I feel like my husband may be cheating: Advice?

I’ve never actually written on here but have been in the group for a long time. I’m really fed up; I’m 46, and I’ve been married for 18 years with two adopted children (12&15 now). I feel my husband has no time for me, there’s no romance or intimacy anymore, and if I try to initiate, he just ignores me! My gut is telling me he’s cheating (he sis this to me 13 years ago). I also lost my sister to cancer just before Christmas, and I feel he hasn’t supported me with this at all. He’s very impatient and snaps at me if I do wrong, or he hasn’t had a good night’s sleep! It’s always about him and I’m Tired… I have been unhappy for a while but can’t afford to leave and rent a place plus I’d need to take my small dog as I can’t bear the thought of leaving her! I also can’t live like this though, it’s really getting me down! I’m not sure what I want from this post but I just needed to let it out!


Heres a thought…talk to your husband! Communication is key! :green_heart:


Guess it’s time to file for Divorce it’s new year and time to be happy… He will have to pay support so utilize funds to get your peace and stability… A women’s intuition is always right… Good luck and God bless


You have to trust your gut instinct! You may feel like you can’t leave and make it on your own but you can!!!
You are strong and need to be happy :two_hearts:
I was with my ex for 32 years and got a text saying he needed a break then after ignoring my calls, he worked out of town, he texted and said he had been seeing someone else for 2 years! It broke me. It changed my heart and soul forever!
But 3 years later I’m ok and am learning to be on my own.

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I feel this in my soul right now…

Don’t give him so much power.sounds like u try but he doesn’t meet u even half way.start with a plan.one step at a time.u r not a tree,u can move.make any move,it will make u feel better.there r Resourses available to women.google & see,not sure ur state.but never settle.take care


You do what’s best for you right now. I would get counseling first, while also working on getting yourself in a place to separate…if it comes to that.

You need to outright ask him if he’s cheating. You must tell him that you suspect he is. You must also take his actions as gospel. Many cheating men will say they aren’t, but they are. Being in an unhappy marriage is miserable. You have to have courage and know that you don’t have to stay in an unloving marriage. Even if he’s not cheating, he’s not giving you what you need in that marriage. Life is way too short to be unhappy.

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That (gut feeling) … listen !! Its never … ever wrong !!


Time to get serious - put it on the line. If you don’t get what you need kick him out take all the money out of the bank acct and get a good lawyer

I hate to be the b word here but I’m curious why you called them “adoptive” and why you didn’t mention not wanting to leave them. If he isn’t sleeping well maybe he is under a lot of pressure. Youve lost a sister and I’m sure that’s a terrible thing but if you look at it from his side maybe he’s under tremendous stress with the world the way it is and being the man of the house and the responsible leader of the family and maybe you’re different for those reasons too and losing a sister. Sometimes we miss that we are the problem. Just trying to be helpful. Best of luck to you.

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Save some mad money up and go to a different bedroom if he’s not willing then don’t sleep next to him

Stoooooppppp, you know already. Read your post! Then remove your personal business from social media girl. Sending prayers


Slow down and give yourself time to grieve before you make major life decisions. This is your choice I wouldn’t let strangers make it for you.

They are your kids you legally adopted them so they’re yours …my mother never referred to me as my adopted daughter…I was her daughter…always trust your gut …if people stopped and thought I can’t leave because of financial reasons they’d still be there now …you can leave take your kids (and the dog) and go …make a plan save money and do it ? If your so unhappy and he’s been like this a while stop wasting your time

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sorry for all the difficulties you seem to be going through right now. take a pause, grab a cuppa and settle down with a note pad - pen it all down, the good the bad and the ugly. then write down next to each statement the flip side of that - looking for the very best in each statement. whatever you are projecting to your husband - see where you have neglected and abandoned yourself - take back your power - you got this. Condolences for your loss - grieve the person you were a few minutes ago, and create the future you desire. have a listen to Caroline Myss when you have a chance. Hugs


Communicate. And always listen to gut instinct.

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Consult an attorney. Then, and only then make a plan. Your financial security is at stake. I know. I tried to be “friends” with my now ex husband during our divorce. And financially got screwed. I’ll have to work at least part time for the rest of my life.
Good luck :four_leaf_clover::+1:

Communicate with him. Seek counseling. Get proof. But after 18 yrs its going to be different. Period. Love is a choice.

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