I don't like the way my neighbor treats her kids: Is there anything I could/should do?

I’m at a loss. My neighbor is a friend of mine and I cannot stand the way she tears down her children. She doesn’t actually hit or physically abuse them but her and her husband are not very nice to them at all. She will call them names to their face or when they are near. Constantly puts down her oldest who is only 7 years old. He lies all the time because he is afraid of getting in trouble by her. She expects so much out of him and puts the world on this poor boys shoulders. She doesn’t even realize how badly she is tearing this child down and it breaks my heart. I can’t say anything to her because she won’t allow him to come over anymore and my house is a safe space for him. He spends most of his free time here and every weekend here. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can feel this childs pain. I look into this childs eyes and see the hurt. I am absolutley broken for him. What can I do? Is there anything at all?


Unfortunately I don’t think there’s a whole lot you can do unless there’s physical abuse. :confused:

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Speak up… I would.

Abuse is abuse. I would call a couple different resources and see what actions you can take to help


Be his voice because clearly his own parents aren’t for him. I understand your worry with them not letting him over anymore BUT he needs you to speak up. Maybe you could call his teacher and speak to her about this and maybe there’s a way she can get involved so it doesn’t look like the concerns are coming from you.

Nope. Not a thing you can do then mind your own business. I’m sure he will think I’m being mean to my son too but what they don’t see is what goes on behind-the-scenes.

say anything she’s going to lose her s*** on you too


Abuse is abuse, verbal, mental and emotional are just as dangerous and toxic. Perhaps inquire online about local child abuse organizations. They may better guide you but definitely do something. There’s nothing worse than just looking the other way when someone with no voice needs help.

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It sounds like Lateral Abuse…and Gaslighting…poor lil boy :(…and it sounds like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place…good luck

Just because they aren’t hitting him doesn’t mean they are abusing him, definitely call a child advocacy center and see what the say


I’d maybe try saying something to the mother in a respectful manner. She may not fully realize what she’s doing & the effects it can have.

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Just speak to your friend…she might not even know she’s doing it…maybe that’s how her parents were to her as a child so maybe she can’t see the issue? I’d deff speak up for the child’s sake

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Show him the kindness he deserves. Compliment him and show him how a mother should be. He will feel safe with you and will remember it. When hes old enough, it will be a shining example of how a parent should be.


Sounds like mental and emotional abuse. I would alert CPS because they can do an investigation without her knowing it was you.


Emotional abuse lasts a lifetime. I feel for you. This child and his siblings deserve to have a life without being emotionally abused and living in fear. Maybe he could tell a teacher or nurse at school, but he’d probably be too afraid to.

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Always keep your door open :heart:


Do not call anyone or confront her, there is absolutely no resources for parents who over yell at their kids. (I know first hand)Most states couldn’t careless about verbal abuse. Be his salvation when you can. You call someone then bye bye to him going over your house. Yes it is a form of abuse, but it isn’t the kind of abuse they do anything about. All you’ll do is make all kinds of drama just for him to stay in the same situation he is now. They don’t remove kids who get yelled at.


Not your circus not your monkeys. I’d stay out of it … mind your business :woman_shrugging:t3:


She is going to be defensive no matter what you say. I wouldn’t risk making her mad where she wont allow her children at your house. Just be his safe space and show him love while he is with you.


I have a friend like that, well not anymore. She is just mean to the kids. The boys, but the lil girl is soo bad n a liar. This woman drinks alot and cps is already involved. But of course , they dont see what is see. I dont even go to her house anymore. Her teen son is the babysitter, when she takes weekend trips and stays gone all night. I cant watch anymore

Hard to “mind your own business” when a child is involved. Call CPS anonymously and they will come to the house and hopefully that will turn their lightbulb on.