I feel like my husband isn't present when he is home: Advice?

I have been struggling lately with my current relationship. My husband and I have been married for almost four years now and have a one-year-old daughter. These issues have been going on since I became pregnant. My husband is a truck driver (so he is away a lot), and when he is home can be very busy. But lately, it seems that he is not present when he is home. Playing videogames, choosing to be out in the shop all day, and basically ignoring our daughter and me. He just doesn’t seem to want to spend time with us. When I bring up these issues, he will throw a fit about how he should just sell all his videogames. I’m not sure how to get through to him anymore. Am I right for thinking he should make more time for us? I need suggestions

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My BD does the same thing. It’s not wrong of you to want him to spend QUALITY time with the family.

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If you listed other things and he only heard the complaint about video games. Approach it different. You said he’s a truck driver gone alot. I’m sure when he’s home he wants some down time. Maybe plan some time while he’s off for family allowing him alone time to still relax before hitting the road again.

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Tell his harded headed self that family first then fun. Video games can come later. Explain to him that is daugter is growing up without him and he is missing it!

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I get it from both sides, he may just be tired of want some personal time to himself but also family time is important just bring it up to him! Communication can go along way!:slight_smile: hope ever gets better​:heart:

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I would have planned trips to do for when he is home. I would be gone somewhere when he asked me why I was never home when he is there I’d say will I guess I do not need my car or licence s if I can’t use them. Then I would ask him if any of that sounded familiar. Then calmly say I did not think you wanted family time all you needed I thought was your video games. Better to show them then try to tell them it may take a couple months but he will get it. Good luck and God bless.

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My husband drives truck and does this exact thing. I said during the week sure (he is home every other day) but on his weekends he has to do family time.

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He has another woman. Sorry but that’s what believe. When they loose interest it is a sign.

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My husband and I were/are going through something similar and a friend suggested we read The 5 Love Languages we have read it together and put in the efforts talked about and our relationship is making a 180 degree turn its a slow process but definitely opened our eyes and changed our perspective I was skeptical at first but it really has helped

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I threw out my husband’s computer. It’s an addiction.

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My hubby is a driver as well. We worked on a plan so he had down time where I understood. He gave me time away from Kidd as well even if it was limited as I needed that too. Come up with a plan but his job is hard and needs away time from it all as well. I always wanted to go out & be together and he wanted to be at home. We each gave a little and it worked. But communication is key.

Sadly he has a gaming addiction yes its real trust me i did research on it my husband has it and its taking a huge toll on our marriage n he has honestly slowed down tremendously prayers to you and your family

Maybe make the suggestion that you play some games with him (not sure if he is a PC gamer / console) and then he can do something with you that interests you. That way you both compromise and he might be more open to these conversations.

I don’t think anyone is “right” here. You obviously both have some emotions that are not being communicated and feelings aren’t wrong. Find a way to share with him calmly, allow him to share with you and if that doesn’t work go to therapy. Find a way you and him can do something together, that’s not parenting.

Doesn’t always means he cheating,he could stressed from work or something else is going on,talk to him and see what’s going on.
If you don’t have proof of him cheating don’t accuse him of it

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Create opportunities to bond…without force…and, resepect his need to have some time to himself, just as you probably need at times… “Long distance” relationships, or relationships where one person works away (military, police, truckers, etc) can become complicated over time because the people involved have to have a “lightswitch” of sorts… On when together, off when apart… They have to be able to function normally in both scenarios…which can be hard for everyone. If your vows were true, work on it…be patient, pray on it…

We own a trucking company. My husband is gone 3-weeks at a time. Girl he’s got another. Check out what spot he goes to regularly. Don’t fall the he’s depressed bullshit. Just saying.

My husband went through something like this. Found it UT was his job. He was very depressed. He would come home and it talk to anyone then go down the basement all night. Maybe he need to talk to someone to see. It isn’t easy but it helps. He is like a different person now.

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Maybe someone can watch the baby so you can have a real adult date night. You can even stay in. Play his video game with him, order some food. Better yet find some time to practice a two player race or fighting game and kick his butt at it when he plays! And maybe it’s not him, maybe it’s you. Practice some self care for yourself and see if you feel better.

When he says he should just sell his games id say im not saying that all im saying is you should spend some time with your family and if ur not able to do that then maybe things need to be changed