I’m 22 years old and seeking advice for myself regarding marriage/relationship. I’m about to finish college in May, I’ll be getting my bachelors degree, and super excited. My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now and will be eight years in December of this year. We’ve lived together for a year now (moved because it was closer to school and both never wanted to move into each other’s parents’ house, so we waited until we got our own place together). Everything has been great! We both work, and I definitely feel we are a team at home and love to be together. I’ve been thinking about marriage recently because I know that I want to spend forever with him, and a part of me somewhat wants to start a family soon too, but I know we always talked about being married before doing so. We talk about marriage, future plans, and having a baby openly. We’ve always been firm on buying a house, being married before starting a family. I feel buying a house is somewhat far away, maybe something in two years, because I know we could still save and should so I feel having a baby is in the same boat because I know We would prefer to start our family in a home we love rather than our apartment that isn’t baby-friendly. But honestly, apart from me just keeps thinking of how our eight years will be in December and we should elope and get married. We’ve talked about eloping because his parents can’t stand to be around each other, and it’s really hard for me to share intimate moments with my family as I feel we don’t have that type of connection, so sometimes we think that would just be a better choice for us and more intimate. I’m writing this post because I honestly don’t know when you’re ready to get married. I love my boyfriend; I see us together forever; I would love to have children with him. I’m not scared to marry him, to be his wife, or to take his last name. I honestly would feel so happy. I’m just scared of what people will think or say because I’m 22 and he’s 24, and we’re young. Everyone, including both our families, ask when we’re having babies and how they can’t wait, but marriage is never something brought up, and I think it’s because many people in our families aren’t married but have been together 25 years and have 3+ kids. I know they’d be happy if we had a baby because having babies young in our families is normal, but I feel with marriage, we will get comments of “you’re both so young” or either “wow. We’s so happy for you, it’s about time!” which would be nice. So when I think about eloping, I think of announcing it to our families and my sisters, questioning why we got married, for what, etc. especially because one of them has been with her boyfriend for 12 years and don’t live together, aren’t married so I can see her coming off envious with me in a way and because she’s 27 and since I’m younger it would be a shocker for me to be married I would assume. I think my parents would be happy for me but really shocked as they both were together for 25 years before separating and never married either. Idk how to feel about it but when I think of December and our eight years, I think of how I just want us to be husband and wife already and hopefully, in 2 years, we’ll be able to get our dream home and start our family, which would be important for us to be married before any of those things. Thoughts? What would you tell your daughter if this was her?
Do what makes the both of you happy as long as u both are in agreement
Get married if you want to.
(I only read the first sentence.)
If you were my daughter, I’d tell you to stop being so worried about what other people think.
You love him, he loves you - you’ve got your lives planned out. You want to marry and have children.
No time like the present to get started!!
Honestly no matter what choice you make there will always be a family member that isnt happy about it… What your families think and how they feel only matter to an extent. At the end of the day it’s about what the both of u want
Go for it! Sounds like y’all are ok a good place.
U gotta stop worrying about what other people think,do what makes u happy
I got married at 20 while I was still in college. We had been together for 6 years. We already had 2 daughters at that point and now have our third. My first baby was in highschool and my second baby was in college. I still got my degree. We are now purchasing our forever home. There is no correct order to do things.
You do you. If you want to be married before kids, do that. Don’t worry about how other do it. Many people get married in their early 20s it’s not really too young, if you know you want to spend the rest of your life with the other person then get married. With the pandemic eloping might be a better option now anyway.
Id tell you live your life for you. It is your one and only life. Be happy.dont worry about what others think.its not their life. Dont let joy pass you up.life goes by fast, and tommorrow isnt promised.God bless you!
I got married at 22, he was 23. Been married for almost 8 years now. When you know, you know.
Follow your own heart, it’s your life and future. What you decide as a couple should be good enough for everyone
I’ve honestly never cared what anyone else thought. I got married when I was 20, had my daughter when I was 25 it worked for my husband and I. That’s all that matters. If you guys are good with the choices you make, that’s all that matters in the end
Sounds like you both are working towards things you want to accomplish together . I say elope 100% .
You’re over thinking it… and worrying too much of what others think. Are you two engaged? If you both want to get married then… get married
You are young and going to see many “go for it” posts on this page
I’m going to say don’t go for it.
Live. Breathe. Be. Experience life. There is no rush. You have time.
Don’t be in a rush to have kids before you have a chance to Experience what life has to offer.
Penis is abundant and of low value at every age for women
Personally, it sounds like y’all are ready. Just word of advice, don’t care what other people think. It will be the two of you married. No one else. You both will be taking care of finances, your life, your relationship and your future children. Sure people can offer advice but in the end it is THE TWO OF YOU at the end of the day. Good luck to you both
I was married at 22 and have been married 18 years. When you know, you know. Don’t worry about what others think. Follow your heart.
I got married at 23 and at the time I felt I was a little bit young too. We knew each other pretty much our whole lives but started dating right after I turned 18. We’ll celebrate our 11 year wedding anniversary in March and I love this man more than I thought I did then. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting married youngish when you’re not rushing onto it and you both sound like your on the same page and want the same things. It’s kinda nice to know that everything we have now- our own home, cars, kids, the whole thing, we’ve built from scratch together.
Do what makes you both happy. If you both want to get married then do that and don’t worry what other people think. It’s your life not theirs. Sounds like you have a good foundation. Keep living your dreams and follow your heart