I am struggling with my mental health due to my boyfriend leaving me while pregnant: Advice?

I’m really struggling with my mental health due to being left and disrespected while pregnant. I’m currently 25 weeks pregnant with my first child, and the Father is absolutely horrible. We were dating for a few months, and I unexpectedly fell pregnant. He wanted me to get an abortion, but I just couldn’t do it. I’ve tried to be civil and involve him, but he has zero respect for me and appears to have a lot of hatred. He told me that he has a new GF now and she doesn’t want him to have anything to do with my son or me. He also said that he wouldn’t see me because he doesn’t want to be tempted to sleep with me. I don’t want a romantic relationship with him; I only wanted him to be part of my son’s life. It’s very hurtful, and I’m feeling incredibly lost. Know other women have been through similar situations. I could really use some advice, guidance, and positive vibes atm. How do I handle this? Please send positive vibes my way. I need it right now.

23 Likes

Don’t put him on the birth certificate.
Speak with a therapist.
Fix your crown queen and move on. You and the baby are better off without him.

17 Likes

Well my sons dad and I split up after my son was 6 months old. His involvement is very minimal I don’t get child support but I’m in the process of filing. I don’t force him to be involved aside from that if he doesn’t want to our son or send him gifts for holidays or his birthday then that’s fine. It took me a year and a half after our separation for me to accept it all and now that I’ve accepted it it’s made my life so much easier. It’s all a process of going through the emotions esp when your pregnant it’s very disheartening. But you need to be strong for your baby and I told myself multiple times God gave me my son for a reason❤️

He has made his stance VERY clear. Dont give the baby the jerks name. Accept the choice you made and move on and be the best you can be for your kid. Not saying it’s easy but forget him.

6 Likes

Go to legal aid and get some advice on parental rights and serve him with child support papers for him to start supporting your son, and to do a custody arrangement! Get counseling for yourself to deal with all the changes that it will bring being a single mom

2 Likes

Get the legal DNA test, obtain a court ordered child support decree with visitation privileges. If he chooses to exercise the opportunity to participate in your sons life, that’s great. If he doesn’t , your son is better off.

1 Like

I’d honestly let him go. If he’s letting you down, he will let that baby down.
I’d be happy live happy and kick some single mama warrior ass and make a great life for you and that baby. Congrats too.

3 Likes

Honey, you’re expecting a different situation for your child, maybe bc that’s what you had growing up… but your situation does not have any rule book to follow. You see this as a bad thing. DON’T!! This is a blessing! Do not involve him, do not put his name on the birth certificate, don’t tell him your child’s name or possible name. Just block him and forget he exists. This is your child.

11 Likes

Let him go you and the baby are better off. Dont give him his last name, dont put him on the birth certificate! Move on with your life you deserve better and so does that baby. If he does not want to be involved that is his choice and his loss.

4 Likes

Your baby may be better off without him! You got this mama. You don’t need a person like that in your life especially around your kids.

3 Likes

If he is being angry and resentful because you continued the pregnancy, it would be a mistake to push him to be in this child’s life. I’m speaking from experience. I moved out the day I found out I was pregnant because he did not want a baby. My daughter will be 4 yrs old next week and he is still bitter. Get some counseling. Let your friends and family be your support system. I have a wonderful man now and he loves my child as his own. You will be ok.

He told you he didn’t want a child. You should respect that as well. Walk away. Sounds like yall are better off without him.

2 Likes

You don’t have to put him on the birth cert and you don’t need to involve him in your sons life and since he doesn’t want anything to do with either of you I’d abide by his wishes but I’d also make sure he pays child support.

5 Likes

Make sure his name is on birth certificate. U cant make someone care even tho he should. Count your blessings and plan a life for you and your child without him. You will be better off without the heartache. Turn to family, friends and God.

1 Like

Put father unknown. Don’t let him back in your life. He’s never going to be a father. I know this. Same happened to me 29 years ago. I have a great woman with a PhD and in her own home. You can do this.

4 Likes

God provides for the birds and the bees he will provide for your child.The GF day is coming. Same knife sticks goat stick sheep

2 Likes

Get your prenatal visits and talk with a therapist to help with your emotions. There is no need to be stressed during your pregnancy so do what is best for you and baby. Your precious baby will change your life and show you just how strong you are. Keep moving forward and hold your head up high. Sending you prayers :heart::pray:

2 Likes

Im a single mom and completely understand. Right now leave it alone. Some space will do you both good. The last thing you need to do is stress and worry over a man who is clearly giving you grief. Everything you feel the baby feels. And can cause the baby to become high strung. Step back, take a breath and focus on you and the baby right now. When you’ve both had some time to yourself try to have an adult conversation, if it’s still toxic leave him alone and take it to court.

3 Likes

He isn’t worth the salt in your tears!!!
You got the best part of him when you got pregnant. I would talk to your doctor, you stress… The baby will stress. Being pregnant puts your emotions all over the place.
Better things are waiting for you…
I know its hurtful, and you feel alone… Join a support group. Keep your head up. I wish you the best

4 Likes

Girrrll my baby daddy left me when I was two months pregnant and had a gf when I was five so yeah looks like you’re gonna be doing this shit by yourself. Do not put his name on the birth certificate or give him the dads last name… Therapy isn’t a bad idea either.