I got pregnant and found out the childs father was married: Advice?

So after I got pregnant, I discovered the father of my child was married. I’m a very timid person and do not like conflict, so I asked him to walk away to spare his wife. He is not on the birth certificate but says he wants to be in his daughter’s life secretly and doesn’t want to walk away. She is almost seven months old. I filled for cs, and he flipped out, saying I was destroying his life, so I closed the cs case. He hadn’t seen her since October because he lived in another state and was in my state briefly for work when I got pregnant. I believe my daughter deserves more than this. He has sent money, but I am not after that and want him physically in her life more than financially. I’ve been thinking of cutting all communication with him and forcing him to walk away since he can’t man up and tell his wife or manage to come to see his child. Am I wrong for this? I just don’t like the hovering and never knowing what’s going to happen next.


File for child support and fck what he thinks or says! He NEEDS to financially support that child! Maybe he shouldn’t have strayed from his marriage but it’s NOT your problem!


Ask for all or nothing. Go to court and get scheduled visitation. If he doesn’t withhold his end of the bargain then break it off completely. Your daughter does deserve a full time father. Not just when it’s convenient


You need to tell his dang wife before anything else :woman_facepalming:t3: you’re sounding like a doormat


Do the child support. He screwed up his marriage when he decided to have an affair.


You are in the right track keep it up! Its be in your daughter’s life physically or not all… :clap:

I was apply child support and I would tell his wife. How dare he


You shouldn’t make him leave his wife but I agree file for child support if his wife finds out o well he shouldnt have cheated


Do what’s right for you and your child, file the child support, it is his responsibility to step up, if he didn’t want this outcome he shouldn’t have done it simple, if you cheat and get someone pregnant take the fall for it.


Tell him to either sign the form to walk away legally or file for child support.
You didn’t ruin his life… he did. If he loved his wife he wouldn’t be in this situation.

Don’t let him float in and out as he sees fit. Your daughter deserves better.


Tell his wife! And then file for child support. Screw him. Hes a pos cheater.


Go after child support she deserves it anf his wife should know


Explain to him that if he can’t afford time for his child, he doesn’t need to be around. That your child doesn’t need what I call a “lightswitch father” who only comes around at his own convenience and by allowing him to choose before you choose for him you’re protecting your baby.


File for child support and file for custody. He needs to man up. Your child deserves to know her father and his family


Sometimes its best to let them be.
If your child wants contact when older then thats upto them to decide.I would take and Save the money in her own account for when shes older.

His wife needs to know and he needs to step up. It wont be the end of the world when she finds out. Life Will go on and it will work out. Its not your fault he cheated on his wife.


File for child support, your child deserves it, I’d be telling his parents they have another grandchild too, not fair that they are missing out, wife needs to know, cause who knows if he has other children to other woman too.


Get your child support and cut him off tell his wife and walk away x

You need to forget him. If he were a real man ready to father your child he would bring it to his wife. You shouldn’t be the only one paying. Esp if he wants rights.

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You need to file for full custody and explain in detail to the judge. If the judge gets that the child is kept a secret by him you will get full custody.