I feel guilty about having another baby: Thoughts?

I feel really guilty about having another baby. I have a 20-month-old daughter, and I’m due in a month with my son. I’m excited and happy about having another child, but there are times where I get really upset and feel guilty about having another one so soon. My daughter is my best friend, and she’s very clingy to me, and I don’t want her to feel replaced or like I don’t love her as much anymore. My son was unplanned, and I wish I had more time with it, just my daughter getting my attention. Is it normal to feel guilty?

21 Likes

My youngest two will be less than 14 months apart… I’m in the same boat.

Understandable but don’t feel guilty. Think of it this way, you’ll see your daughter become a big sister and that is wonderful. There’s always enough of mom’s love to go around.

3 Likes

Very normal. I have a 3 year old little girl and a 3 month old son. I still feel guilty from time to time but my babygirl knows I love her and I try to play with her and give her as much attention as I can. She gets jealous and that’s normal too.

1 Like

They r usually closer when there isnt a big age difference not always but my brother is only one and a half yrs older than me we r close

2 Likes

My sons are 11 months apart for the most part they got along pretty good

1 Like

I feel the same way, my daughter is 11months n she’s my bestest friend and my son is due here a few weeks . I’m so scared of how she’ll react to her baby brother. I’m also a lil sad it’s no longer gonna just be us lol. But I’m also beyond excited to meet my son :blue_heart::pregnant_woman:t3:

1 Like

Of course it’s okay to feel like this. Completely normal. It’s a worry you’ll change your feelings about your daughter or not love your son enough. Your love won’t change. You just realise you had it in your heart to also love another child the same amount. Just think how in the end you with have two little best friends and all the stuff you can do. Your daughter will love being a big sister. Encourage her to help. Get her a dolly and you can do everything together still. It’ll be a huge bonding experience her being involved with everything and giving her a life long best friend to play with. Dressing up becomes even more fun! It can be so amazing. You can still do so much together. Get a baby carrier or sling and then you’ll have your hands free for her times when baby is cuddley. Get her helping get nappies and wipes ready for changes. Included in Bath times and she can choose outfits for baby to wear daily. It’ll be adorable. Make a huge fuss about he becoming a big sister. It’ll be wonderful

3 Likes

I felt sooooo guilty before having my second with the same concerns. But seeing the way my daughter glued herself to her baby brother made it all melt away. I just make sure to have some time with her alone too~ it’s easier than you think! You’ll do good, you’re a good mama for worrying about this stuff. Your kids will be absolutely fine :heart:

1 Like

That’s normal, just make sure you still give her one on one time after you have your boy.

2 Likes

I have 2 daughters 14 months apart and they are the best of friends and especially when they were younger they were inseparable. They have 2 younger siblings as well. I was an only child until I was 15 and always wanted a lil brother or sister to play with.

I have three kids all under the age of 5 I feel guilty at times cuz some days one needs more attention than the other two but they know mommy still loves them they understand and most the time they want to try to help with new baby and it helps u guys bond too have her help get things to help with baby brother

Its ok momma… Just make sure you give her some mommy daughter time daily… Have her help you with the baby, and keep her feeling included and it will be ok… Promise

Yes it’s normal I have 2 girls 15 months apart the guilt towards the end of my 2nd pregnancy was filled with tears but they are best friends now 2 & 3 yrs old and the love they have is amazing to see …it’ll be ok and they will have a forever friend it’s hard but more than worth it

1 Like

Just let her help do as much as she can when the baby gets here. She can grab a diaper or the wipes. Just make her feel included. It will be fine. My boys are 14 months apart. They are best friends.

My brother and I are only 10 months apart and growing up it was so nice to have a brother so close in age. Don’t feel guilty in the end having siblings is better then being an only child and your daughter will end up being happy about it

I felt the same. Mine are 15 months apart. There is definitely some
Jealousy that will happen, just make sure your daughter gets alone time with you too. They will be best friends for life :slightly_smiling_face:

I felt guilty also. Like there was no way I would be able to give the same amount of love to my new child and I didnt want to take away from my oldest. Believe me, it passes as soon as you have that baby in your arms and big sister is gonna love him. Congrats

My 2 youngest children were born exactly 11 months apart (8/8/17 & 7/8/18)
I felt so guilty because my oldest daughter had to quickly transition from one little sibling to two in less than a year and my son wasn’t going to have a lot of time being the only baby. I felt like I was depriving him of his time being the baby. But once my youngest daughter was born I made sure to give each one of them one on one time and still do. It’s not always easy but it’ll be okay! My 2 youngest are the best of friends and inseparable. And my oldest daughter loves her little siblings to pieces❤️

My babies are about 24 months different and my daughter adores her brother shes more happy now than before