I feel unloved and unwanted: Advice?

I have been with me FH for 2 years, we are supposed to be getting married this year. Issue is, i feel so unloved and unwanted by him recently. We haven’t been intimate in over 2 weeks… any time we argue i try to sit and talk it out and he shuts down and refuses to engage or discuss anything. I have cried so much the past few months. I love him and i want to make this work but he refuses therapy and says i need to get out of my own head and stop creating issues…he calls me names when we fight and always blames me and never acknowledges when he hurts me. when is it time to walk away even if you love someone with everything you have? Is this fixable?

14 Likes

It’s not fixable if only you are trying to fix it…NOW is the time to walk away you deserve to feel loved and wanted EVERY SINGLE DAY!

11 Likes

If you can’t see yourself or bring yourself to ending it now, you definitely need to postpone that wedding to work out those issues. Growth exists. It could get better but the fact that you’re seeking advice on when to leave says you know you deserve better & that you should probably leave sooner rather than later. If any part of you is saying to leave, listen to it!

5 Likes

You can’t fix an asshole.

If it’s only been two years and your still not married I think id see how it leads. If you’ll truly be happy or not. I married young to a older man and ended up having two children by him. ( Now the not sharing feelings, not talking about it shutting you out ect must be a guy thing, because all I men I’ve known has been that way!) Anyhow, the name calling issues don’t get better! My husband calls me a bitch, honestly after 11 years it doesn’t hurt me now, yes I’m a bitch the biggest red head bitch you’ll ever see, is what I say to him. Wait untill your married, now you can’t talk about marriage problems. Especially if your not the first wife. ugh they get the better husband on that part lol. I’ve had a few more older men in my life. One died in an accident. The other I left for my husband. He was a grown man having me pack his lunch for work. Getting up for him to go to work then me school. Video games then and now is his life other than work ya what a surprise! Anyhow. think about the f,uture. If this continues will you truly be happy and have a happy family!

Do you have anxiety? I used to create problems in my head all of the time!!! Not saying he is right at all. But my anxiety has ruined a few of my relationships. Counseling would definitely help you two if you guys love one another so much! Best wishes hon

4 Likes

You don’t call someone you love names. He doesn’t love you. Get out mow

1 Like

Marriage ain’t a bandaid. Those red flags are there for a reason, head their warning. If you feel unloved now, just wait till the hard times hit.

3 Likes

Get out now name calling is verbal and emotional abuse. He is a an abusive narcissistic fucktart. You are entitled to better treatment than that.

7 Likes

I treat mine how he treats me. It took a long time but we are good now. If he’s worth it work on it because some people think different than you. What might be an issue to u might not be too him

1 Like

I just ended a 4yr relationship that was like this… Walk away plz you dont want to keep trying when he dont give a shit!

Sweetie if you’re not seeing the signs just re-read this post. Just cause y’all wanted to get married doesn’t mean y’all have to. Be smart and don’t enter into a compromise or something you may feel is the next step unless y’all are both truly happy. I called off my wedding the morning of because deep down I was so miserable. We can’t change men only they can when they want to & lately all I’ve met are grown ass men having temper tantrums if they don’t get their way. Think it thru before making the long term commitment. Love you and be happy for you. You can’t carry the both of y’all. No compromise! A relationship must be earned whole heartedly

Calling someone names and expecting things to be fine…is narcissistic behavior. Been there and lived it. Move on :ok_hand: He won’t change

1 Like

Yes really think hard
I hate to day stress does alot. You pull away for many reasons

1 Like

Yes don’t put up wit name calling. Once it starts they dont stop!

1 Like

If he treats you this way now than it will get much worst after you marry him. Walk away unless he is willing to change

4 Likes

Could be he dont want to get married ever! Or there is another girl in the picture.

3 Likes

It was time to walk away months ago. Prove is wrong and actually do it :woman_shrugging:t4:
Stop trying to make it work. It’s over.

For her

Because you didn’t want to lose him, you lost yourself in the process. You became a girl who kept being mistreated and you formed a habit of saying “I’m used to it”. You became a girl who kept being unappreciated and you begin to tell yourself “it’s okay”. You became a girl who kept being undervalued and you learned how to say “I’m fine”. You became a girl who kept being put last and you naturally reacted with “it’s whatever”. You became a girl who kept being taken for granted and you dealt with it by repeating “everything’s ok”. You became a girl who kept being unhappy and you regularly told people “I’m going to be fine”…And if you’re reading this right now, then you need to understand that no guy is worth losing yourself for, no guy is worth suffering for at the expense of your happiness! So KILL your old self and focus on YOU! GET YOURSELF BACK❤
#SelfLove #BestLove #DepressionFree

Idk what a FH is but…if he’s already treating you that way it’s never gonna change