I love my spouse but I am not happy being so far from my family: Advice?

So im really confused right now. I love me SO; I’m happy with him. My daughter loves him. He’s not her bio dad, but he’s been there since before she was born. He’s a great dad…and lately, we’ve been getting along ok… I just do not feel at home here in ky. I want to be closer to my mom and grandma, which are in Ohio. I want myþdaughter to make memories with my family…and wanna make memories with them, especially my mom, because shes recently sober. I’m at a loss. People keep telling me to follow my heart…but my hearts pulling me in both directions. I’m 18; he’s 20, and I kind of feel like I need to do this for me to have more help and better myself, but then I don’t want to leave him. He won’t move up there. I also feel like I need to do this for both of us to see if this is really what we both want/need… I just do not know what to do…I’m heartbroken either way. I’m just really not happy here…I’m happy with him…just not here, without my family… I just need some advice…please.

13 Likes

Why is he there… is the work and money better, what’s his reasoning for wanting to be there.

Ill trade you spots!!! I’d do absolutely ANYTHING to get the hell out of this state!!

1 Like

You are young and u need to realize your parents and family cant always be ur security blanket.

Ur not feeling at home because u focus on the past than the future.

Also if hes a great guy he will be with you forever and you will make a bigger family! Give it time.

20 Likes

It’s okay to miss family but when you marry that is your family now.

5 Likes

Sign up for some mommy and me play dates in your area and build your own little village of mom friends and I promise you, you’ll end up loving it there. You’re just lonely right now without your family and that’s normal but give it a while longer. If your SO makes you happy and loves your daughter like his own I say it’s worth staying around for.

3 Likes

Call ur family often. Visit when u can. I just moved n am a tad homesick also but don’t really have much family. It can b balanced it just takes time.

Be with the man who makes you happy! Our parents raise us to move away and flourish without them, they want us to find love and happiness even if it is away from them. Go back and visit your family whenever you can and your child will still make great memories with them. Also you can video chat or call them often to stay close.

4 Likes

I met my husband in Ga I’m from texas. I told my husband I was moving to texas I wanted him to come but if he didnt he didnt have too. He put in 2 week notice we moved back to my texas! he loves living in texas near my family! You can take the girl outta texas but cant take texas outta the girl! We will never leave texas our marriage is stronger and better here too! I lived in ga 6 years I was miserable live where your happy if your bf and you are meant to be you’ll make it! I regret ever leaving texas except I met my husband and have our baby boy who’s now 13. We’ve been here since 2008 and couldn’t be happier

Maybe take a vacation & visit your family!

You’re very very young. Your gut is telling you to go home for a reason.

6 Likes

This is really Serious… my dream has finally turned reality, it’s unbelievable that my wife came back to me within 48hours just the way Dr goko kuti assured me. I didn’t expect the spell would work so fast and that i will still be able to hold my wife by my side at night. I want to express my warmest gratitude to Dr goko Kuti … I’ll never ever forget all the happiness you given me, You are truly a man of your word and a man of great powers, I will highly recommend your services because you are the real deal. Thank you so much sir, i will tell it to everyone out there how you helped me via ([email protected] com)

2 Likes

All I know is wherever my husband is IS my home. I missed my family and watching nieces and nephews grow up. We made our own special memories, I loved being out of the drama zone as well. Family is important so I went up every summer and Christmas. My home is the kids I made and my husband.

So I was in this position. It’s difficult but I’m 20 and wanted to be closer to my mom and family. My boyfriend the father of our 2 year old son lives about 2 hours away from us and it’s hard but it is something I needed to do.
Not that you want to use your family as a security blanket like so and so said but maybe you just want to be near them?
I understand maybe used to the comfort and where someone would get that idea because you are so young to be do far but it’s a growing process. I’d start small. Invite them for the holidays to come celebrate with your family. Try and make it work through this month and if you still feel that way maybe it’s something you just need to do. But just saying being a parent by yourself most the time is hard there are challenges you wont see till your own your own.
Unless you plan on moving in with family? Which I do not recommend.

1 Like

I don’t know how far these places are from each other, I’m from Canada.
But I am living away from my family with my husband and daughter and do frequent visits with family , which makes it much less hard. It was hard in the beginning but it’s easier now. Where I live is better than I could have lived and that’s what I have to look at and I think same for you!

2 Likes

He has to allow you to go with baby and if not you can’t go! Would you really want to move back without your child?

If he is a good guy and treats you right, keep him! I’ve been through a similar situation until I realized that my future is with my man and our baby boy. That’s my family now! I still call my family back home and we’ve visited. But honestly you need to focus on your future with the family you created with this man. So think about it and give it time.

3 Likes

When you get with someone and raise kids together that is your family.

2 Likes

Family or a man I know which one I’d be choosing family will be there no matter what all the time go and make memories with your child and your family you’ve said he won’t move out there isn’t that a sign he wouldn’t do everything for you ? But I bet you’d move for him well you have if he wouldn’t even consider moving there or staying there occasionally to me that says it all he can’t love you and want everything for you if he wouldn’t do as he expects you too if it was me I’d go and make the memories with my child and move back to my family life is so short and you don’t know how long any of them have left cherish it make beautiful memories and give your child the best family unit ever x

2 Likes

You stated your mother is sober now that’s great do what’s best for you and your child mostly your child. It’s up to you and only you to make the best life you can for your child.