I recently left a toxic relationship, where I found him to be cheating, and he was becoming increasingly more distant and aggressive, so I decided to leave. I moved in with a friend and took time for myself before finding someone new who has been a healthy and loving experience as far as in terms of a relationship. The ex now has attempted to contact me in any way possible, but he is blocked. Recently I have heard he is homeless and a drunk. I felt bad and attempted to communicate to bring him out of the situation he was in hopes he would try to think more positive, but now he blames the whole situation on me. He wants me to come back and to make him happy, says his life is not worth living, and he will continue to live the way he does until I do. He recently has found out where I am located, and I worry that he will attempt to find me. My question is: what do I do? The last time I tried to contact a person or his family to notify them of his condition, they blamed me and chewed me out. However, I also know he is unpredictable and doesn’t put it past him to do something. Do I quit engaging and hope for the best? Or attempt to find help?
I want you to sit back and picture yourself with this person now. Are you happy or regretful that you have set yourself backwards. I know for a fact, you will regret it more than you know if you do.
Stop all contact its not your fault!!! Your not his mom not his girlfriend. You can’t help anyone that don’t see a problem. Go get a PFA if need be.
Once you left why try to contact him. He didn’t value you in the first place. He is sin sick and to blame you for his troubles is all wrong. Baby keep it moving, cut all ties. Leave the past in the past. If he didn’t appreciate you then he surely doesn’t now. Got and keep a God relationship with his son Jesus and be filled with the Holy Ghost. Stop man jumping because nobody will ever love you more than￼ Jesus. He found you to die for. God bless you!
when they try to place the blame on you and deny any wrong doing there is no way to help them because the only thing they are willing to change is you
Report your concerns to the authorities ! They can’t do anything but you will have it on record in case he does. Then if he tries something call them and they will be mire apt to arrest him
Walk away!! He is just trying to guilt you into coming back! It is a trap! We are responsible for our actions…he chooses to live the way he does…
Do not talk to him or acknowledge him. You will end up hurt… Been there, done that
Stay out and no contact with him. Move forward and live your life. Better than you feeling the way you were.
Stop being in contact with him and leave the situation behind you. You’re inviting trouble back into your life if you allow him to make you feel guilty about his current situation. Cut all contact with him, his family, friends or anyone associated with him.
Stop all contact. He is where he is because of HIM not you. Hes being manipulative. I was once in your situation and ones i stopped reaching out to help,all his attempts to reach me stopped. You also so dont want the toxicity to get in the way of your new relationship.
If worried go to police and get either a restraining order or a Order of protection
He definitely seems to be manipulative and trying to fill you with guilt. It is not healthy to stay in a toxic relationship, especially when kids are involved. It is not easy to walk away but you need to stay away even if it requires blocking, no contact or even changing numbers. Stay safe and look after you…
Personally, if it was me I’d wash my hands off him and move on. You can’t be blamed for the decisions he makes. I applaud you for wanting to help but honestly I think no matter what you do it’ll only hurt you in the end. Protect yourself first and foremost. He’s a grown man that can take care of himself.
You answered your own question… Quit engaging! Immediately! Do not see or speak to him or his family again ever! Simple.
Do not contact him. The situation he’s in is of his own doing. He’s manipulating you. Run and don’t look back
I was also in your shoes. I finally had to get a PFA against him. After violating this order, 6 months in jail, $1500 in fines, he finally got the message. DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU. He is a grown man and makes HIS OWN decisions.
Why did you contact him in the 1st place? Just block him for good.
You don’t want him finding you but you keep contacting him? That makes no sense. Leave him alone. He’s in charge of his own life.
Get out and stay out. A decent person would take responsibility for their own problems and fix it. They would not continue to blame it on you. Please just walk away and settle for nothing but decent people from this point forward.