I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant with my second baby. My son is 11 months, and we have never had a night apart. I am scheduled for a c section and know I must stay a minimum of 3 days in the hospital, and I’m aware he cannot visit due to covid. It will be my first few nights without seeing my son, and honestly, I feel a strong sense of anxiety and helplessness, knowing this is coming up in three short weeks. My question is, how did everyone else feel? How did you get over that anxiety? It’s my biggest worry, ATM. I don’t want to feel this anxiety over my son I know he is in good hands, I just can’t get over this overwhelming feeling of not being ready to let him go a few nights.
My daughter is almost 4 and I’m being induced next Wednesday. We’ve never been apart more than one night. So I’m definitely struggling with this as well. Following and good luck!
Could you FaceTime with him so you can see him and he can see you.
You dont get over it. Facetime. Leave him with someone you trust and have them follow your routine. As they say, he will be better than you, and thats true.
My son is on the spectrum and he is 5 so leaving him in general is very stressful for me unless everything is planned precisely. When I was pregnant with my daughter, my parents were able to take my son, and keep him on our regular routine schedule and normally my anxiety was Sky high but I had to remember that I’m bringing another one of my babies into this world and I need to focus and keep myself and her safe and take advantage of the few days alone and nap when I can and get better so that I can eventually be there for both of my babies.
Learn Tapping solutions from the app nick and Jessica Ortner… look it up does wonders
I have no idea! I have the same feelings, so i haven’t left him overnight yet lol. Ummmmm he just turned 1 and I’ve only ever gone to the store once without him. Besides working pt. Have been with him every second.
Its natural to feel anxious about leaving your children for the first time, but, while you don’t actually get over it (natural to feel slight anxiety each time), it get a little easier each time. Also, and this is just my opinion, it is good for your child to be away from you for short periods of time. It’s the first step in them becoming independent adults.
I think it would ease some anxiety to make sure he’s left with sweet reminders/comforts from you- so he can cuddle with your t-shirt, see a picture of you, etc to keep that connection. Facetiming would help, and maybe reading a book about moms bringing home siblings. For you mama, finding a mantra or loving saying to repeat to yourself will help ease your anxiety- like “I am taking care of both my babies like a rockstar and my son is a resilient, amazing human”. Mama you got this!
When I had my 5th my 2nd watched my 4th. She was 14 at the time and my mother was with her most of the time to be the adult in the house with her. That baby was 16 months old at the time. When I had my 6th she was 17¾. So my mom was a phone call away if needed and she watched the other two. Also, my ex husband lives 5 mins away.
Whoever he’ll be staying with should come spend a night or two with both of you between now & then. Watch how they interact to calm your nerves & allow them to help do bedtime so it’s not someone BRAND NEW doing what Mommy does nightly. Do FaceTime as much as y’all can allow while apart, it’ll help your nerves & result in a better delivery setting for new baby.
FaceTime as often as you/he needs to for reassurance
I had my son via c section and I asked to be discharge after 24 hours doctor said if that is what I want there is no reason why not. So that’s what I wanted and that’s what happened. It was my third choice section.
Try a trial night away, before the stress of the birth comes.
I had the worst guilt. My daughter was born with unexpected medical issues that resulted in a 2 week nicu stay an hour away. My husband was fortunate enough that he was able to take some paid time off. So they facetimed me and had daddy son time which helped out a lot bc it kept his mind off things. I would drive back home at night to spend time with them and leave in the morning to get back to the nicu
I’m on the same boat girl. I’ve never been away from my girl she’s always with us day in and day out. I’m due anytime. But I’ll be leaving my baby with my mother when the time comes. It makes me feel a whole lot better because I know that she’ll be in good hands.
May I suggest you do a trial run before hand? For you him and his caregiver. Then he will know it is ok Mommy will be back. Face time him that night so you can do that in the hospital too. Just a couple of suggestions.
It’s hard. I had an induction that took 2 days followed by a 2 day stay. So 4 days. I was anxious to get back to my husband and my 6 year old son. I had my mom at the hospital with me, and my husband and son face timed and were able to watch the birth (from my head, PG lol) they called me often/face time. We talked to each other before we went to bed. It was a long time but you will get through this and you won’t look back
Best advice: don’t stress mama and don’t overthink it. Accept that you feel the way you feel. My mother in law brought our son to the hospital multiple times before we gave birth to our second boy. It was getting late at night and he came for the last time that night and I cried hugging him goodbye. I walked with him holding his hand all the way down the hall and to the doors. I continued crying and reminded myself that he would be there right away in the morning. The doors shut and I walked back down the hall to my room. All of the nurses saw me and understood what I was going through. My nurse walked in the room and told me she was going to give me a moment with just my husband. Hours later we gave birth to our second baby and we didn’t allow anyone to come. My mother in law was the first one we let come visit in the morning and my husband greeted her outside of the door and brought only our son back in to meet his new brother. Covid is a whole different story, but I’m going to try and do the same thing on our 3rd baby!