I am thinking about calling of my wedding due to my fiances drinking problem: Advice?

I agree with others… take yourself and your child away from that. Build a safe environment for you and your daughter. If he wants a relationship with you and his daughter he will seek help and get sober… but don’t marry him before that.

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My best friend is going thru the same thing. He “quit” drinking (she found empty bottles hidden on top on her kitchen cabinets)now he drinks on his way home daily. And lies about it. She followed him and saw him leaving liquor store. Girl its lie after lie. She has to be home early enough every day so he can drink 2 6pks so he can sleep. Her life is hell. She hates it and resents the hell out of him. He drinks falls asleep on the couch daily. Oh and can barely have sex anymore, its not working must be drunk to. Call it off, he needs to be sober at the very least a year!!! Thats 365 days no booze at all. Is he worth waiting for?? Think of your child watching this. Kids know and it ruins their lives to.

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Not worth the rest of your life with someone is like that go with your gut

Leave and don’t look back unless it pertains to your child. I’ve been there. I’m now married to someone who loves me unconditionally and shows it and… he doesn’t have a drinking problem.

If you’re thinking. You might as well do.

I know you only want what’s best for your daughter, and that you’ve stayed with him for your daughter. However, as the daughter of an alcoholic dad and a codependant mom, all I can say is I wish she’d left him. Growing up with split parents can be better than growing up watching the tension and the anger and the sadness, and building a strange idea of what love looks like. I’ve got PTSD (diagnosed) from living in the same environment as them, and I’m constantly fighting my own brain. Please consider how things may get worse and how your daughter’s growing mind will be affected by living in chaos. I say this with all the love, no judgement at all, I know it’s not so simple or easy to leave.

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Tell him its you or the booze. That’s it. End of story.

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I would postpone until he can complete rehab and remain sober for an extended period of time…I was once an alcoholic & said very mean things to my husband…drunk words are not sober thoughts…some of the things I was recorded saying was things I NEVER thought to ever say & was not things I meant, ever. But that did not excuse my actions to him, doesn’t excuse how much I hurt his feelings, it’s still words said in any situation which can cut deep. Maybe record him when he’s drunk, especially if he blacks out. Until alcohol is kicked, things could get worse.

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Why would he mean it this time? He needs help to stop and it’s not you… sorry but your child shouldn’t live like this .

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You don’t want to raise your daughter in that environment, you give her the wrong message!

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leave, he will never stop. Live for you and your daughter. it wont cost you now to leave, but once you marry you will pay to have to leave…LEAVE

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Chic you need to get out why you can never stay for a kid wrong reason . If he has done this to you for 5 years and continues to tell you the same thing but never does what he says as bad as it might hurt you may be better off leaving him you and your daughter to find a better place you will find someone to treat you and your daughter so much ch better …

Please get away so u can save u and your daughters life

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Call off the wedding. You have stuck with him, he has no reason to change. It will get far worse, if you marry him; and, you will really be “stuck” with a drunk, who will eventually abuse your daughter too. Stop the insanity now.

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He will never change - don’t do it
I was in a similar situation but got married - 7 years later we divorced because I didn’t want my daughter thinking that that was normal or acceptable behavior

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Never love a man so much that you forget the truth about him. Staying with this man is a guarantee of a lifetime of unhappiness and abuse. Don’t be stupid

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Not guna happen hun! Walk away scott free dont do this to urself and ur daughter!!!

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I married mine despite his drinking problem.huge mistake!it got worse. He got mean and abusive.hit me with a vehicle in a drunken rage amongst many other instances of abuse
Claiming that he now owned me and that he can do whatever he wanted because I was stuck with him now. Needless to say we are divorced now.girl run and dnt look back.

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Actions Speak Louder Than Words.
He Still Drinks, And You Are Still There. Question Your Own Actions As Too Why You Continue Too Put Up With It. Your An ENABLER, ACTIONS,
LET GO GIRL

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Leave now divorce can be very difficult and expensive. Until he loves himself and you more than the booze, you and your daughter will lose. He has shown you who he is for 5 years, believe him. What if he drives drunk with your daughter and kills her?

Supervised visits only between your daughter and him, get sole custody. Don’t badmouth him, but tell your daughter he is sick and has to choose to get better before you can spend much time together. You can revisit seeing him after he has joined AA, gotten counseling, and stayed sober a minimum of two years with no relapses.

I’m so sorry. You’ll likely meet someone better and not only have the wedding you dreamed of but the marriage of your dreams, not abuse from a drunk. Life will get better and your daughter will be proud of you for leaving him.

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