I found out my husband is talking and flirting with his exes: Advice?

I want to ask for advice anonymously. My husband and I have been married for 3 1/2 years, I have two children from a previous marriage, he has one from a previous marriage, and we have a one-year-old together. When I got pregnant - it was unplanned- he blamed me and was resentful. He refused intimacy throughout the pregnancy and until the baby was ten months old. I felt awful, rejected, and disregarded. Moving forward about four months ago, we talked and agreed to work in our marriage, and had been doing so successfully. Until about a week ago when I found out, he has been texting and talking to former girlfriends, flirting and sexting. He even met up with one of them while out of town. He claims nothing physical happened, and they are just friends. He says I have nothing to worry about, that he only reached out to them because I have been too tired and busy to give him the attention he needed lately - the children have been sick, our son was hospitalized, I myself was sick and we have had family visiting. We both work full time, but I do all the childcare and housework so that with all the sickness and visitors left me too tired for anything but sleep at bedtime. This is not the first time I have caught him doing this, but he has never met with them in person, or at least not that I know of. And one of them is the same person he was talking to the first time. We talked about it, and he promised never to contact them again and to talk to me when he feels like I’m not affectionate enough. The thing is I am hurt and honestly disgusted if his behavior. My gut tells me it won’t change and will just get worse. However, he’s the father of my youngest, and I feel I should try to work things out for him.


Dump his ass. Idk why it’s even a question. He has done nothing to raise you up, and he’s done this before. Move on.

He’s done with you. You need to be done with him

Edit- that came out harsher than I meant it…but I did mean it. Good luck, sis :heart:


LEAVE. A REAL MAN will love you unconditionally and not make you feel bad for not giving him attention 24/7. He’s a pig.


If you need closure…you should reach out out to the girl and ask if it was physical.


Emotional cheating is cheating. Sexting other women is cheating. Hiding who theyre talking/texting is cheating. Secretly meeting up with people is cheating. You decide if you want to keep allowing him to disrespect you.


Leave. Leave now. Red fucking flags dude

He did it again I you still want to stay and don’t say it’s because of your son you left your other kids’ father you can do without him too


Your gut is probably right…


I’m sorry but you need to cut your loses. He doesn’t give a f**k about you and is actually trying to blame you for him, meeting with an ex. A proper narcissist


My heart aches for you. I would feel at a loss if I were in your shoes. It doesn’t sound like he takes your relationship seriously, just because there has been a small dry spell, is no excuse to go searching elsewhere for that attention. I would feel like I couldn’t trust him. You need to be open and honest about how you feel, and give him the opportunity to be honest and make a choice, his behaviour would have me questioning things.

Girl, he withheld intimacy for over a year and a half from you but then when life happens he goes and cheats? Noooo… be done. He’s manipulating you big time and treating you lie garbage. Just be done.


Nothing happened when he met his ex! I hope you don’t believe that. You need to get away from him!


If its not worth it don’t even try … once a man does this there’s no trust …is that what you want father or not if he loves his kids then he should change

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Ask yourself what you would tell your child to do


Hey emotionally checked out from you. Walk away and save your self. Hes not willing to stick by yourside in your worst days.

He sounds like a dick in my opinion. Like he made his decision years ago. Counseling?

Your crazy if you stay

In doing what he has done he’s shown time and time again he has no respect for you or how you feel its all about him and his feelings he sounds pathetic, is that the best you can do for yourself? Also staying for your child won’t help in any way all they will see is their mummy is a door mat teach your child to be strong by showing them how to be the situation will only cause misery in the long run and life is to short


Girl, just cut your losses and run.