Trust me I’m in same boat, in my relationship he came with a child, i came with two, we had one 7 months ago and I’m 10 weeks pregnant now. My mom supports me and doesn’t say anything negative but other people have been negative towards me saying the same thing. We were in complete shock when we found out i was pregnant again. But the way i see it, God has a purpose and you are meant to be a mommy of four babies and that’s okay. Dont listen to the negativity. Everything happens for a reason and at the end of the day you are blessed! Keep going mama the babies are watching and love you!!!
I have 5 kids youngest is 8 I still have those crappy days it’s tough chicky you’ll get thru it
You need some new friends if that’s what being said to you WOW go online & find a moms group it’s a great outlet for support
I have two kids and I feel like this quite frequently. People are so quick to judge. Each child is different and we are all in different situations. Some people have easy children and lots of support so their lives don’t change much. Some have no support. Pregnancy on its own can be exhausting and having a hubby who works so much means you are having to do most of it on your own. I hope someone in your life will give you a hand. Bless you and your growing family.
If you can’t count on friends or family for help then hire some help.
It’s definitely overwhelming. The more I had, the less help I got lol. No one wants to babysit 4 kids. As they get older the needs change and you will have adult conversation again. Hang in there.
If a mom says she never feels overwhelmed then one of two things is going on 1) she is lying or 2)she has access to very good drugs, either prescription or thru self medicating.
I have 7 kids and I’m pregnant with our 8th. We wanted a big family and love having a big family. But I do feel very overwhelmed at times, especially when I am pregnant. Something about being pregnant and the hormone changes and everything… just adds to things and makes it easy to get overwhelmed by even the littlest of things. You’re human. Just because you choose to have children doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to ask for help or for time away from your children. Humans have needs, being mothers or not. If those around you can’t comprehend that, then you need to change who’s around you. My ex husbands sister has been an amazing help to me over the years, even though I’m not with her brother anymore and only 3 of my children are his. She still considers all my kids her nieces and nephews and if I call her, she will generally try to help. If I call my Ma (grandma), she will also help sometimes (usually for work related things, but still). I also have a good friend (I call him my cousin, because to me and the kids he is family and he’s always been there for us) that will always come over and help whenever he’s able to also. A lot of the “family” I depend on, isn’t actually biologically family. They’re friends that I know I can count on. You need to find some of those friends too, and cling to them with everything you have. Do exchanges too, you watch their kids so they can get a break, and then they watch yours so you can get a break. I love kid exchanges lol and the kids love it too!
I have 9 kids. Its almost a daily feeling. My fiance works 12-13hr days swing shifts. So 2wks he does overnights gone from 4pm till 6-630am and 2 wks days he is gone from 4am till 6-7pm. It sucks honestly…i moved states away from my family and friends so i literally know no one here.
I’ve been a mom for 30 years… My oldest is 30 and youngest is 14… I still get overwhelmed… But just keep your kid alive… Give them food and water… Hugs and kisses… Days will get easier…
I have and we plan for another soon and just thinking about it. Scares me because of this.
I think all moms have felt like this at some point. Don’t let anyone tell you to suck it up. You’re a mom but you’re still human. You need to try to get out once in a while, even if it’s just lunch with a friend. I have taught my children that as much as I love spending time with them, I require time by myself. I’ll have them go play video games for an hour while I eat I’m bed. I’m currently 9months pregnant with my 3rd so I understand where you’re coming from. My point in this is simply, take care of you so you can take care of them.
Almost every Mom feels that way at some point. Raising kids is hard. Make time for yourself. Little things can help a lot. Date night. Coffee or drinks with friends. Just going for a drive.
Having one kid can feel overwhelming, so 3 littles & being pregnant? You are definitely entitled to feel overwhelmed. I salute you.
Build your village to help you. Find babysitters in the neighborhood, church, family, neighborhood bulletin boards (physical and online ones), friends, family, and ask for recommendations from everyone. Having a helping hand or two so you can grocery shop or just pee by yourself can be wonderful.
You can’t pour from an empty pitcher, so schedule time for you and for just you & your man. With 4 kids you may need 2 babysitters at a time. Two teens who are friends could work well. I had two rambunctious kids and one neighbor girl would wrangle the one and the other neighbor girl would take the other.
Talk to other adults on the phone for 15-20 minutes while you are doing something fairly mindless, or read or work crossword puzzles while supervising homework so you get some adult mental stimulation.
Enlist the kids to help with chores (age2-3 seems when they enjoy imitating you the most). Loading unbreakable items in the dishwasher, washing machine or dryer, dusting, helping push the vacuum, folding washcloths and matching socks, stirring, pouring, pushing buttons on kitchen appliances, etc. Check FlavCity recipe videos for how to include little ones in cooking. Kids get a sense of accomplishment and eventually are ready to be responsible adults. Stickers on a chore chart can be reward in itself or you can give prizes for weekly accomplishments.
Make sure dad helps in some ways too. Bath & story time, supervising kids to have their dirty clothes in a hamper, clean clothes in bins or on shelves and toys put away in toy boxes at the end of the day (with appropriate chore chart stickers for good work).
I’d say have a glass of wine, but you’re pregnant, so make it grape juice. And once this one is born, use birth control consistently so you’re not surprised again.
Omg I am going threw the same thing but im having my 3rd! With everything going on, homeschooling and taking care of a 3 year old. Im overwhelmed as well. You got this mama, Even when it seems impossible. Yo will be able to handle whatever is thrown at you xx
Depending on how you feel and if you can afford it see if you can afford to have help either in home or have one day a week where the older ones (or all 3) go to a daycare!
I had my 3rd 4 months ago. I also have a 5 yr old and a 1 1/2 yr old. My 3rd was much sooner than we planned and I was completely caught off guard, overwhelmed, stressed, sad, happy, every other emotion I could have felt, I did. It was a rough start but once she was born I fell into it just like I did my other 2. There are very rough days but there are also beautiful days. You will get through and just know its OK to have rough ones.
Everyone needs help at some point. Don’t never let anyone make you feel like a lesser person. Keep your head up your doing a great job
Most days and people who say they don’t, are liars!
Whoever is telling you that is wrong. It is absolutely okay to admit to feeling overwhelmed. Reaching out for help if you need it is the best thing you can do for yourself and your kids. If you can’t find support from your family or friends, talk to your doctor- he or she will listen and direct you toward the support you need.
Unfortunately, I have learned that the words from others like, " if you ever need help, let me know" or the “why didn’t you just ask me for help, after the fact” is all words!! It is only a very small amount of people who actually mean it!! Lol so yes, I have!! All I can tell you is, do the best you can, and take at least a few hours a week for you!! Even if it’s late night grocery shopping, a walk in your own back yard, especially when you are feeling overwhelmed!! And BTW, no shaming but get those tubes tied