I have anxiety and depression and cannot tell if I am over reacting: Advice?

Am I being ridiculous? I’m upset with my partner because they went to a place with their family that I expressed just last week wanting to go to. When I said how I felt, they responded “I’m not going to not go with my family so we can go for the first time.” This hurts my feelings more because they totally could have said ‘no thanks, my girlfriend really wants to go with me. I’ll wait until I can go with her.’ My birthday is Monday, and at this rate, I’m questioning whether they will even come to my bday party or get me anything. Keep in mind, I struggle with severe depression and anxiety w/panic attacks, and I’m waiting on med refills. I cannot tell if I’m overreacting or if my feelings are valid. I told them I didn’t want to talk for a bit because I needed to gather my thoughts. I didn’t want to say something that would make me look like an ass while I was in such an emotional state. Please, no bashing. Am I in the wrong and just overreacting due to my mental health shit?

21 Likes

Beyond overreacting…

4 Likes

Why couldn’t you go with them?

6 Likes

You’re allowed to be upset if that’s how you feel.

1 Like

How come you didn’t go with them did they go behind your back and do it or did they tell you they were going and you just didn’t want to go with them but just your boyfriend?

1 Like

If you have kids and this was the kids first time going and you didn’t get to go with them, then I could see being upset. Otherwise let it go. You can still go on your own with your bf and it will be your first time.

3 Likes

I’m going to say ur overreacting. By u saying I don’t know if they will come
to my party or get me anything makes me believe u are this way often. I have a feeling u are a it’s all about me type of person. I get that ur upset. But u should be discussing that with ur man. Not his family. U need time to gather ur thoughts?! Where did he go that was so special without u that would make u this upset?!

7 Likes

Personally, it sounds like it was important to you to experience it with your partner. So I think your feelings are valid, it wasnt fair for your partner to sideline your feelings. As someone who suffers similar mental illness symptoms I know I’ve questioned myself over things like this.
Now that’s passed you just have to accept it was something you cant change and cope. I feel like maybe the birthday bit is more overthinking related to your symptoms.
I hope you get to go with your partner and they understand just how important that experience is gonna be for you, and make your first time going special

3 Likes

You’re overreacting. This is an adult, not your child’s first something that you’re missing. The only problem I see is if he’s unwilling to go with you now. THAT would be a huge problem.

3 Likes

I would be upset too. Im sorry that happened :cold_sweat:

1 Like

Why wouldn’t you go with them when they all went??

2 Likes

You’re feelings are valid but expecting him not to spend time with his family because of the location is a bit much. You are probably upset for not being included in the first place and your subconscious is reaching. Mental illness is awful and it was smart of you to take a step back and question yourself.

4 Likes

Just cause you couldn’t go doesn’t mean they shouldn’t go and spend time with their family. Yeah it may suck youre unable to go but you’re an adult and shouldn’t make them feel bad

You are allowed to have your own feelings, i feel like it’s not that big of a deal though, you can still go for YOUR first time where ever it is, and it shouldnt make it any less special because it was something you really wanted to do, don’t let them ruin that just because they went, so what they went your next, and you’re gonna enjoy yourself :woman_shrugging:t3:

I dont think it’s over reacting, if he knew you wanted to go he should have declined or called you to ask to meet them or see if it was okay, not because your his boss for anyone who cries fowl, but because he should have a shred of respect for your feelings.

Don’t know all the info on this so, Pick & Choose your Battles.

1 Like

I think you’re overreacting… you are expecting your partner to exclude themselves from family gatherings to appease your desire to visit said place. You can always go there with your partner, where family gatherings might not be as frequent as your time together. You wouldn’t tell your partner “no I don’t want to eat there cause you ate there with your mom” because that sounds ridiculous right??? But that is how you are reacting. Good luck. Go to the places, do the things, eat the foods and be happy

2 Likes

Girl you’re an adult lmao … and still expecting to be showered with gifts from your mans family lol … I think that’s more of something for YOUR friends and family to be doing. Just because you’re with a man, doesn’t mean his family needs coddle you lol

5 Likes

I think you may be over reacting. It’s just a resturaunt 🙍 and your partner absolutely can go places with his/her family without you.

Like you said you struggle with depression and anxiety…I wouldn’t say overreacting but I think you need your meds refilled asap . People who suffer from this are extra sensitive to certain things and sometimes obsess on things to get control. This is completely normal. Hope that you get your meds taken care of.

4 Likes