I am struggling with housework and being a mom: Advice?

I have three children, one of whom is an eight-month-old. I am struggling with balancing housework and meals mainly because my baby cries the entire time I’m doing something that requires me to be in a different room. If I bring her, she often will end up getting into something or wanting me to pick her up, and I end up unable to finish what I am doing because she will then want to nurse or play or cuddle-you name it. How do everyone balance cleaning and meal planning while giving each of their children the time and attention they need? I feel once she gets a bit older and doesn’t require as much attention, it won’t be an issue. I just feel crappy folding towels while she cries when I could instead be doing something like reading a book to her or playing peekaboo. I am sensing my husband is getting fed up with the mess, though. Any suggestions would be great.

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I have no easy solution for you. Without knowing the ages of your other children and whether they are in school or day or home with you as well. But, nap time is a good time for chores and after they go to bed in the evening and I realize you are a stay at home mom but, it doesn’t mean that dad can’t chip in and wash dishes while kids are getting a bath or folding a load of towels won’t kill him. Team work makes a better marriage. Good luck.

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I used to keep my little one
In a baby front pack and do all the house work that way. She was colicky and had to be kept upright, she cried all the time she was left lying down so this was the best solution for me and she was warm comfortable and happy

Put child in a play pen in a room closeby with safe toys. Otherwise this child learns that by crying he/she will get their way which is you picking them up. They need to learn “alone time” and to be able to entertain themselves. It may take days or maybe a week or more but it’s not going to harm them. Maybe some soothing background music in that room and possibly a child cam so that you can see that the child is perfectly ok. Babysitting these types is not easy if not taught “alone time.”

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Get a playpen you can move around from room to room for baby. incorporate help from your older children… Make a chore chart to earn stars for Santa :wink: Meal times you just have to plan ahead. you can even make meals ahead of time for freezer and pop in oven. House cleaning… you’ll never be caught up until the leave the nest. Dont get overwhelmed. You will manage just fine :slight_smile: P.S. Hubby CAN lend a hand to help out with house cleaning!

Honestly when my babies were sick or just extra clingy I put them in one of those front carrier things. You know the ones that strap around your body and the baby sit in the front. That thing was a life saver some days. My 2nd one was the most needy and whiney so there was many days I used that thing and was able to finish my chores. I also found that those vibrating seats are also nice for clingy babies!!! Dont be too hard on yourself being a mom is hard. Just pick a chore or 2 a day and try to accomplish those ones. I did my best to get something done each day and if I didnt it was okay because there is always tomorrow!!!

It comes with the territory.give up & leave it all or pull up ur big girl panties & take deep breath’s.i also worked 2 jobs as a nurse ,single,3 little kids & my home to clean

Let her cry and switch to bottle feeding. Mommy guilt is a bitch, but spoiling a baby makes life harder on the kid as they get older. I’m not cold hearted, I WAS the spoiled baby. Not understanding why adults treated me like a normal kid instead of like the sun shined out my bottom was confusing, hurtful, and traumatic.

Play peek a boo while you fold clothes. Hold the towel over your face, do peek a boo a couple of times, then fold the towel quickly. It will take a while but the laundry will get done. Have an older child read a book to her. If the child can’t read just have them make up a story that goes with the picture. It’s good for both kids. They can sit next to you and you can add to the story too. And yes, dad can help with housework too. Your job is Mom not Maid.

If he’s getting fed up with the mess HE CAN CLEAN IT!!! What kind of cave man stuff is that. Strap that baby to your back and get your work done. It’s not that hard.

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Use a back pack carrier for kids can be used in front or back, my aunt used one.

Find a routine that will work for you and your children. Don’t worry about what Dad thinks. Everyone has different ways on raising their children. Don’t worry too much about house chores. There is no such thing of being like Mary Poppins. You can put Baby in a Back pack to do house chores. You can put her in a stroller/pram to allow her to see and watch you. You can spend 10-30minutes to push her around till she falls asleep. Tummy time with a mirror to allow Babyto see themself wears them out. You also must find time in this routine to rest your feet up or have a snooze. Yes please don’t you dare blow yourself. A bubble bath. Sitting outside. Please do self care :heart::heart::heart::heart:

I have 3 children. 8 month old, 3 yr old and 5 yr old. My house is always a mess and when i start cleaning my 8 month old cries for attention. I ignore her until i finish what im doing or sometimes I stop doing what im doing. Its difficult but my husband helps out a lot. I sometimes feel guilty that he helps bc he’s the only one that works. But i see it that i work too here at home. And its a never ending job. Maybe your husband should help instead of getting frustrated or something. Give your 8 month old something that will keep her/him entertained.

This is difficult for most moms. Try to find a way she can stay occupied yet close enough that will afford u a little time to get a few things done. I’m sure she’ll b ok in no time & u will feel better. Possibly ur husband or a family member/friend can spend alil time with her and u can get a head start with meal prep, vacuuming, dishes, etc. These things u need to do and aren’t able to care for baby at the same time while others u can do with her. Ex: folding laundry while she plays with it, dusting while playing peekaboo, etc. Same can work when having to spend time with ur other children. Not sure of their age but maybe reading a book together, board game, a movie night, etc. it’s not ALWAYS going to work but a schedule to balance things is very helpful. Communicate with ur husband about how hard this really is. Some days he can also either clean or keep the children occupied to alleviate the stress. Remind urself this is temporary. Clearly u want to do it all. Great mom! Just keep doing ur best. It’ll all work out & ur children know they r loved.

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To hell with the housecrap, enjoy your baby

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I’m waiting for the unhelpful… Oh I had ten kids and did it crap… Does your baby have a nap… I find doing it even if its just a ten min nap to race around and do the main things. And with meals may e make a batch of food when baby is happy and put in freezer then it’s just heating it up rather than just from scratch

Step 1,
If your husband is getting fed up then explain to him exactly what your facing every day (and explain how hard it is…) This wont work of course, so this is what you do :- tell him you have an appointment (take your pick of days, reasons etc), but something that will take “all day” to complete. Leave him with the children and a list of the things that need to be done that day…
When you come back he will be foaming at the mouth, but give him a day or two to calm down and he will realise how difficult it is, and develop a whole new appreciation for you :blush:
Step 2,
Buy a playpen :wink:
Good luck!

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Easy solution. Let. Her. Cry. She needs to be taught discipline from the get go and know what is expected. This is being said as gently as possible by the way. She’s manipulating you already and knows it. Not in the sense an adult would and knows but she knows if she starts crying you’re eventually going to cave and just cater to her instead. The older she gets the more serious its going to become. Early boundary setting is healthy. Teach her she isn’t going to get her way all the time and there are times you need to get things done. Model that for her. Mine used to the same thing. I had her tied in a wrap to me for the first year. After that she went into a playpen and whether she cried or not I got what I needed to done. Naps are great times to do heavier/time consuming stuff like cleaning, meal prep, and dishes. Play pen is better for light things like putting in or folding laundry, sweeping, etc. that way she can see you and you know she’s safe. Crying doesn’t always mean she’s actually upset or in need.

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Can you baby wear while you cook and clean?

Tell your husband to jump in and help

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