ex used to do this to me all the time and he was cheating on me I’m not trying to worry you but I would def talk to him ab it
Get some porn of your own…if he thinks he isn’t attractive…he may get jealous. Sometimes they have no clue what a mom g ok as through to have their child…what if the roles were reversed…would he not be concerned? It only goes downhill if you let it…his secrets on his phone is the issue.
Those are big red flags…
People that suggest to watch porn together really piss me off… She stated she does NOT like it. She is completely entitled to not like something. Men are NOT primal animals they can control their dicks just as much as we can control our urges. They dont NEED to watch porn. Some people are ok with it. Some arnt. But If its been expressed that it is an issue and he does it anyway that is complete disrespect.
If you’re badgering about porn? He’s probably a little peeved.
You gotta let go of the porn issue. Watch with him. Find out what he’s into and see if you can incorporate it into your sex life, but you can’t judge him or he will resent you and hide things from you. Your bodily insecurities are yours, don’t visit them on him. If he wasn’t attracted to you, he wouldn’t he having sex with you regularly. If you don’t like yourself, start working out. Idk what to say about his phone. Trying to control him isn’t going to convince him that he can be honest with you.
Sounds more like cheating