I feel like my mother in law plays favorites with kids: Advice?

How does everyone get on with their mothers-in-law? Particularly when you feel that she is favoring your Brother-in-laws children? I have a child from a previous relationship, and a child with this woman’s son; before her other son had a child, she would always favor her “actual” grandchild, even though she swore she accepted both of my children as her grandbabies. Now that her other son has a child, I feel like my children don’t even get a look in, and I don’t feel that its fair on my kids. She also plays favorites with her own kids and their partners. I know she hates me and loves the other daughter-inlaw, but I don’t feel that my kids should suffer because she hates me. Any advice would be helpful, please, I’m really at a loss.

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This is an easy one cut her out of the picture. I have been married for five and a half years and my mother-in-law has always played that with our children I had enough in about 8 weeks ago we completely cut her off. Now every single weekend she text as my husband begging for our children. Sorry Charlie not happening

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My mother in- law was like this for 5 years she is now almost like a friend lol almost we get along very well but it came down to an all out fight between her and me and my husband just said you two need to grow up !! She loves my babies with my husband but we had a problem with my daughter from another marriage she now treats her equal

Leave that situation. There is family out there that isnt blood related. My step mom (My Dads wife) would babysit other peoples children (not related) but didn’t want anything to do with my children. My Dad loves his grandkids. My step mom however I think is racist. My kids are mixed. We were neighbors at one time. First she didnt want them in the house and then the yard. It was ridiculous. I obviously stopped going and they are living in another state. I go because my my Dad makes it fun and we have fun but I dread being left alone with her. I won’t leave my children with her either. Protect your children. They are part of you. If she dont like you she will have the same against your children most likely.

Sometimes that happens when it’s not the same bloodline as hers, so you better get used to it. It will never change. Been there and accepted it bc I understand it now.

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I had the same thing except nobody from his family acknowledges my son at all. It’s their loss. My son is loved by me and his stepdad and his real dad and that’s all that matters

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Dont pay attention to her. If she dont hang out with your kids then your kids are better off without a person like that in their life. You love your kids and get to spend extra time with them f her!

Tbh & I know this is gonna sound rude but it sounds like you’re reaching and may be the jealous one. I can only assume from this post. It may be that you feel the attention is directed from your children because they don’t get 100% of her attention because she has other grandchildren. Which in her defense is fair . :woman_shrugging:t3: Also , how does one play favorites with their own children & their partners? You said she didn’t like you ? So why would she need to engage with you . Instead of asking a mom group. Why not speak to her directly and share your concerns . Could just be miscommunication & it Seems as if your communication is lacking which might be part of the problem

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My first thought is this. Some personalities mesh better. It’s not that you love the person any less. Just that you connect better. Its human nature. If you feel like your kids should see her more and think it’s your relationship stopping it than I suggest to be the bigger person and take your kids to her more often or be more available. Dont allow for your lack of a relationship to be an issue.

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So sorry you are feeling that way. I dont really have any advice. I know alot of people will just say “its her loss” or “your kids will realize when they are older” blah blah. Which may be true. But i think it affects the kids too. My brother and i lived that for a long time. I think it is a good start to set boundaries. Clearly defined expectations for them to be treated fairly and you as well.

To thine own self be true.