I’ve been a stay at home mom for the last several years. I have five kids. My relationship with my other half has been rocky. I forgave a lot that I shouldn’t have simply because I didn’t love myself. Now that I’ve been working on myself this last year, my feelings for my other half aren’t there anymore. I’m always thinking about how dirty he’s done me. And even though he’s been better the last two years or so. He still doesn’t appreciate anything I do. Or value me. I know leaving is the best. But I also know he’s gonna try and guilt me into feeling sorry for him. This isn’t gonna be easy. I’m gonna be a single mom to 5 kids, basically with nothing to my name. (We aren’t married, and almost everything is technically his) … I need some kind, encouraging words. Advice etc. I love him. Always will. But I’m not in love with him. I’m finally choosing happiness. For so long, I just wanted to give my kids a family dynamic, but it’s not healthy for them either, and I’m ready to break the cycle
It is amazing and so healthy that you can see all of this now and are ready to begin a new life with your children. You are so strong and intelligent. It will be hard at first but you’ve got this. There is no reason to remain in a relationship where you are not valued. I don’t know if you are planning to return to work. I know there are places that offer training for employment or will send you to school. Churches will help out. There are groups you can join for support. Reach out for help when you need it. It will be okay and you should be so proud of yourself.
Good! You can do this!
Good for u for seeing this. Its not gonna b easy but u got this. U can do it. Wishing u all the best!!
Good for you mama. I’m sure it took so much to finally make that decision. You should be proud of yourself for doing the right thing for yourself and your children. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Being in the process of building yourself back up is a brand new start. Your life is your own after all.
Good on you for having the courage to take this step .
SPEAK to a lawyer re property , deoending on where you live , you may find that you are entitled to a fair % of his assets .
Laws are different everywhere , so that is why you need to talk to someone where you live.
Part of “ working on yourself “ is the need to start over sometimes. It won’t be easy , but remember where you have been! Once you start doing more and more for yourself you won’t look back. Best wishes!
There are tons of programs out there to help people in similar situations. You can do this. Your kids deserve a happy mom
If it’s really over for you, nothing he says will penetrate your heart. Dont say things you cant take back or that will make it worse for the kids or him. It’s hard to start over but the first step is the hardest. Once you’ve done that then it’s just one step in front of the other. Love your kids more than you dislike each other and respect them in front of the kids always. The best gift you can ever give your children is respecting their other parent. I hope you are ok. You will do great because you are great! Xoxo
I moved from my ex with two kids and my clothes in carton boxes while he was at work and I never looked back
Depending on where you are at, even if you aren’t married but have conducted in a manner as a married couple, you may actually have the benefits of a married couple. Check with your state laws. I know it’s scary to leave something you’ve been at but whatever makes you happier, that’s all that matters.
Every heart know it’s own sorrows. Be strong. God your father will be there with you.
You just described my life hunny. Pretty much to the T. Good luck. Keep strength and your resolve. We are better than empty words and broken promises.
Remember that starting today, it will now be better than yesterday… Be happy
Good for you !! If he’s been abusive in any way contact Womens aid they’re brilliant…go to your local council they can help you too …it will be hard …you sound like a strong woman…you’ll be ok and so will your kids good luck
You already said it was over. I was going to recommend couples classes. Then if he wasn’t willing let him go. It’s always best to do everything in your power to keep the relationship going. Sounds like you love him but not his ways. I went through that. My husband wouldn’t go to no type of consuling. I went but he didn’t. Long story short. It wasn’t until after I left that he changed. Was gone for 4 months . I stopped the divorce I started. This past Aug. It’s been 31 years now. The grass isn’t any greener on the other side. Not that I was looking or even enters. We’ve been doing fine. But he wasn’t listening to me before I left. He didn’t realize what he lost until he didn’t have me anymore.
I’m a DV survivor and a single mom of 6 children. Four of my children are under the age of 5. I was with my partner for many years. The abuse was horrible. Do not let him gaslight you into thinking you are crazy or that it’s your fault he can’t emotionally regulate himself. Abusive people seek out kind hearted people for the sole reason of knowing they can manipulate your feelings and take advantage of your good nature. They also make you feel like you can’t do it all on your own. Well let me tell you, YOU CAN and YOU WILL!!! It will be tough, but leaving is the best decision you could ever make for you and your children. If you ever need to talk, you can PM me. I wish you all the strength and success as you try to navigate this new chapter in your lives. Many blessings to you.
Best advice I can give you is to get a good Attorney and stay single until your kids are of legal age. Any man you bring home puts you and them in danger.
How can a person ask a fan question here?
I commend you for taking the first step into your happiness. I would caution that it’s not easy but nothing worth it ever is. There will be days when you want to turn back it’s hard but just keep looking up and forward. God will provide all you need lean unto him and him only. Much love sister.