I am struggling with the thought of letting my mom and sister in my childs life: Advice?

I really need some advice. I am 26 weeks pregnant living on my own with my boyfriend supporting ourselves, and I don’t know if I should let my mother and sister in my baby’s life. My mother and sister are both drug addicts they have been for YEARS my mother has been one most of my life and my sister followed right in her footsteps. I know she doesn’t have much time left living the way she is she’s 51 and still lives with my grandma she wants more than anything to be apart of my life and pregnancy but I’ve almost completely shut her out of my life. I’m scared to let them in his life because I know the hurt I’ve been through with them. I can’t let it happen to him. My boyfriend’s mom is ready to be a good grandma, and my grandma is ready to be a good great-grandma. I don’t know what to do i feel lost.

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Just flat out no you will lose you child

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let me clarify some some people are going to nitpick if something happens you could lose your child with them being in the picture

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Pretty sure you know what to do, you just feel guilty keeping your baby away from people who have a foothold in your life :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Your child’s safety must come first

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Coming from an ex addict. My step daughter basically pulled my head out of my ass. Im also a forgiving person. My thought would be maybe you let them both come around ONCE to meet the baby. After that they have to be clean in order to see it. It could be nothing changes OR it could help maybe get ur moms head out her ass and ur sister follow suit.

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Tell them they have to get clean and stay clean with drug test if they want to be around him maybe it will help them to get off drugs and if they don’t do it then it’s on them and you have nothing to feel guilty about you have to do what’s best for your baby

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I’ve been in the same situation for about 11 years now. My mom has been a addict my whole life. I have 3 children and 1 otw and she isn’t in any of their lives! She doesn’t even remember my one year olds name… I don’t let her in my kids lives and she doesn’t try to be. It has worked out for the best bc I don’t want my kids feeling the hurt and disappointment I felt as a child.

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My parents do drugs so I cut them out Completely of my and my sons lives. Told them that until they are clean we will not speak.

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It’s shit but would you walk into a park, see a drug addict put the drugs and needles etc in their bag and then let them communicate and interact with your kid?

I would suggest you offer her this…if she wants to be a part of your life or ur baby’s life she needs to get sober. Maybe let her have one short visit after he is born and tell her if she wants more she needs to get sober. That may be the kick she needs. If she chooses to not get sober don’t let her visit again

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Addiction should never come before family, Hell to the No! They are obligated to make a change in life choices

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That is a hard NO. You only owe your child the best life. Introducing him to drug addicts is far from good on any level. Tell her in no uncertain terms what it will take to be a part of her grandchilds and your life without any regrets!

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I always say if they are toxic to YOU they are toxic for your baby.

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If you don’t allow them into YOUR life, you don’t change that when a baby comes into the world!

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Don’t feel guilty for keeping your child safe. It’s perfectly acceptible to keep toxic(and yes, drug addicts are VERY toxic, no matter what your relation is to them) people out of your lives. It would be a hard no from me.

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Don’t do it girl. It’ll cause both you and your baby more heart ache than it’s worth especially when your child grows up and gets attached to them!

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No you could lose your child and they might even harm him

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If she wants to be tell her to be clean for a year . But no under drugs !

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If she isnt willing to get clean she does not want it more than anything

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As a mother your number one job is to protect your child. If they get treatment and can stay clean maybe you could revisit the issue, but if not it is not healthy for you or your child.

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