I had a stillborn and feel like no one cares: Advice?

In June, I had a stillbirth delivery, and it was devastating. Not only dealing with grief but feeling alone. I have a husband and four children already, and everyone in my family, especially my husband, just wants me to act like it’s no big deal. I have heard everything from “You already have children.” to “It’s probably for the best.” I just can’t believe my own family can be so insensitive towards me. After the delivery, I was left alone in the hospital. No one in my family visited me, called me, or even so much as sent a text. Smh. My husband called a few times and only came when it was time for me to leave. I am not sure if I am overreacting to their actions because of postpartum grief, or if I am justified in feeling upset. I really need advice on how to cope because I am starting to feel resentment.

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Your pain is real and you do need support and someone should have been there with you.

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Would you say “its probably for the best” to a parent who’s 3 or 6 or 12 year old died? Or even if their baby was 5 hours old!? How heartbreaking!! I’m so sorry momma! Prayers for healing!

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Your husband wasn’t even there? Um… time to get a new husband AND family… that’s so fucked up

My heart goes out to you i am so sorry

My heart breaks for you and I am so sorry you are dealing with this alone. Most people dont know what to say but they still should have been there to listen or at least just to hold you.

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Most people do not understand and have no idea how to handle this horrible situation… I felt the same way… Find other mothers who have been through it… And pray for those who have never gone threw it… Pray they never know your pain…I am so sorry for your great loss…

Yes you are mourning and so is your husband. He lost a baby also. I would seek counseling for you both. You’re both dealing with your grief separately instead of together

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You’re feelings are valid. I’m sorry they werent more supportive.

No not overreacting at all. Your feelings are valid. Please consider getting some therapy to help you with your loss/grief. Hugs!! :heart:

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You didnt just lose a child. You lost all the could have beens and should have beens. First smiles, first coos, first words. Birthdays, holidays and everything in between. Your grief is so so valid and dont ever apologize for it. I lost my daughter at 17 days old due to complications of prematurity. Give yourself time to grieve. Feel free to PM in u ever need to talk about feelings. Will pray for you and your sweet baby

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I am so sorry for your loss :pensive: You have every right to be hurt and upset.

I couldn’t even begin to imagine what you are going through. Neither can the people you are referring to. But it’s different for you. You had an actual bond with your baby. You’re allowed to grieve over your loss. Everyone grieves in their own way. Maybe your husband disconnected like that because it was his way but regardless you both lost a child and should talk about how you are feeling with him. As for the others I can’t really say much- yes their comments are insensitive but they probably don’t know what to say to you and probably should’ve said nothing over insensitivity.

Everyone deals with grief differently. You are justified in hurting and being upset. I would bet your husband is in denial and can not handle the hurt and grief in a loss like this.

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Sounds like you are surrounded by a bunch of selfish, ignorant people.
Try to get some professional help on how to deal with your situation.
Good luck
God bless

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First I’m so sorry for your loss. No matter if it was your 1st or 100th child it was still your child. You will and need to grieve the loss of a child and the life you thought you would have. You need someone to be your support, someone to lean on. I’m so sorry that your family wasn’t there but please reach out for help. you went through something very tragic and traumatic.

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I’m so so sorry for your loss. You have the right to feel the way you do. You created and carried this baby for months and you lost him/her at delivery. I think everyone is being very insensitive and maybe you can seek counseling to be able to express your feelings and have someone
Listen to you. They can help you cope with this loss. You definitely need some support.

I’m so sorry!! Your pain is valid!! I think they are being insensitive as heck!

Sometimes you dont need others just to justify how it feels like. But nonetheless you have to have a brave heart to continue your life. This is just a stumble not a destination.

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Your angel baby is watching over you with wings spread high you know in your heart baby will always be with you celebrate the flutters and feelings only you shared with your baby. Nobody will understand and everyone will have something to say stay away from negative people and hug your littles a little tighter💜