I haven't been in the mood for sex since I gave birth: Advice?

I just had my 3rd baby a few months ago. Ever since the first baby I’ve had an issue with my sex drive. My husband is constantly throwing a fit about it or in a bad mood because he’s sexually frustrated. My question is, has anyone else experienced this? Has your doctor prescribed anything to help? Can you take it while breastfeeding? I’m desperate and don’t want it to ruin my marriage.


Simply just have sex


I didnt get my sexdrive back until the 6 month mark. Around 4 months my husband and I started having sex again maybe once a month.

I struggled with this with my first born. It took me almost 2 years to get right. I still had sex with my husband but he knew I wasn’t in the zone. You can talk to your doctor, but in my opinion it just takes time. You had a baby, your 3rd one to boot. You’re tired, you’re going through hormonal changes yet. It sucks yes, but we have to heal in more ways than one

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I just had my six baby 2 weeks ago and ever since I had my fourth baby I have no sex drive like I don’t want sex I don’t want anything to do with it but my fiance’s throws a fit and gets mad everytime I turn it down it’s just I have no sex drive I’m going to ask my doctor about some medicine or something to help

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Without wanting to sound crude If it was me, I would let him sort himself out with me there.Having sex after a baby is hard but he still needs to feel wanted. Maybe more foreplay. Xx


I’ve always heard the more you’re in the mood the more you’re in the mood. Maybe try some private mommy time occasionally?

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Horny goat weed.
It’s a natural viagra for both sexes, along with other health benefits as well.
As far as it being safe for breast milk, I’m not entirely sure!

If he helps more with the housework and kids he might get laid more. Js.


Some women don’t get their sex drive back until they are done breastfeeding. I wasn’t one of them. I come home from pushing the baby out wanting wiener. (Weird). I know some times it take hormones to adjust and some days I have that " I have been touched to much" feeling and I just want to be left alone.

Definitely lube because hormones breastfeeding might make you a little dry.
But also if you’ve seen the memes about chore-play… Because if you’re exhausted by the time the baby is in bed you won’t be in the mood. But if he’s helping out without you having to ask or ask more than one you’re probably more willing to end up in the mood.

My question. Is how long in between

It took about 5 years to get mine back x

Well you’re not gonna feel in the mood if youre touched out and hes throwing a hissy fit. What steps has he taken so you can feel like a desirable person to yourself and not just mom and milk supply? What intimacy is he providing? Sounds like he wants a wife appliance to service his needs and not a human person.


Maybe he needs to stop nagging you for having sex. Let you recover and when you are ready for intimacy it will be easier. What’s he going to do when you hit menopause? You dont have a care in the world for having sex. Trust me.


I went through the same thing. Try new things and just explain to hubby it’s not him you just aren’t feeling it. My doc said it was an off version of post partum. We tried new things and I got my groove back. :two_hearts::pray: it won’t ruin your marriage but it could change it for the best. Sure did with mine. Best wishes

Been there done that, I realized it was because of all of the time and energy focused on the kids, I was not interested at all in sex but I gave my now ex pleasure other ways, orally or by hand. I made sure he knew I loved him but had no physical desire for sex. I also realized I was depressed, you should talk to your doctor about depression, postpartum depression is very common and nothing to be ashamed about.


It’s hard to get in the mood when your instincts evolve around keeping your baby alive and nurtured. I had to be out of our home entirely to get in the mood. In the beginning we would leave our son with my mother and we would go to a hotel for a weekend. It can be expensive but this really helped me get in the sex zone again. Three years later and it still not the same like when it was my husband and I but we at least do it twice a week or every other week.

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My sex drive came back after I left him :joy::joy:


Some people it never comes back. I also have 3, our youngest is 4 yrs old. I have a ridiculously high drive so thankfully I didn’t have this issue, but I would recommend not listening to the people who say ‘he just has to deal without it’. To a point yes obviously, but definitely talk to your Dr bc you stated its been several years like this. There are a million contributing factors, however it sounds like you had more desire and becoming a mom changed that. It really does happen, especially if he’s not so helpful around the home and with the kids. Best wishes and happy holidays!