I feel like my MIL doesn't care to spend alone time with my daughter: Advice?

My daughter (1-year-old) sees her grandparents about once a month. Only when we bring her to their house, and we live about an hour away. They never ask to see her or about her and half the time act like it’s an inconvenience to keep her. Meanwhile, they see my niece ( same age) 2-3 days a week and about 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday. They live closer and don’t have anything else to do. It really drives me crazy then, when we ask my MIL to have my daughter, my niece is there EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. Is it bad that I would like my daughter to spend some one on one time with her grandparents every once in a while? She only has one grandma. And being blunt about it isn’t an option because in the past, if we’ve brought up the unfairness, we just get told: “ we’re looking for problems”. In retrospect, I know this is probably a little bit of jealousy, but it doesn’t change the fact that my daughter deserves one on one time like my niece has 2-5 days a week…

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Your niece lives closer. You can’t honestly expect her to give up time with her grandchild who lives closer because yours lives far away. She probably has a closer relationship with her because she lives close too. Yes your daughter should have time with her too. Is it maybe just that she has an easier time keeping your niece because she has her so often and your daughter maybe doesn’t do as well?

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My MIL lived 5 minutes from my house & never in three years has she ever even asked to spend time with my kids. Her loss.

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I think you are starting unnecessary drama.NOONE owes you or your child ANYTHING accept you and the father to be really real…everything else is a bonus and should be appreciated.

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I feel you. It’s ridiculous. And when she grows up, she’s going to notice the difference. You won’t even have to point it out. (Don’t point it out). My kids get it. We are 20 min away. The other grandkids are an hour, and they see them every day.

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You are being unreasonable and demanding, they owe you nothing :woman_shrugging:

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Your daughter gets to spend time with her cousin as well as her grandma! :woman_shrugging: I don’t see a problem here!!!

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Stop pushing your child unto people who don’t want her! It’s their loss!

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Why would you want your daughter to be with someone who obviously does not want to be with her? It’s your MILs lose. I would not force anything. An hour is not that far. She would make an effort to she your daughter more if she wanted to.

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You cant force a relationship. Distance probably plays a big part in this. Are you going to drive the distance 3-4 times a week…prob not…are they…prob not…
If there has already been past issues like you say…then just let it go. Drama isnt worth it. Forcing a relationship will cause bigger issues than just letting it go

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As someone who has dealt with this, I know it hurts, but it’s not worth trying to force it. If they really wanted something to do with your daughter more often, they would try. And Do Not let them try to guilt trip you later when your daughter barely knows them because of their choices.

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My mother in law is blocks away from us and she never sees my kids ages 5 and 3 shes sees them maybe once every 4-6 months. I gave up with her and honestly it’s her loss. My kids dont even know who she is. In the long run shes the one missing out. They are her only grandkids. My kids have enough love with my family. Whenever she wants to see them she knows where we live.

Why force them to be in y’alls life if they want to do stupid crap like that? In all honesty I would just not even try. You cant force someone to do something

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I’m a grandparent here raising a granddaughter. And have another granddaughter that lives hr away. Way we work and they work we hardly get to see my other granddaughter. Sometimes when u live further away it’s hard for grandparents to watch ur child. In my opinion ur causing unnecessary drama. Let it be. Be thankful that what time they get see ur child.

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Could your MIL be tired from having the other child so often.

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The other kid is the golden child and your kid isn’t. Be glad. Toxic AS F

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That’s her problem not yours

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Trust me there are worse situations with grandparents. My daughter doesn’t remember any of her dad’s half.

WOW! I find it a bit unfair that they spend alone time with their other grand child but not with yours. Don’t waste time worrying about them. Raise your daughter as best you can and remember it is their loss that they won’t know her.

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Don’t go. Wait for her to call you

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